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Hey guys..............lily here.............latest on European Union!


European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.


As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

Lily. I relie needed a laugh today and you supplied it. Thancs.

Thanks, Lily <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Lily
UNFAIR TO THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE!! I would accept your spelling if Poland did the same sort of thing - 'ch' is 'ch' not 'hhhh'; all z's, whether or not they have diacritics are 'z'; 'c' is never 'ch', always either soft c or hard c (k); and so on. But you can say this about any language (even American), so why pick on the wonderfful English (UK) language!! {:-)))
Leslie

Leslie..........hey guy...........lily here!

English language - so formal - so proper - humor just wouldn't be the same with Polish! Naaaaaa!

lily

Hi Lily (best wishes too to Dick)
You are saying the Polish language isn't humorous?! When place names are pronounced such as Lodz (the L with a diacritic) = Wots; Wroclaw (the l again with a diacritic) - Vrokwav; Krakow (with an o diacritic) = Crackuv; Warszawa = Varshava. I can't go on as I am laughing my head off!
Lukster, Inglish ain't proper like partikerly when its Cumbrian!
Pozdrawiam
Leslie (Just in fun)

++++European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. +++

I wonder why German? Germans are not that crazy about their language as French are <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Because otherwise Lily's joke would not have worked so well. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

The Europeans are voting that the English language should be English. How amusing since the American government recognizes only Spanish here. No matter where you go it is English and Spanish translations. This is one topic that sets my BP to mars and maybe the black hole. I learned to speak English, my mom and dad too. So did my German and Italian, Cambodian etc friends. No one sends us forms in our languages, or instructions, or ATM choices or phone prompts. This country has many nationalities yet the government is only favoring the Hispanics. What is their problem that they also once here learn as the rest of us do and did. If you go to any other country on this planet they do not change theirs to accomodate immigrants. I know when I bring this up I find all my other foreign born friends with the same feelings.

Sorry, but I don't see it as a problem. If the Hispanic immigrants want to speak Spanish - let them, and let the government do what it wishes. If you ask/tell a Hispanic to do something and they reply ' No habla Americano' tell them to go away. In this way 'rdywenur' your BP will stay as normal as it ever it. And if you really want something done, find an American-speaking person. In this way, any Spanish-speaking-only Hispanics will soon realise what language they have to learn to live in your country, whatever pandering the government does to them. I would say that this applies to all immigrant races also - after all if you went to live in France, you would HAVE to learn to listen to, speak, read and write French.
On the question of the EU official language, I do not completely agree. Let market forces develop the requirement unless all 25 countries agree. After all, 150 years ago when Britain was the major country in the world, almost everybody who could, spoke English as their second language, if it wasn't their first.
Being very racist here - if America does not want Europe to have English as the official lanuage - tough! America is not in Europe -united or not!!

Leslie (I have lived and worked in France - spoke French; I have lived and worked in Spain - spoke Spanish; I have worked in Poland - unfortunately my Polish is limited, but if I lived there I would HAVE to learn it)