BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Faking It

Ok, I know there are some CF's here who truly like children and some who do not.
I myself can tolerate them for very short periods of time. However, I always feel as though am I "faking it" around children as in faking interest in their toys/activities/conversations, etc. Co-workers and very good friends talk to me about them all the time and I just have no interest, none at all. Truth be told, I am fake-smiling and faking interest whenever anyone is talking to me about their kid's school play/football game/soccer game/the most recent toy craze. None of it is remotely interesting to me. I just cannot force myself to find any of that stuff fascinating.
Anybody else feel like you are faking it?

P.S. I know some people will ask why bother to fake it? I guess because I really do like some of these people and I don't want to hurt their feelings. To be honest, most of these people were a lot more interesting to be around before they had children.

Yes, I fake - all the time. I fake because I am not naturally mean and do not like intentionally hurting peoples feelings. You do have to be careful so as not to fake too good. Be polite but don't over-indulge. If they have any common sense whatsoever, they'll see that you're not hanging on their every word and will quickly move on to something mutually interesting. Those who do not, well, I just ignore them and continue working. What else can you do?

As a general rule, I prefer not to be in the presence of children, however toddlers are handsdown the worst. Parents allow their children to dominate a group of adults with their stupid antics and attention sponging ways.

There is a time and a place for children. And they are far too often in the wrong place at the wrong time. I have had pleasant moments with my nieces and nephews and they adore us. We just don't tolerate a bunch of garbage from them and keep it simple. They do as they're told and are respectful towards others or else. Makes for a pleasurable visit.

Fire

I'm with Fire on this one. I fake, but try not to sound TOO convincing, otherwise I get sucked in way more than I want. But it's like that with anyone who's talking about anything that they think is neat and I find boring. About 5 years ago I made the mistake of pretending to be way more into a conversation with a coworker (about what, I don't remember now) than I was...and he ended up asking me out several times and it was really uncomfortable for about a year after that. So I've learned to be a little more guarded in my fake interest!

I babysat a lot when I was a teenager and I think I used up all my "aw...isn't that cute" moments by the time I was 20. Now, it's just kind of boring.

Oh yeah I fake it. It would be really mean & rude if one of your co-workers showed you a picture of a beloved child/neice/nephew, said "Isn't he/she cute?" and my response was "No, not really".
I usually try to find SOMETHING nice that I can comment on in the picture like "that is a cute dress they are wearing" or "is that your mom holding the baby? she looks a lot like you" or "That's a cute haircut" etc.
I don't find babies/children cute for the most part (maybe one in 100 is "cute" to me), but I try not to lie and say the kid is cute if I don't mean it. By complementing the kid's outfit or commenting on the setting I can usually dance around the subject.
I'm not sure what I would do if someone really pressed me on the issue... maybe I'd just say that I'm not a good judge of kid cuteness.
I guess many of us "fake it".

I'm a faker. But inside I'm rolling my eyes and thinking, "And I care about your kid's [censored] why?"

Seriously, what is with talking about the poop? I'm going to start talking about my [censored] one day. "Ooooh, green and mushy, you say? Yes, mine was firm and brown, although there was this one spot that looked like cement!"

I also am a faker. I have to be. As mentioned above, I don't go overboard with it. I just feign polite interest....but not a ton of enthusiasm. But I am surrounded by parents, grandparents, etc. Their kids are the most important thing in their lives. In my job, especially, I need to at least act interested in their lives and what is important to them. I can't really say, "yeah...looks like every other baby out there," or whatever.

I do not think 95% of kids are cute. But like others have mentioned, I will try to say something nice about a picture or whatever.

HOWEVER...for those at work who know that I'm CF and really don't have an interest in babies yet they keep yammering away about their kids and showing me pictures....I'm a tad less polite.

Agreed. I find I'm the same way with the folks in our office - I'll politely listen for a while. But be warned - take it too far and I'm going to start talking about my rabbits and their poop!

I've also used the kid thing in mindless coversation - "how's Susie doing in school? She's in what grade this year?" and sit back and let the parent blather away while I think "grocery store.. pick up dry cleaning... maybe I can still make that 7:00 movie." Throw in an occasional nod and amazed "wow" and I'm good. What I find most interesting is that parents have to be able to tell you're not really listening, yet they go on and on anyway.

I think a lot of us fake interst in anything that we arent really into, other peoples kids, pets. Im sure Ive droned on about my dogs/cats while my friends feigned interst. It only bothers me when people are fifty fifty. I gave my god daughter a present and when her father called me to thank me he spent the whole time we were on the phone talking to her and reading her a story! It kind of annoyed me.

I guess "faking interest" is a give and take thing. I realize that many people feign interest when I rattle on about my bunnies. But how many times have I been polite to these same people, listening to them go on about their kids?

Tubby, at least your friend called to say thank you. Most of the time, we send gifts and never hear if they were received or not - at least until I ask point-blank the next time I talk to the parent. This is far less irksome with the people we see frequently - at least we usually get a "thank you" next time we see them. But those out of state-out of mind types, who USED to be good about it, drive me nuts. I mean, these people can't even email to say thanks??

This year, I'm sending gift cards because they requie SO much less thought and effort on my part. I'm tired of wracking my brain over what little Jimmy would like when I don't have a clue what a 10yr old boy likes and or what he already has!

Oh, I also meant that I am "faking it" when an actual kid is talking to me, not just the parents. Pretending to be excited with them about whatever random toy they happen to be going on and on about. Fake smiling, nodding my head, (I have even caught myself trying to make my voice higher to fake some level of excitement) even though i really have no interest. As in "You got a new toy, YOU DID?" Why do I do this and does anyone else "fake it" when interacting with children?