It's often easier said than done correct? But you need to look deep within yourself and discover the person you know you should be. You cannot blame your difficult childhood on this hardship; if anything you should be more determined to live your life your way, doing whatever it is that makes you happy. I, too, was naive and hopeful, and it got me nowhere for 3 years, but in all honesty, the best thing I ever did was remove myself from the situation. You are hurt and alone, and noone can make that better but yourself. Do not concern yourself with financial issues, or the idea of hurting him, because he appears to have no regard for your well-being. Speak with your landlord, be honest and upfront, tell them you must leave, and they will work with you. People have a general care and concern for others, they will try to help you. Next thing, join a church, a community program, a support group, a cooking class, anything you can. You will not only find comfort in knowing people, but could find the man of your dreams. Try joining the local Jaycees, or Big Brothers Big Sisters, etc. Sometimes the best gratification comes from helping others. You have it in you to be the person you want yourself to be, it's just a matter of finding the strength to do it. I wish you the best of luck, and please, follow your heart, you know what it is telling you to do : )
