BellaOnline Forums Relationships Relationships Are Swingers Happier?

You know I have seen some talk shows that featured couples that are into swinging. I have also met a few couples that swing. I hate to say this but they really seem genuinely much happier than your average couple.
Why do you think that is?

...."seem genuinely happy" may be the key phrase there.....

This is just my opinion - take it or leave it as you will...

It all seems very exciting and trendy to begin with, but I have the impression that at one point or another, jealousy or resentment may surface, if one or either member breaks the rules....
swingers have to have rules...the whole situation is fraught with risk.... so there have to be self-imposed, mutually agreed guidelines to which both parties agree....
And human emotions being as fragile and fickle as they are, it only takes one tiny incident to shift the whole thing off kilter....
To my mind, the only ones who truly profit are those who seem to have no conscience....They are hell-bent on personal gratification and enjoyment, and are either ignorant or careless of the emotions of others....
When working in association with a Relationships Counselling Body, I encountered couples who had dabbled in such things, either by experimenting, or through long-term involvement....
I never met a happy one....

It is a temporary fix for many, and a long-term enjoyable and gratifying 'hobby' for very few...

Who is defined as a swinger? I searched and reached a forum of swingers. There was all talk of sex. Can anybody help me?

A swinger is basically someone who attends a "partner-swopping" party...
These people, (usually married, but also just dating)attend with their consentiln partner, annd they engage in casual sex with another person....
they are sometimes observed by their proper partner, or sometimes they engage in a threesome, or sometimes they go off and 'do their own thing'...
Neither of them regards it as infidelity....

If these people are called swingers than they would not even know what is happiness.

I've got a swing in my yard, it keeps me happy for hours on end, much better than all that pervy stuff (no offence). Then again, no, forget this.

actually familychoice - I'm entirely with you on this one - !! <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I'm sure part of the thrill of swinging is that culturally we're brought up (for the most part) to believe in monogamy and fidelity and the fact that it is considered taboo makes it attractive to some. Many people cannot disconnect love from physical sex and that's where many of the issues come in.

Do you consider an open marriage the same as a swinging? Why or why not?

An 'open' marriage is not quite the same as "swinging" because an open marriage does not always involve both partners simultaneously, or having threesomes...
I knew a couple who were in an open marriage, but the thought of swinging with other couples did not appeal to them....they preferred to go their own way, and keep it third-person distant from each other....

Swingers always belong in an open marriage...
open marriages do not always swing.

It's all swings and roundabouts.