BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Random Moments when you're thankful you are CFC!

[quote=misstalia]Sam and Cassie, I notice this as well. Often the dads look fine and well put together while the mother is at an unhealthy weight, and often seem to take no pride in appearance. [/quote] You made me think of how in the 50s it was expected that mothers would always have to look presentable in public. Well dressed, make up, hair done etc. Now days they look bedraggled, tired, over worn. Makes me think of those moms on Toddlers and Tiaras. That have let themselves go but would spend the moments making their children look good. Sam, I'm sorry that you are in the situation. Try not to let it get to you. Only you and your other half know the real you. xox.

Sam, it shouldn't prevent you from making friends. You don't even have to discuss it. I think that what happens in some friendships is that one has a child and feels defensive that their child free friend doesn't want what they want or maybe the friend with a child simply becomes jealous of the various freedoms the child free by choice (CFC) friend may have. Most of my friends have kids, and you know it does take up their time, but that's why it's important to also have CFC friends in addition. Maybe try not discussing it when making friends. Not that you're trying to be something you are, just because it's a personal choice that you need not discuss. Eventually, your friends may have kids, but when they see that you don't they'll know.

Reason # 235600, I'm grateful to be CFC: My husband and I enjoying a quiet home cooked candlelit dinner with a good bottle of wine.

Absolutely, I'm selfish, greedy and lazy.. why the hell would I want to burden a woman with all that work.. no kids for me !!

Two of my current reasons for being thankful I'm not having kids: One- I am so fed up with the family gatherings where all they talk about is Brett's Sister's new baby. (Brett is my fiancee's Sister's husband.) First of all, I despise "new baby" talk. All the "It's so CUTE!", "Oh my god that's such an adorable outfit"!, "I want pictures!", blabber. By the end of each gathering, I find my last nerve has been grated upon to the point that I snap at my fiancee about every little thing. I know I shouldn't, because it's not his fault, and I always apologize and feel really bad afterward. The last gathering that I sat through, I ended up spending the whole time watching football with the guys. Because I couldn't sit at the table and "oh" and "aw" over some baby I'd never even met and frankly have no interest in. What was I supposed to say? "Cute, though I've never even met it before. Oh, and I don't even like or want kinds anyway." I don't think so. Two- I don't know if anyone on here has Facebook, but I do. And if there is one moment I am really thankful I'm not having kids it's when I see all the "mommies" that have a picture of their baby/infant/toddler or child as their profile picture. It's like they're saying the ONLY thing in life is that child. I for one, do not want a child who does nothing but cost me money and a healthy relationship with my fiancee to be my entire life. Thanks, but no thanks.

I was sitting in a relatively nice restaurant today. A couple was sitting at a table with their young baby. The mother had the squirming infant in one arm, and with the other arm she was trying to eat. Do you think the father took the baby for a little while? Oh hell no.

After a while the baby started to really fuss and cry, and I could see other diners whipping their heads around at the sound. Thankfully I was far enough away not to be disturbed by any of it, but I was darn thankful that it was not me trying to eat a decent meal with a baby in my arms and an unhelpful hubby....

It's a tremendous sacrifice to have children -- my grandmother was abused, and that messed up my mom's head with low-self esteem. But, they did have some pointers.

1) You have to know who you are.
2) You have to know what you can offer in the form of instruction of how to act and live.
3) You have to have stable income.
4) Love is Work spelled backwards.
5) You have to be selfless

There is such a disparity between sex and love in this society that I chose to be childfree and wait to see if this civilization blows itself up or is able to establish and maintain a golden age civilization and culture.
I know reincarnation is a fact, and the reason that God allows such suffering and torment is because his mercy extends to the fallen ones as well.
Nobody really knows who is who in this battle of Armageddon, and sorry for diverging from the main subject but I think that the guy who made the microchip baby and gives it to high school students to see if they want that kind of responsiblity is heading in the right direction.
Love, Romance and Sex is selfish and is ramped up to sell products. It can be very spiritual and everyone is seeking that perfect union. It is really a seeking for God and very few find it. We all melt when a solid marriage is portrayed -- but this is not the reality on the ground. It takes everything you have and more to raise a child, then you could get very disappointed if they marry the ' wrong ' person.