BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Course - Sociology of Familiy SOC 410-01

I did mention to close friends at University that I wasn't keen to have kids - most were understanding but thought I'd change...
I'm actually with Duane on this one - I would have been reluctant to state my view in class at 18 or 22 - I wouldn't have left the room but I probably would have watered down my views to something like, "I'm not sure really"....When deep down I was VERY sure...
I would have felt uncomfortable debating such a personal matter in an open forum - particularly, an open hostile forum.

thedopespot,
That's something you might want to consider. I'm a little worried about what might happen when she has these discussions about the CF "phenomena". It sounds like you might get attacked standing alone against the rest of the class. I hope there are others who are supportive of you there, or maybe there should be some guests in class that day who are CF. Be careful. I hope it goes okay.

As a point to remember when people starting being judgemental...what about people who are infertile? Are they lesser human beings? Not pulling their weight in society? Those people need to WATCH what they say, because it's a sensitive subject, and can be a medical issue for some people. What if they said some of that [censored] to an infertile person and made them seriously depressed? Badgering people about it is very rude, and that professor really needs to WAKE UP. UG! I don't know how I would handle it if I were you, really, but probably not very well because it makes me very mad and screechy, and I would have trouble staying calm.

Good luck.

I actually had a memory remnant from HIGH SCHOOL! I remember being in some class (Spanish or something like that) and we were asked (back in the early 80s) for general discussion, what we envisioned our family/kids in the future to be like. I remembered feeling scared $H!+less for a moment, and then I just lied and said "I don't know." -- even though I knew that I did not want any children.

I'd suggest re-reading this forum to see the various arguments that we give in response to the pro-child peoples. You'll need all of the arguments at the tip of your tounge, methinks.

I wish you luck.

thedopespot~

Welcome! I've been off the board for a few days (and everyone can tell you how rare that is), or I would have greeted you sooner. I was shocked to read about that prof. pushing her pro-natalist ideals in that manner and in that forum. I'm glad you confronted her about it, but I admit to bearing some apprehension on your behalf about the coming CF lectures. I'm not sure I'd trust her not to put you on the spot and go on a bingo tirade.

Wouldn't it be fun if you could get all the regulars of this board to audit the class for a week or two? It'd be fun for us, at least. She'd probably throw us out when she realized the whole class would see that CF people are thoughtful, intelligent, giving, perfectly normal human beings. Also, we're a chatty bunch; she'd never have a chance to talk...

*2nd Update!*

Alright folks, so I just got back from my second Sociology of Family class of the week and, as promised, my professor decided to discuss the �childfree phenomenon� in our Tuesday and Thursday classes.

On Tuesday, she began class by giving us some numbers and percentages of the growing childfree demographic. She differentied what it meant to be �childfree� rather than �childless�. She also spoke about the DINK lifestyle and all that came with it. Then she once again asked the class why they felt they wanted to have or did not want to have children. Unexpectedly, after her introduction to the topic, a good number of the students said they weren�t so sure that they �definitely� wanted kids. One girl actually said �Methinks I want to be a DINK!�

Today, we had some surprise guest speakers. There were two couples, one was a married couple with 4 children, and the other couple was married and childfree. They spoke about their respective lifestyles and then answered questions from the class.

This week�s classes were a ton of fun. I just wish some of you guys could have come in and backed me up with your razor sharp intellect and humor.

Great job thedopespot!

It's always a good sign when people start to question the life script and make informed and rational decisions about their lives. Looks like you opened her eyes and that of the other students.

Btw....we're not DINKs anymore, we're now called THINKERs (Two Healthy Incomes No Kids Early Retirement).

The guest speakers would have been fun. Two opposite sides of the coin, two diametrically opposed views - it's great that people in the class got to see that. So often, they don't - and many of them are surprised afterwards to find that they had a choice, after all.

Although why supposedly intelligent people can't work that out for themselves is beyond me ...

Thanks for the update! Looking forward to hearing more!

Thanks for the update! It sounds like that is what a class like that should be there for -- give other points of view, learn the pros and cons, and then make a decision.

If for any reason, the young people there discovered that yes, they DO have a choice, even if they do choose to have children, they have been exposed to the choice.

I've been wondering about how things would go for you all week, thedopespot! I'm glad things went well. Aparently your professor learned something too.

I've been busy this week, but watching this thread. I'm glad your prof somewhat redeemed herself. How old is this woman, just curious? I can't believe she spouted such negative opinions. As someone else said, a million arguments have been made on this board already regarding not having kids. But for her to say we are selfish, and we owe the country offspring??? That's just weird. Last time I checked, we weren't in a population crisis. Well, if we are, it's the opposite type of crisis, and people should be encouraged to be sterilized.

If someone doesn't feel geared toward parenting, they are going to resent it. And, if it doesn't interest them, how are they going to be as parents? I can tell you I know so many parents that aren't enthralled with parenting. And they probably end up producing future criminals b/c their kids feel horrible about themselves. Her logic is extremely short sighted. I'm shocked.