BellaOnline Forums Food and Wine Etiquette Please... Excuse Me... Thank You!

This past Saturday I was shopping at Wal-Mart. And while I was shopping, apparently a woman was walking behind me, but I didn't know it until I just so happened to turn around to look for my mother.
When I turned the lady pushed past me as though I deliberately held her up.

If this lady wanted to get past me so much, why didn't she just say "Excuse Me"? For the rest of the shopping trip, I took notice of how many people said "Excuse Me" when they needed to get past and "Thank You" when they were allowed to move past and I noticed that very few people said excuse me and instead would just continue to walk in the path of another expecting the other person to simply move out of their way.

So I'm posting a poll here and I need your help. If you could, for the next two weeks, also take notice of this trend and when you see people who are doing this, please add the number to the poll.

And as always, your comments on your experiences are welcome! <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

How many times have you noticed the above situation? single choice
	I've seen this happen in at least 6 different scenarios
	I've seen it a few times (2-5 scenarios)
	I rarely notice this.
Votes accepted starting: 03/06/06 03:40 AM
View Results

I didn't even need to do the research; this is something I see often. If someone has stopped in my path I don't have a problem just saying "excuse me" and then "thank you" in a cheery sort of way. But I've seen lots of people barge through aggressively and I've seen others standing silent and seething, like your lady, who took your mid-aisle stop as a personal affront. I don't get it. <img src="/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

You fogot to include the inevitable eye-rolling and "humphing" as they go past! <img src="/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

"Courtesy: A form of polite behaviour practised by civilised people when they can be bothered to find the time."

I tend to make a personal distinction between 'Manners' and 'Courtesy'...;
for my own definition, Manners is how we behave in social situations, such as utilising good Table Manners, or not interrupting the speaker in, say, a meeting or conference.... leaving a hall during a performance, if you have a bout of coughing...
Courtesy, I find, is how one person interacts with another...opening a door, offering a seat, sending a 'thank-you' note....

These definitions appear to be largely academic in any case.
Both forms of behviour are either largely redundant, or extinct.

Maybe largely, but not completely!

At Six Flags last year, I was trying to get on and off the train that goes 'round the park with my son and his stroller (he's crazy about trains). I was really struggling, and this young man, probably about 15 left his group of buddies to come help me get all my stuff down.

I had been passed up by countless adults - but this one teen took the time to help me out. He was wearing jeans that I was worried were going to fall off at any minute because they were so "droopy", chains off the jeans, and had a serious afro; but was so helpful I just about cried. (I did still want to pull his pants up though, LOL)! <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Snorty! <img src="/images/graemlins/tongue2.gif" alt="" />

I am teaching my 2 yr old grandaughter please and thank you, excuse me. We were at Walmart and two men were blocking the very end of the isle and I say "excuse me" and they look at me and finally move so that I can leave the isle and as we walk past them my grandaughter says "excuse you". I had to laugh at that one! A 2 yr old had better manners than those two!

As my mother always used to say "good manners cost nothing"* which is completely true! How often do you go into a shop and ask for a kilo of good manners? You can't! They don't cost anything, so what she said was completely brilliant! Although you can go into a record shop and ask for some Bad Manners**, the legendary British ska band of the eighties fronted by Buster 'lip up fatty' Bloodvessel (love your work fatty, no offence). What was that song they did now...'knees up mother brown' I think. So, what was I talking about? It doesn't matter now anyway. So don't worry about it or even think about it. It's as though you haven't read the last paragraph which if you haven't, well then, that's just fine. See if I care. Which I do and I don't. See? That's the beauty of my enigmas.

Actually, I've just remembered, it was manners wasn't it. Anyway, my mother always said...oh I've done that bit already***. My personal opinion is that if someone pushes in front of me like that then I'm justified in giving them a ruddy good punch in the trousers!!!!

* that's true that is
** not the lethargic response from the pimply teenager at the checkout idly picking his, well you know. Anyway, stop reading this and go back up to the main thing. Gon on.
*** forget about this

I am trying to teach my kids these things. It is hard when you have adults being rude and the kids think it is not important. I take my kids to the Dollar Tree. It is the best place to practice Excuse me. The aisles are so small you can hardly get through, but my son (4) knows to say, "Excuse me" as we pass people. My daughter(22 months) shocks people when she says please and thank you. When did it become shocking to have manners.

BTW Michelle, you never know how a guardian angel will dress. Even they need a belt. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

My partner was nearly blasted by a woman for whom he opened a door...
She swung round and snapped, sharply,
"You don't have to open the door for me just because I'm a lady!"

He retorted -
"I didn't - I held it for you because I'm a gentleman."

The look on her face was priceless.