BellaOnline Forums Religion and Spirituality New Age Rituals (of all kinds) in daily life

Greetings all!

I've just finished reading Robert Fulghum's book, From Beginning to End - The Rituals of Our Lives, and it prompted me to go back and start re-reading Dianne Sylvan's The Circle Within - Creating a Wiccan Spritual Tradition.

I was raised Roman Catholic (heavy on rituals there!), but haven't considered myself Christian for some time, although I honor and respect all paths. I have studied Wicca a bit, but don't consider myself Wiccan - there are some things that just don't "speak" to me in Wicca. Some would consider me a pagan, but I don't call myself that. I'm just a seeker, like so many others.

Anyway, I have found that one thing I've really missed about Christianity was the established ritual of the church. However, I look at my friends and family, and, although they may call themselves Christian, or Jewish, or whatever, it doesn't seem to me that it has much place in their everyday lives, either.

So, if anyone would like to share with me:
How they feel about rituals, and the spiritual aspects of them;
Any thoughts on those two books, or others that deal with rituals - big and small;
Bringing spirituality into daily life;
Or anything vaguely related...!

I'd love to read your thoughts on the subject!

Blessings!
Mary

P.S. If you haven't read Sylvan's book, The Circle Within, and you aren't Wiccan or Pagan, I'd still recommend it to you. There is so much universal in it that I'd like to give it to my oh-so-Methodist sister, if I thought she'd read it! :-) (But she'd be so afraid one of her congregation might see it, that I may never have the courage to offer it to her. Oh well.)

Great thoughts & questions! I haven't read the books you mentioned. Starhawk's The Spiral Dance is one of my favorites and I love Thomas Moore's books - The Care of the Soul, Original Self, The Re-enchantment of Everyday Life. Sarah Ban Breathnach's Simple Abundance is another book I really like for this.

I think there are a lot of ordinary things that are rituals but we just don't think of them that way, like my daughter and I read stories at bedtime and have a special bedtime hug she invented. Maybe you kiss your partner goodbye every morning as you leave for work or call your mom every Sunday or get a cup of coffee at your favorite cafe with friends every week. Maybe you walk the dog down your favorite street every day or just sit and watch the hummingbirds on your porch.

Any thing like that can be a spiritual experience if you attend to it with awareness and a soulfulness. A lot of my deeply spiritual moments have come that way. I'm just doing something ordinary I've done a hundred times, like washing dishes and listening to a favorite CD, and suddenly my heart blows open and I can feel how holy and precious every little moment is. Heather <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Thank you, Heather, for some ideas for further reading!

I have heard so much about The Spiral Dance, but it hasn't come my way yet. And I'll be looking for the others, too.

I have tried to instill more "awareness" into my daily life, but it's difficult when I'm the only one around here really interested in that. I'm gaining a fresh appreciation of community in the sense that it makes creating and maintaining rituals easier!

A few years back, after much off and on discussion about it, my husband and I decided to become vegetarian, for ethical reasons. (Before I upset anyone who eats meat - we are NOT fully vegetarian even now, although we'd like to be - and I would NEVER criticize anyone who chooses to eat meat! This was just a personal decision that was right for us.)

We found it difficult to be completely vegetarian, and have so far just succeeded in limiting ourselves to fish and other seafood, although I'm working on that.

Not long afterward, I read The Circle Within, and decided to try to be more "aware" of the food I eat. I try not to eat or drink anything until I have thought about - and given silent thanks to - all of the living beings that have contributed to bring the food to me - the plants and animals, the farmers, and those who process the raw materials and prepare the ingredients and the final product.

I'm not always great about remembering to do this, but, when I do, it's a wonderful experience. To me, it makes even more sense than the "grace" I learned as a (Catholic) child. At the best of times, I eat my meal feeling a connection with all things in the Universe, and with the divine that is inherent in them.

I like the idea of your daughter's special hug! :-) I have no children, but have had dogs all of my adult life - mostly retired greyhounds. They are master creators of ritual! If something is supposed to be done a certain way, and I don't do it that way - I get "the look!" I can't begin to tell you just how reproachful a look a sighthound can give! :-)

And, in those moments when my dogs and I make that connection, there is a wonderful sense of peace, and a connection to more than just the dog!

Anyone else?

Blessings,
Mary

I've often thought of going back to church, ANY church, during the winter just so that I can have that ritual each week. ( I camp and go to pow wows all summer - lots of spiriitual ritual there)
The more I think about it tho, it's more like I just want to be on hallowed ground rather than have to dress nice (I do that for work...) listen to someones sermon, be sociable and be perfuncatorily asked to give money. Though it would make my mother VERY happy if I went to church again (I haven't been since I was little). It's just the thought of being in a house of god that seems relaxing.

Boy, I've asked this question, myself, on a different Discussion Board!

A part of me wishes for some ritual for "grounding", especially since Earth is my weakest element. Yet, most times, I find rituals devoid of meaning and spiritual connection for me. They turn into empty attempts to reach the Divine.

So while I like the thought of incorporating a specific ritual, I'm realizine more and more (like mtnmermaid alluded to) that everything can be a spiritual ritual if I am mindful and aware. It seems the minute I try to "ritualize" or freeze something into a practice, it begins to lose its meaning for me. So then, day by day, I pay attention to all that I do (or try to, anyway!), and ask myself "What's the lesson here? What is God saying to me?"

Good questions, Mary!

It seems the minute I try to "ritualize" or freeze something into a practice, it begins to lose its meaning for me.

^^
Yes!, For myself also it seems that if I try to ritualize something it "cheapens" what I am trying to do. As if even though it's just myself, that I'm putting on a show just in case I get walked in on.
Not that I am embarassed...not in the least bit, but at the same time I figure the creator knows what Im doing and so do I why should I have to go through all these steps to validate doing it?

I will admit to praying alot in the car though, tis where I get the best thoughts going <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Wendy

I agree with what you are feeling. It's one of the reasons I found both of these books so helpful. Fulghum shows that the best public rituals are those that are natural extensions of our daily lives. And Sylvan gives some wonderful ideas for rituals that don't feel "forced" to me at all.

One of her suggestions has to do with (and I'm paraphrasing here, with apologies to the author!) just thinking about and giving thanks to all the beings and things that gave in some way to provide food for us.

Saying "grace" is something I grew up with, and it never meant much to me. How fast it was said had a lot to do with how hungry everyone was. It's a little better when my sister has everyone at her holiday table say what they're thankful for, but that can feel forced, too.

I try to just think about what I'm eating. What the ingredients are, how they came to be, if an animal gave its life for me (we still eat seafood, unhappily) or lived an unnatural life to provide dairy or eggs for me. I think about the plants growing and being harvested, and about all the people involved all along the way.

When I do that - and I don't always remember - I feel that the food is nourishing more than just my body.

I guess what I'm saying is that any "ritual" that makes me more mindful is a useful thing, and, if done right, doesn't have to feel "ritualized" to death! :-)

Blessings,
Mary

Janet,

Anything CAN be a ritual. You don't have to stop your daily routine to performa ritual, you can make bits of your daily routines be the rituals.

I find tending my houseplants to be very grounding. As a city dweller, it's easy for me to feel not very connected with the Earth. Tending things that grow in dirt is very connecting for me. I touch the dirt to see if the plants need water. I smell it because it reminds me of outside. I look at the leaves to see how the plants are growing. And just those simple things leave me feeling grounded and connected to the Earth.

Hi all!

Ritual usually means "A detailed method of procedure faithfully or regularly followed".

What we're talking about, in my opinion, is mindfulness. That is, bringing/finding a sense of sacredness in daily acts.

Just a thought. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Just a sidetracked rambling...but I do so love the smell of the soil when I water my plants with warm water...