BellaOnline Forums Relationships Marriage Unhappy Marriage

My husband and I have been married for almost six years and have a 10 month old daughter. The problem is that for the past three years, every few monthes my husband tells me that he doesn't like me, doesn't want to be married to me, doesn't plan to be with me much longer, ect. Then, after a few days or so he will say that he didn't mean it, he was just bored, just upset, ect. At first, his leaving seemed like the worst thing in the world. I hate divorce and the thought going through it myself was humiliating. Now, after three years of this yo-yo, I am getting tired of hearing it. Now, I wouldn't be that upset if he left, it would be a relief in many ways. At least it would be over, not the constant uncertainty. I've even considered leaving, but I just haven't got the heart (or the guts) to leave.
I know, the first thought is to go to counseling, but my husband flatly refuses to even talk about such a thing. I'm left trying to deal with this on my own, ashamed to tell my family what is going on. Any advice?

Oh my sweetie, Im so sorry. Could you two be under stress from work and a new baby? Do you spend time together alone and have things you like to do in common?

I'm very sorry about this turmoil in your life and marriage. You said you husband flatly refuses to consider counseling, but perhaps you should consider it for yourself. His behavior has had to have some effect on your own self-esteem, and perhaps you could use the counseling to unburden some of your anxiety and pain. This type of emotional roller coaster is not only taxing to your relationship, but it can be bad for your health. Your child, though very young, can also be affected by your emotional state.
By taking the lead in at least helping yourself, you can break the routine and begin moving toward a better situation.
I hope and pray for the best for you and your family.