Hey there everyone, I just thought I'd ask this to see what comes back to me. I've always been offended by some things people say in response when they learn you do not wish to be a parent. Especially if you are a woman and you say you have no desire to be a mother. It seems as though most people still think that's every woman's goal in life. So I just thought I'd ask this: What are some of the most idiotic, annoying, offensive, funny or cliched responses you've gotten from people once you tell them you're not planning to have any kids? And why?

I'll say mine. The most irritating and offensive reply that I get when I say I don't want to have any kids would probably have to be "You'll change you're mind when you get older." It's something I'm sure we've all heard at one point or many points in our lives, so it kind of becomes an annoying mantra after a while. The reason it bothers me so much is because it's like people who tell you that are saying you lack the mental capability to make a proper choice on your own because you're young and even more offensively, it implies that you'll one day see the error of your ways and turn into a real adult by wanting to be a parent.

We've covered this topic here in the past, so I know you are going to get some great responses.

Here is what annoyed me the most when I would hear it:

"You become selfish if you don't have children".

Oh see, I didn't know...sometimes you have to go pretty far back in the list of posts to find something similar. I figured that it may have been done before though. I know...kinda unoriginal

I've heard them all, but my newest most annoying one is when I tell people I'm not having kids and I've had my tubes tied, then I get back "They can undo that" or some variation there of.

Really? REALLY? It makes me want to go in there, rip out my ovaries, hold them up for all the world to see and yell, "UNDO THIS, @#$%^&*!!!"

Women who don't want kids don't really need their ovaries for anything...why can't they just remove the whole damn thing like they do when they fix a dog. They'll remove a cat or dog's reproductive organs with out any qualms when they're but a few months old, but for whatever godforsaken reason they won't even preform a surgery to tie a woman's tubes when she's an adult who's fully capable of making her own decisions.

And what reason do vets and Humane Society professionals have for taking out the reproductive organs of an animal? To control the population! For god sake, we'll worry about over-population of every godforsaken animal on this planet except ourselves!

P.S. ---Doyln...Still dying from laughter at your comment!

Damn right! In the past I didn't mind getting my period, but lately, I REALLY hate it and dread it! I really do, and I'm not regular! But when I do, I have painful periods with ALL the symptoms 2 weeks before and 4 days of the actual thing, so I suffer during almost 3 weeks. Every time, I think "why do I have to go through this if I don't even want kids?" I can't wait to have menopause - I'm actually wishing for an early one!!

Anyway, back to the topic. I'm lucky in that ppl around me have respected my choice and I've never gotten a nasty comment. I've actually had a lot of ppl backing me up. But, a comment I would definitely not like is if someone told me that I would regret it. That would be very offensive.

gullivera ...I know! I am almost exactly like that. My stomach cramps for a week before the main part ever starts and then it's even worse. I seriously am in unrelenting pain for around 2 and a half weeks! I have to take 4 ibprofen every couple hours to even make it bearable. But if I go to any doctor and ask if they can just tie my tubes and end the suffering, they laugh at me! No one will even consider it at this point because I'm only 21 and it's ridiculous I have to be in this amount of agony for no reason. Actually, that's another of my most annoying reactions that I get to saying things that even indicate I don't want to have kids.

When getting my taxes done, the employee asked me if I had children. I said "No." She then in turn asked me "What's your problem." I so wish my husband was with me so he could put her in her place. Luckily that business does not exist any longer.

My favorite is "Why?" or better yet: "WWWHHHHYYYYYY??????" This is always coming from a stranger, so its extra funny. My usual response is "Do I know you?" Seriously, its an incredibly personal question. I will discuss this with good friends and family members, maybe. Certainly not with some medical assistant I have never seen before or again. Secondly: REALLY? Can you not think of ONE good reason why someone maybe didnt want a child? I might as well say the sky is green: people are INCREDULOUS about someone not wanting a kid. Like somehow what I really meant to say is "Yes, I want a kid" but mixed up Yes with NO. Hilarious sometimes!

Someone asked how long I had been married, I said two yrs. (this was a long time ago), and he asked if I had any kids....I said 'no and I'm not going to have any'. He asked why, and I said because I didn't want any. His response was 'well, that's very selfish'. This was a total stranger. I was young and naive at the time. Believe me, if anyone said that to me today I would give them a piece of my mind...in no uncertain terms.

We were at a social event last evening. A new aquaintence asked if I have any children ...I said "no, my kid is (insert house address which is our winter home)'......cause if I had kids I certainly wouldn't be able to own two residences! Anyhow, this was quite an elderly lady who also happens to be childfree.....we had a good laugh.
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Most annoying response...probably "Oh well you don't know that" or "You'll change your mind later" Those are responses that always pi$$ me off. Not only is it condescending but it's like they've totally disregarded all your years of thinking and searching as nothing more than a whim. All the years I spent pondering over whether I wanted kids or not, has be shoved aside and my choice colored the shade of youthful whimsy. I'm not that short sighted or whimsical that I'd make this type of decision so lightly, and people brushing it off as such is nothing more than a total lack of respect.

Cream pie- I hear you! Isn't it more selfish of a complete stranger to walk up to Someone they don't even know and upon learning that they don't want kids, act like they should have kids for the sake of some stranger?! People don't find that reasoning selfish in itself?

Jennifer B.- my reasons exactly. I find that phrase both condescending and unreasonable. They don't know me, what right do they have to tell me what will or will not happen later in life.

I actually really like this question from people because I can really mess with minds if it's a stranger. I love to spin horrible tales of illness, death and disfigurement. It freakin' serves them right for asking such personal questions of a stranger.

People who know me even remotely, only ask this question once. I tell them working for years with critically ill children made me realize how terrible the world is and that I don't want to bring new children into it.

I don't get asked about it much but I would usually get the you'll change your mind bit. Most of the time if I get asked if I have kids or not is when I work with new coworkers I haven't worked with before. They usually ask just to make conversation.

A small number might ask why and when I tell them I have no desire they usually don't say anything else. Because of the nature of our job (I travel a lot about 3-6 days out of the week) they understand the difficulty of having young children with what we do.

Usually my coworkers are young and don't have children yet or they are older and have grown children because it's easier to be away from home with our jobs.