If you're of a certain age. you'll most likely remember "The Dating Game," a TV show in which a woman got to ask three bachelors (whom she could not see) a number of questions, eventually picking one to be her date based on how they all answered. The men were mostly attractive, although some much more than others, so it was always interesting to watch their faces when they finally met, after she first got to see the rejects, and then when the "winner" got to see her.
Trolling for men on craigslist is a lot like that.
Unlike online dating sites like Match or eHarmony, most men posting on Men Seeking Women don't post a photo. So when you respond to a photoless post, you're taking your chances like a contestant on "The Dating Game." Until a photo is sent, and perhaps even until you meet, you just don't know if there will be a spark or not. All he's got going for him is what he wrote and the way he wrote it, and if that somehow resonates with you.
I've read some very clever postings that I responded to, mostly ending in disappointment for one reason or another, begging the question: How can someone who writes with so much wit be such a dud in person?
But the majority of craigslist MSW postings are, well. head-scratchers. I mean, what are we to make of these Northern California (where I live) postings?A 48-year-old from Sonoma:" I am a bright energetic bisexual man who has played with men way too long. I want to meet an honest energetic open minded woman for conversation, long kisses and evenings out."A 49-year-old from Petaluma: "While thereï¿½s nothing toxic in the ex-in-law department, mine does not provide me w/any assistance right now, so money is real tight, I mean REAL tight, so Iï¿½m not getting out much these days."No age, no location but the guy knows what he wants: "SEX! Male seeks female for hook-up tonight... Hey, I'm a single attractive male trying a different approach here on CL. I'm looking for a hot spontaneous connection tonight with a woman age 30-50 who'd enjoy some attractive male attention plain and simple..."A 40-year-old from Larkspur: "Classic sad situation here... Mostly happy married male just wants a little bit more.... Does this make me a terrible person???
Me: a handsome, 40yrs, WM, 6"1", 210lbs, fit, college educated, clean cut professional with a full head of hair and the owner of a very healthy sex drive!
YOU: In a similar situation where you find yourself deserving and needing of male attention and some NSA fun! Also, your great sense of humor and healthy sex drive will go a long way with me."And, finally, a no age-no location man with this heading, "Happiness and Bills=U+Me=paid": "I'm looking for a petite white female that would be interested in having a part time boyfriend, I'm not looking for a full time anything, I'm single and live alone and like it that way. I do want to have a part time girlfriend to share intimate moments and I can share some of the fruits of my labor to help you with your needs."
I am wondering what woman in her right mind would answer any of these??
That said, at least these guys have one thing going for them ï¿½ they're being upfront and very honest
about themselves and what they want.
That's a lot more than most people on dating sites offer. Gotta give them credit for that!
Is that your experience, too? Kat Wilder's My So-Called Midlife