Jen,
Since it is already a birthday celebration, have you thought about sending all of the balloons to your dad after the party? You could take sharpies and write notes to your dad and maybe your brother too... and send them off at the end of the party. It would allow your daughter to celebrate her birthday knowing it is all about her and special day, and then you both will be able to honor and remember your dad when the time comes without having this loom over you all day wondering what to expect.
I love the idea of serving his favorite dessert or drink too... these little things that have such meaning can heal your aching heart in tiny ways.
Whatever you decide to do, my advice is that you make a plan of some kind. With a plan, you can put a mental hold on it, knowing that you have made time later to mourn your family.
I hope you are doing well.
Corinne
