BellaOnline Forums Relationships Relationships Something sew right

It was a perfect gender switch-up.

i was working on my bike Saturday afternoon when my cell rang. It was Sean, the single dad I see from time to time.

"When would you use nylon thread instead of cotton?"

"Well, cotton's good for ... wait a minute. Where are you?"

"I'm at the fabric store. I'm going to make curtains."

Curtains? OMG! Has he turned all Alan Alda-Martha Stewart on me? I mean, I know he digs doing laundry, but still.

"Yeah, I'm like the only guy here."

"I bet you're loving that. Maybe you've stumbled on a new pick-up spot."

"Whatever. All I can say is, it's a good thing I'm secure in my masculinity."

You can say that again!

I love it when a man is comfortable doing the traditional "female" things, and vice versa. I love it when we can bust out of the expectations and gender roles we artificially place on ourselves and others. Who made those rules anyway, and who says we have to follow them?

Guys, would you, could you, should you get cozy in a fabric store?

Gals, could you love a man who did?

And is damask all wrong for a man's pad? Just wondering ... Kat Wilder: My So-Called Midlife

If you have read some of my other posts, Kat, you may know that my husband and I often settle into traditional gender roles.

I assure anyone who gets ideas that we fit into conceptual boxes that we don't. I can't sew or iron to save my life but he can and he does.

I don't think the skill of sewing is necessarily woman's work but I probably would find it odd if my husband took an interest in discussing satin vs silk or going nuts over prints.

It's great you two have a slightly off-the-straight-and-narrow partnership. I think that's a good thing.

And I get what you're saying about the satin vs. silk, but .. don't we need to know the difference between things like an infield fly ball and a suicide squeeze?

"don't we need to know the difference between things like an infield fly ball and a suicide squeeze?"

No but only because I have no interest in it nor does the knowledge effect or improve my life. There are other things considered "male" things that it's likely good to have at least a passing knowledge in....like those pipes or sink you once mentioned.

Beyond basic skills, we have to consider passions. I once mentioned in a post in marriage that my husband and I could not do each other's jobs because of either lack of aptitude or passion.

I lack the ability to do his as his skills have been acquired over years of experience. I lack the interest to learn and do even a portion of what he does.

He can handle the basics of what I do daily but he lacks the passion I put into it.

We just do what we are good at and are interested in. Does it really matter if it's men's work or women's work if it makes us happy or works for us?

I see nothing wrong with the switch as long as you are both comfortable with it. I have a good friend who used to run a small farm and cared for all the animals, including mucking the stalls. She preferred hunting to knitting and that was fine. They raised sheep, she sheared them, he spun the wool and knitted some beautiful items. Their love has lasted. I think she said they will be celebrating 36 years very soon.

Like they say, if it works for you. . .

Yes, Pam, I agree. As long as both people are OK with it, why not?
And if the rest of the world thinks it's weird ... it's their problem!!!