BellaOnline Forums Relationships Single Life What's wrong with wanting to remain single?

I enjoy being single and I have no desire of a relationship. Yet as I turned 23 today, I get a lot of remarks from friends - "23 and not in a relationship, what's wrong with you?"

I believe that being single I can still make a contribution to the world and I don't need my "other half" to be complete.

I find it sad that people have the view that single people out there cannot be happy without someone.

I think that we can be happy regardless of our circumstances and we need to make the best of whatever opportunity comes or way - single or not.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to remain single. I suppose some people might wonder if someone who doesn't want to have any relationship with anyone might not simply be antisocial, however. Most humans have a need for companionship. If you don't, more power to you. That said, you might find it easier to deal with those who think there's something wrong with you if you just said you weren't interested in a relationship right now and left it at that. No one has to know that it's a permanent situation.

I have seen few who decided to remain single and then met someone and fell in love immediately.

I'm 33 and feel perfectly fine remaining single too. I don't have the need to have a relationship with another person and I am more independant when I'm single. I'm also relieved that I don't have to answer to anyone.

Alicia, just because someone is single doesn't mean he/she doesn't want or need companionship. It just means he/she doesn't want to be in a romantic committed, monogamous relationship... now or maybe forever.

But we're not the same person at 23 and 33 that we are at 40 and 50 and 60. I guess we should say we're open to being who and what we are at the time, knowing that it can change (or not) when we choose. And it's nobody's business if and when that happens!!!

It is up to you & not anyone else if you want to be with someone or not. Anyone who is asking what is wrong with you is the 1 with the problem. I would tell them that. Judy K.

I agree, there's definitely nothing wrong with wanting to remain single. That does not mean that you are antisocial. You may have TONS of friends. You just don't want to be in a relationship. Relationships can be a lot of work, and they mean a lot of compromise. If you prefer to be able to make your own decisions - about when & what you eat, what you do in your free time, what you spend your money on, where you vacation, how you decorate your place etc. then being single is probably the best option. There are plusses and minuses to both being single and to being in a relationship.
Do what is best for you. Don't let anyone try to tell you that there is something wrong with you if you enjoy being single. Those people are just stupid and narrow minded. There is no ONE "best" way to live your life... you have to find what is "best" for you.

First let me introduce myself becuase i am new to this website and forum. I am 44 years old this year, and no stranger to marriage, although I am now single and intend to remain so. I took me a long time to realize that I am not marriage material; it also took two divorces, so I learned the hard way.
I not only enjoy being single, I do much better in life when not attached to any man. I am one of those women who fell for the big lie we are told that we must have a husband or partner in life.
There is nothing at all wrong with deciding to stay single, in fact - it is the best decision I have ever made!
I am able to work when I need and want to, and everything I earn is mine. I no longer need be concerned about the things I work so very hard for in life being stolen, nor must I be accountable to another person for anything. If I do well, great! If I mess up, it is on me and me alone.
Quite frankly, the only times that I have been messed up in my life were directly caused by a relationship or a marriage. I cannot believe it took me so long to learn!! lol
I am single and ecstatic to be so, I will never change that status again.
There is nothing wrong with you for wanting to stay single. This does not mean you cannot have a relationship, even a long term one. As long as they understand up front that marriage will never be an option. Cohabitation for me will never again be an option either as it is also extremely sticky to undo when it ends, so that is also understood from the beginning.
A long term exclusive dating relationship is not impossible as I had one for three years before it ended, and it did not end badly, but as friends. It also did not cost me everything I worked for as the marriages did.
Good wished to you in your choice to remain single !

Preferring to remain single is a personal choice. It's not a wrong or a right thing. How a person views it depends on how he or she has been programmed to believe.

I'm single at 48 and enjoying it.

I find that the people who generally make comments about others' perceived happiness or unhappiness, are really making a statement about their own situations. They ''want'' to believe that you, as a single person, are unhappy because it makes them feel better about themselves. I say enjoy every minute of single life and don't focus so much on being alone (it sounds like you do not). Ever notice that when something really good happens to you, that there will be some of your friends who just can't be happy for you? Well, it's the same with being single. :-)