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Joined: May 2010
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I don't have to share the blankets because I hog them all in my sleep. ;)

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I'm trying to understand what being single to me is. Being able to not depend on someone for support is a good thing. Independence teaches me how to love myself. I still have a ways to go, but I'm trying. I'm going to college, I own a home, but something seems to be missing, what I'm trying to say is, should I just completely focus on my goals,and work for materialistic things? I feel like I'm in a rat race with a bunch of other people ready to cut each others heads off, then again I could be wrong. But I was thinking about the cars people drive and somehow gaining some type of "social status" by that car. I know I'm competitive, but I really don't like living like that. I mean is this supposed to be some kind of game I'm supposed to enjoy?

Joined: Jul 2010
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I've been single again for almost four years now and while I miss my late husband I have to admit that I have grown a lot by being on my own. My life is rich. I have plenty of family and friends. I travel solo and love it. I'm dating again. We'll see whether I ever decide to partner up again.

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This 3 day weekend is mine - all mine - and I love it that way. It is a writing/cooking/jewelry making retreat.

When I was married or even dating - I seemed to be the kind of person that will give up "themselves" to make the other person happy.....



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I'm married and I do give in to what everyone else wants most of the time. Sometimes, it is because I don't have a preference in the situation; other times, it is because I want to see the other person happy.

But there are times, like tonight, when I made a decision that he did not like and I stuck to my guns, he was clearly annoyed. Why can't we just respect each other's choices even when we don't agree with them? I'm dog-sitting for a friend and did not want to leave the dog to go to the gym with him. I feel that I took on the responsibility while he feels the dog can be left alone just fine. We're both right but I wanted to do what I wanted to do and now I feel as though I disappointed him. It is not a good feeling.

So there are perks to being single. Not having to compromise over every little decision is one of them!

Joined: Sep 2010
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I can feel your frustration, I am re-married and share my dog of 9 years with my X wife, my x and I get along fine now. She is re-married like me end everything is OK. My new wife battles with me everytime I get my dog for a few days about 2-3 per month. I will NOT give up my love for my dog for anyone,animals are wonderful and do not make life hard for us. If the cards were turned, I would be fine with her and the dog if it made her happy.At this moment, being single again would be very nice.

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Good for you for sticking to your guns about your dog!


Robin Rounds Whittemore
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Mark, it seems that your new wife views your dog as a sentimental remnant of your first marriage.

And when you say you won't give up your love for your dog for anyone, it makes it clear to your new wife that she is second in your life.

This would make any wife very insecure. And yet, I can understand how you feel. I feel for you because it's not an easy situation for any of you.

The solution would be to find a way for your new wife to bond with your dog. She's very immature to take out her insecurities out on an innocent dog, though. Gosh, who can't love a dog? No matter who it belongs to? A dog has room in his heart to love lots of people!

If anything happened between my husband and me, I would not remarry. I can't imagine having to go through all the adjustments with a new partner!

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It dissapoints me that she doesnt get it. she doesnt want me associated with my X but we get along fine and her husband and I get along great. If you have trust everything should be fine.We only talk talk to when it has to do with the dog.

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Originally Posted By: Mark J
If you have trust everything should be fine.


Hmmm. You pinpointed the problem.

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