BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Lets leave this forum

I've no idea exactly what happened, being new to this board, but if the person running it wants to impose a few rules and standards, that's her right, same as it's anyone's right to do so in their home.

In my opinion, the problem with most childfree boards is the lack of tolerance for differing opinions. No one can go on most of the other boards and carry on a true discussion without being bashed, called childish names and cut off from the board. That doesn't seem to be the problem here and I would guess it's because the board is moderated. That's not "tiptoeing" around. It's respect for others. The same respect you demand for your life choices.

There's no need to use hateful language to or about anyone, parenting skillls notwithstanding. It's nice that such behavior is not tolerated here, as it allows for a genuine exchange of views without rancor or silly epithets being thrown about ignorantly and indiscriminately.

But that's the thing: most of us aren't throwing around the terms indiscriminately. Yes, there are some who will call anybody a "breeder" or "moo," but that's a minority. For me, I save those terms for the most ignorant of childrearing adults because they don't deserve the term "parent." Creating a baby a parent does not make. There's a lot more that goes into it. Despite their many many flaws, I would still consider my parents to be parents because they did their job in raising two daughters and they did it well.

And for those who abuse their kids? Well, the world is just lucky I can hold back what I really want to call (and do to) them.

It's simple ranting to vent frustrations and amongst a group of those who feel and think the same.

Garble, but a forum called married no kids is bait for anyone who may be fertile.

A new name would help, but this kindygaren nonsense will not drive me away!!!

A new improved name may have the word childfree in it; try googling childfree, and see what you find!

Why is it necessary to call anyone "breeder" or "moo" or any other name? The quality of someone else's parenting is a matter of opinion, to which all of us are entitled, but there's no need to call others by childish names just because you dislike what they do or disagree with their actions and/or opinions. Namecalling is counterproductive and needless.

And that is one of the problems I see in most CF boards. They would rather complain and burst out with infantile namecalling than genuinely discuss real issues. Venting is one thing but incessant whining, which is the hallmark of most CF boards, is something entirely different. Most of the regulars on those boards do exactly what they accuse "breeders" of doing. Hypocritical in my opinion.

I don't know what CF boards you've been roaming, but the ones I frequent are usually discussing "real" issues that are related, like birth control, abortion, sterilization, etc. in between the ranting.

And I don't know how you vent, but everybody I know does use name-calling in their rants when annoyed or [censored]. If somebody had irritated you and you're blowing off some steam to family, friends, or whoever, yeah, you'll use some not-so-nice terms. You're probably guilty of the same crime, so you can step off the high horse.

Parenting quality may be subjective in some areas, but if somebody lets their kid run around a restaurant screaming and they don't calm the kid down, there are going to be very few people, CF or not, that are going to have anything nice to say about the parents. But what do I know? I just had parents kept my [censored] in line (and I was no picnic as a child, as hyper as I was).

There's venting in person with a small group, and venting on public chat boards. I do those differently. Won't go into reasons why as they are probably common sense.

I agree with Hatsumomo that CF is many things. Unfortunately what happened with this forum is that it got bogged down with only a few topics - breeders and bratty kids. Coupled with a whole lot of unnecessary name calling. Also don't recalling seeing you Hatsumomo many months ago when I left the forum because of the overall negativity. There's enuf negative in life, I don't need more, no matter how righteous one may believe the subject is, it's really fruitless.

Lose the attitude, please, Hatsumomo. I'm not on a high horse and please don't accuse me of such when all I've done is express my opinion, same as anyone else here. My opinion differs from yours. That's all. If you wish to discuss something as opposed to throwing out unfounded accusations, fine. But please don't get all snarky because you don't agree or don't like what was said.

As for other CF boards, I've been on or watched several of the usual. After a while, they all sound alike. And there was precious little discussion between the constant whining and complaining and childish namecalling. That's fine if that's what one wants to do. I don't see it as a productive use of time, nor does it solve anything.