BellaOnline Forums Beauty and Self Stress Management What is your stress level today?

My stress level is low today. Stress level rises when I have several articles to write and they are due the same day.

Stress level is up. It seems that I can't go too long before another challenge comes up. This particular one has my stomach all in knots. I woke up at 3:30am and I can't go back to sleep because I am thinking about it....

Debbie -

I'm awake too because of nervousness. Today will be a challenging day for me - I don't like crowds and it will involve crowds.

So I figured I'd come down and put up the "birthday of the day" so that was all set. One less thing to have to do when I wake up.

Now the question is, how to fall asleep. My plan is to unroll my massage mat that I haven't used in years and years. My boyfriend's mother had given it to us. It has "rumble strips" in it. So I'll set that up and see if that helps.

Also, it helps to breathe in a soothing fragrance, to take long, deep breaths, and to tell yourself you'll focus on the issue in the morning. Remind yourself that you can trust your morning self to take care of it. Your current self's only task is to sleeeep .

Oh see, here I am using language poorly. We influence our brains with the language we choose to use.

So it's not that I don't like crowds. That is an unhelpful mindset for me to have .

I will do fine with the crowds. I will enjoy being in the crowd, because it is a proud day that I worked for. I'll tell you guys all about it later tonight. So the crowd will be fine, and I will be fine.

I am getting better with crowds every month. One step at a time.

Lisa......take a deep breath later before you start and you should be ok in the crowd. If you are speaking, look above their heads and address the wall behind them. It may help and they will never know.

My stress is anticipatory stress. Later in the week my departed boyfriend's 11 yr old daughter will be here to visit with her grandparents who she has not seen since Christmas, even though she does not live far away. The mother is at fault for this, and is pushing the daughter to go through her father's things here in the apartment, instead of focusing on seeing her elderly grandparents. I am stressed because I live here and my stuff is all around too, and I don't want the emotional upheaval of pulling stuff out from everywhere to go through it.

I have a lot going on myself with trying to find a job and going through items I just emptied out of my storage unit. I am also still in my healing process. If I thought the daughter really wanted this I would not be so stressed, but the mother is pushing the issue. She is a very aggressive person. I just wish the mother would have respect enough to go through everything after I move out of the in-law apartment in a year or two. I really think this is a family matter and I don't want any part of it, especially the emotions of it all when I am trying to move on.

Today I am more angry than stressed. My parents had a lot of fun today laughing right in my face and they look most happy about their excellent work.

It's a little higher today, I am thinking of the big day that is coming next week.

I'm still stressed about my big day coming up but it's less today.

Dear Debbie -

Thank you so much for your advice. My trip to New York City went quite well! My father and boyfriend were wonderful in taking care of me and nurturing me along. I had to go on stage twice to receive my awards and I didn't faint. So I am taking the small victories. My Dad went on stage with me to be with me, so that helped. I am OK with taking tiny steps.

I tried my best to relax the night before, but I didn't get much sleep. I did find the soothing scents helped a lot.

Interestingly if I look at the photos from the event now I still feel a bit of stress. So even thinking about the memory can bring on stress. So that is something I need to work on. It's silly to have harmful stress hormones in my body because of something in the past! .

Dear Debbie -

I'm sorry that you are having that stress pushed on you. Hopefully the time goes smoothly and it is about gentle remembrances together. Think of this as your opportunity to help be a role model for her, it sounds like she could use one.

Good luck with the organization process. That can be quite cathartic.

Lisa