Did you share the tragedy with your children? We only disclosed the tragedy to our 13 and 16 year old boys. The little ones (3,3,1) we feel are entirely too young to carry such a burden of knowledge.
Cyn
To those of you affected most personally by the Virginia Tech shootings, the victims and their friends and families, I'm praying for you!
I think it's important to acknowledge to young children that sometimes bad things happen that we don't understand, to reassure them that they are safe, and that everyone they know and love is safe. This is a good time to reassure all our children and soothe their fears, as well as reminding them to respect the value, diversity and rights of others.
It's unlikely that we can shield children from all news reports and discussions that will follow this terrible event, or conceal our own sense of horror and deep sympathy for those whose loved ones were in harm's way. I agree that we should protect young children from details and perhaps even the general nature of the tragedy, but we can't be certain that they will remain unaware that something terrible happened.
Our children do carry a burden with such knowledge as they grow up. We might do everything possible to support their resilience and hopes for the future, and to prepare them for emergencies, but they can still struggle through periods when they are overwhelmed by despair and isolation.
I am so moved by the heartbreaking stories of the practical heroism and bravery of those who blocked doorways and helped students and classmates escape, the kindness and support they show one another, and the memorials they create. I hope that they do not hold themselves to a higher standard than first responders and other trained professionals who do have access to support and counseling after traumatic events.
What do we tell our children?
Who do we trust to advise us in unthinkable situations?
My hope is that we will go forward with a resolve to continue building more inclusive and safe communities, in memory of those exceptional young people and professors who lost their lives, were harmed, or otherwise affected, at Virginia Tech.
Right now, I wish I could gather my grown children around me, all their friends and past classmates, and shelter them all from harm. I would like to put my arms around and comfort every person in the Virginia Tech community, and hope they find the solace they will need in future months and years. Violence does cause special needs in children, teens and young adults.
Pam W
SE of Seattle
School Violence and Children with Special Needs
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