Lots of people (not just parents) seem to have lost their manners of late. Basic "excuse me" moments at the grocery store seem to go unnoticed. I say "please", "thank you", "excuse me", "ma'am" and "sir" reflexively. When you've been reared correctly and you have your priorities straight as an adult, this stuff comes reflexively. If you have to think about it every time ("duh...should I be polite this time, or is it too much trouble?...duh"), there's something wrong. It should be like brushing your teeth or putting on your seat belt...your reflexive of going through the day. End of story.
Of course, it's difficult to notice that the folks who've taken it upon themselves to raise the next (too large) generation seem to be the ones most devoid of these common courtesies. ("I've bred --- isn't that enough of a contribution to society? Why must I also be polite?"). Puh-leez. Um, because, Mom, just popping out the kid isn't a favor to society. Only if your kid becomes a decent human being is it a favor (which is why I think people should congratulate parents not at the moment of birth of their children, but maybe when your kid makes it to 30 successfully, as a fully functional, contributing adult). Yep, I'm a crazy dreamer...
We've lost that reflexive politeness habit, and we're the poorer for it. Manners are what prevent wars. Civility is on the wane, folks, as the population grows.
As one of my bumperstickers states: "Fewer humans --- more humanity".
Elise
Very good points and I've never quite wrapped my mind around it that way... Parent do see their children as a "contribution to society" at the moment of birth rather than a lifestyle choice, like pets or hobbies. In fact, this contribution seems to extend to pregnancy or even before as a certain smugness about "planning to contribute." THAT'S CRAZY!!! I mean the CF is a personal choice for me, not a crusade. I just don't really want the things that kids bring to a persons life. But so many people who have kids think about it as some sort of contribution to global well-being; their gift to the planet. Really drives me nuts when these people are also preaching conservation, recycling and so on. A coworker describes them as the same folks who drive the Lexus to alternative transportation meetings... No one would expect others to make allowances for lifestyles choices like say, really preferring 15 weeks of vacation a year or needing to sleep in late every morning; those would be seen as accomodations we are expected to absorb ourselves if we want them. It seems children used to be seen that way, as perhaps only a contribution when and if they contributed. A professor I had in grad school said that Jews believed that pregnancy could be terminated up until the child received their masters degree. Not sure if they were kidding... <img src="/images/graemlins/devil.gif" alt="" />
Don't even get me started on the manners thing these days...
