BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids dogs instead of kids

Im pretty much decided not to have kids and the big reason is because of my love of dogs. I have three dogs now (and three cats) two pugs and a big 100 lb mixed breed. Now that my husband and I bought a row house in jersey city we are planning on getting doggies 4 and 5 in the next two years (that will be it for us) and they will be small dogs. i know 5 dogs is a huge amount but I get tired of people telling me Im absolutely nuts to have them and it occurs to me that no one ever says 5 kids your nuts or 4 kids your nuts. Also it annoys me when people, sometimes strangers, say oh you really need to have a baby. Or you cant get anymore dogs you wont have time for kids. I think all my maternal needs are satisfied by my dogs and my job (Im a teacher). Am I the only person liek this? also it annoys me that people keep implying my very well behaved dogs who rarely bark will annoy the neighbors when no one ever says kids annoy neighbors or admits that they can make disruptive noise. I myself love kids and dont mind the noise they make at all but my cute 3 year old nextdoor neigbor makes way more noise then my dogs

i hear that kind of thing all the time about my cats. It makes me crazy when people think i am caring for my cats as some sort of surrogate children. Why can't i just have cats because I like cats--not because I am trying to make up for what they perceive as a lack of something in my life!!

Another thing that gets me is that someone like you Tubby, may not have the energy to be an awesome teacher if you had your own kids. We would lose you as a resource. One would think that people would want to encourage teachers NOT to have kids, so that they can focus on their students.

That's a great point Chaco. If we encourage teachers to have kids, then they go out on maternity leave and possibly stay away longer. We have enough of a shortage of teachers in this country as it is.

I only have one dog, but would love to have 2. We haven't gotten another one yet though because it ties us down so much. At least with one we could take her on a road more easily (though it's still hard, especially in CA where dogs are so restricted, and there's a new law that you can't leave your dog in the car). For some reason I have the hardest time leaving dogs to go traveling. I can never find good pet sitters, and kennels are too sad. I've got to figure out that better.

I feel like my dog fulfills my maternal needs too, and I hear you Tubby, she is not a kid-replacement. I'm well aware that she's nowhere near the responsibility of a child. That's what I like about having pets instead!

Whenever someone asks me why I'm not having kids from this point forward I'm saying, "Thomas and Bridget (my two kits) would get jealous."

It's true though, besides the fact that I have never wanted kids, and don't like them, my babies would get jealous and upset and stressed. Plus, they wouldn't get the attention they deserve. I have bigger priorities than having kids, and that's taking care of the babies I have already. End of story.

Frieda, I know how you feel about leaving dogs to travel. I hate leaving my cats. If one of my cats did not hate the car so much I would bring them with me. I imagine it is harder with dogs who seem more dependant than cats. What I have been doing is trading off with a friend--I watch her animals, she watches mine.

DOGS = YES
KIDS = NO

My neighbors have 7 dogs (shh ... the limit is 4) and 5 exotic birds. I could never live in their house (2 bedroom house with 5 german shepherds, a beagle, a little white thing, and all those birds? Yee gads!)

What gets me is that so many apartment complexes will not allow pets... or at least charge extra rent for them. (My old place was $25/month for my declawed, elderly cat.)
Um, don't children have the potential to cause just as much damage and noise- if not more?
Grrr. That really annoyed me when I was trying to find an apartment last time.

Children are far more destructive than pets so that is why it is strange that so many allow children but not pets.
I suppose they are scared of getting sued over discrimination and the like.

I made the mistake of renting my house out to a family and trusting that the agent would report what had happened whilst I was gone. That was a lesson learned the hard way when I came back.

They'd reversed the door locks on the children's rooms so that they could lock children in there, there were marks all over the walls, a hole in one wall and fleas in the carpet. The thing that really got me was that they'd somehow managed to get crayon on the ceiling. When I confronted the agent and said that it wasn't acceptable, her words were "Your level of wear and tear would be different to a family, you had to expect this". In the end, I wouldn't let them have their bond back and also pursued the matter so that the repairs would be paid for.

Unbelievable. We now screen so that we don't have families as tenants.

I can't believe the agent would have that attitude towards you! Did you end up taking them to court, and did they do the repairs? And yes, maybe some damage is to be expected, but refusing to take responsibility or do repairs isn't acceptable. I hope the matter was settled for you.