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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 4,055
Elephant
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OP
Elephant
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 4,055 |
Well, I've got a first date coming up later this week and it got me to thinking about what you look for in a new potential person. This is not a blind date, but I have not met this person face-to-face before, having met him via the internet.
Over Thanksgiving, I was chatting with some friends. One said it was important to her to find out how the person feels about New York City (we all live in SF, CA). Another looked at the man's hands. One woman looked at what sort of shoe's he wore. A gay man at the party said he wanted to know if the other guy could cook.
I tend to look for any hints of "gentlemanly" behavior, does open doors? Have any table manners? Pick up the whole dinner tab or suddenly ask me to pay for my half?
What sort of things do you look for when you go out with someone for the first time?
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 206
Shark
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Shark
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 206 |
how he treats other people. does he talk about himself, ask questions,etc. mostly i try to be my self. if he cant be, then he never will be. good luck.
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 394
Shark
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Shark
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 394 |
Definitely how he treats other people. You can always tell a lot about people by how they treat people in general, not just those they are trying to impress. I also look for shared activities. I would much rather be with someone who loves hiking and biking, like I do - it makes for a more well rounded relationship.
It's how you deal with failure that determines how you achieve success. - David Feherty
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 206
Shark
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Shark
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 206 |
I LIKE IT WHEN THEY TREAT U LIKE A GODDESS THEN TREATS THE WAITRESS LIKE [censored]!
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1
Newbie
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Newbie
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1 |
personally what I think is that, we should not look for "nothing". Cuz I ll tell u most of the ppl on their first date would try to put on a facade of 'Yeah I am good, better than u think'. Well then how the heck we would figure what is the actual he or she ? and yeah I came across this article which discusses about it in length( I dun beleive them either) but u can have a look at it here is the link
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 9
Newbie
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Newbie
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 9 |
I like when they don't talk all about themselves, BUT i do like to get to know them some so like them to talk some.
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 2,090
Koala
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Koala
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 2,090 |
How did your date go Rae?
Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin. ~anonymous~
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 37
Newbie
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Newbie
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 37 |
First dates: the greatest turn off? someone who talks about himself, his achievementssss, his good sides and everything that has to do with putting his best foot forward.
I personally would want to hear him talk about what his passions are in life? what type of girls he respects and how is his relationship with his mother.
Then the man should have a good ear. Some men pretend to listen and agree but they didnt actually comprehend all that you've said.
Well, normally you will feel it if there's that spark!
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Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 66,288
Highest Posting Power Known to Humanity
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Highest Posting Power Known to Humanity
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 66,288 |
that she not looking at other women, the most important issue would be how she deals with me i have multiple personalities and i'm dealing with agoraphobia, oh well starting a new relationship just scared me away, my girlfriend of several yrs was very understanding she called me her rosie and my 4 drawfs (personalities) she said she love us all,even the fresh one, she passed away in 99 and i've been alone since, i avoid people, to mant issues
Rosie L
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 83
Amoeba
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Amoeba
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 83 |
I like to listen very carefully, because sometimes in a joking way they tell you something very important, and if you're not careful, you'll think they're joking, but they're telling you the truth to see how you handle it. And then, later when it turns up as a problem, don't be surprised, because they tried to tell you and you didn't listen.
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Avon
by Angie - 05/20/25 08:42 AM
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