Here's a fairly simple online test:
Online BiPolar test I took it myself, it does say that you can take it on behalf of someone else, but a few of the questions are "how do you feel?" type questions - so it is more accurate if he takes it.
At one point in time I was hospitalized for suicidal thoughts. I self-admitted, because I had already had an uncle commit suicide, and I did not want to put my family through that again. I actually have both Depression and Bi-Polar 4, which tends more to the Depressive side. My manic phases tend to be more irritable and angry than happy and excited. I spend more out of guilt - most of my spending is done on my kids than on myself. My big addiction is food.
I learned while in the hospital that people self-medicate for depression in all sorts of ways. Also that almost all addicts at the core are suffering from depression of some sort or the other - but some are very, very good at hiding it. When my psychiatrist met me he said I had the best "mask" he had ever seen. I told him it was my proper Southern Lady upbringing. You don't show when you are upset. "How are you?" is not a request for a person's health down here, it is a way of saying "hello". If you have problems - you keep them to yourself (unless you are 70 - then you can talk for hours about your failing health and it is only polite for everyone around to stand and listen, LOL!)
Your husband is self-medicating and holding his mask on by doing it. Until he stops, he'll never crack and have a reason to face his Depression. The insidious part of spending/debting is that a person doesn't
show symptoms the way an alcoholic or drug addict does. And like you said, hitting rock bottom often takes the entire family down with them.
When you talk to your lawyer, see if there is anyway to cut him off. He needs to have his access to money taken away just like an aolcoholic or drug addict in rehab as their access cut off. He needs his crutch jerked out from under him so that he has no choice but to face that he is the one out of control.
As for you being out of control - you're not. You are taking control. You are facing everything head on and trying to find answers and solutions. Hopefully you will hear from some others that have been/ are in the place you are - but for the time being I hope you will accept the support from others on this forum.
