BellaOnline Forums Relationships Single Life Coming Home to an Empty House

My latest article talks about ways to make coming home to an empty house a little easier.

Do you think it hits home?

What do you do to make an empty house seem less empty?

My solution has always been to keep busy, and like I say in the article, having my cat helps a lot <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

P.S. Has anyone seen the Sex and the City episode about SSB (Secret Single Behavior)? Just seemed relevant to the topic at hand...

Yes, a pet is MOST helpful! I went through a year and half of coming home to an empty house. My daughter had moved out, my cat had died, I was layed off from work and collectors were hounding...what a God awful year! Then I found my puppy dog...the most loving, loyal and happy dog I've ever seen...when I adopted him he was recovering from surgery so having him and having to get him healthy and whole again helped keep me focused elsewhere...I saved him and he saved me and to this day I can walk in my house from one of the most stressful days and he just melts it ALL away in a matter of minutes.

I realize that I'm in the minority on this one - but I like coming home to my pets and no one else.

My job is very high stress, and I am "on call" at virtually all hours during particularly complex cases. My home is my sanctuary. I've created an imaginary boundary that starts at my driveway and inside it is my safe zone - the place where I can finally relax and recover from the day's or week's stresses.

In my home, I can surround myself with the sounds, sights and smells I enjoy and not have to worry about someone else wanting to know why I am playing that music, or up at 2:00 a.m., painting my bathroom that lovely shade of lavendar.

The older I get, the more set in my ways I get and more territorial also. So living alone is a definite plus for me.

I definitely can see the merits of living alone--I remember one weekend back in college when my ex wasn't around, I got to do what *I* wanted--I turned the heat up as high as I wanted because he wasn't there to complain about it. I ate my favorite Ramen noodles, which he always hated the smell of and asked me not to eat in his presence. I watched what I wanted on TV and stayed up half the night surfing the 'net with no one complaining. It was beautiful.

The other night I was hanging out with one of my former bosses and the other one's girlfriend...the other one is out of town this weekend, and I almost said to her, "oh, man, you're a free woman for the weekend!" until I considered maybe not everyone considered that a good thing. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I think I'd like to have a happy medium...

I look to my house as a "home" and not just a place to be when I'm not doing something else. I don't have a pet, but I do keep a variety of houseplants. I also try and have my home be comfortable and welcoming, not only to me, but to friends of mine.

I just recently moved in with somone. Wasn't exactly what I wanted to do, but that's a long story. Anyway, we get along fine (the whole mixing the children thing is is yet another story. Argh!)But man, do I miss coming home alone to a peaceful house, the way I left it, the way I decorated it (no footballs on the fireplace mantel!) the food I left the fridge (no worms for the fish on the same shelf as the milk!)

He went away for a week for work and I missed him but you know, it was nice... I was single for a time and I under stand the concept of coming home to an "empty" house but if you're energy is in it and it's your home, it's like what sharpchick said, it's your sanctuary. Aaaah, sorry just a bit of reminiscencing here...

You can have both, though. Me and my wife just bought a new home that is two story and I have my room and she has...the rest of the house. I love that I can come home and go to my room and relax and not be bothered. She doesn't go in my room to clean or anything. It's my place to have how I want. I have my games and stuff. I love it. We have an understanding. Of course there is a common area for sin. Anyway, you don't have to be single to enjoy some of the "Single" perks. You just need to have good communication and respect for each other. It's not easy either, but it's definitly worth it.

I currently LOVE coming home to an empty house. (Except for my 3 cats!) My love and I parted ways in April (very similar to your story, Katja!) Then my youngest child moved out in August. It then dawned on me.....I had NEVER lived alone in my life (and I'm 49!) I love being able to have things exactly the way I want them. I can do what I want, when I want. I never really was very good at sharing, anyway, mainly because I was an only child.
My door is always open for those I love, but, for now, this is how I like it.

That's awesome Starshyne57. Enjoy your time. Get home from work and eat dessert first!