BellaOnline Forums Relationships Single Life Past Relationships

Let's take a trip down memory lane.

Which of the following best describes your last relationship? multiple choice
	A lot of great times that I will remember fondly.
	Many lessons learned.
	At least it's over now...
	I still miss it.
	Relationship? What relationship?
Votes accepted starting: 04/15/06 09:56 PM
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Well it looks like we're willing to learn from our mistakes! That's a great thing!

The biggest lesson I learned in my last relationship is not to date someone that you feel you don't deserve. It's a red flag that you've gotten out of touch with yourself and how great you are!

What lessons have you learned?

Many lessons learned.

lesson learned: don't ever enter into a relationship when you don't love the person. you'll eventually get tired of the person. and have a difficult time accepting him/her for what he/she is.

that is so true... I know I've been down that road more times than I care to count.

Lesson learned: follow your gut. If you have a gut feeling that something is wrong, believe it. (When my ex and I first got together, I had a feeling that he wasn't really into ME, just that I was into HIM and he latched onto that and thought he loved me (in the end, I'm pretty sure I was right). I had a bad feeling about him and one of our friends and brushed it off as me just being insecure. A few days later we were splitting up so he could be with her. Those were only two of the biggest incidents of me having a bad feeling about something in our relationship and being right)

TRUST YOURSELF! If you have a bad feeling about something, at least be on your toes for any indication that you're right, even if you don't want to act on the feeling right away. You know more than you think you do, and if something in you is trying to tell you something's wrong, trust that.

Ditto Katja! My last relationship ended up with me and this guys girlfriend of a year and half finding out about one another and OTHERS he was seeing. Turns out this guy was a full blown Psycopath!...I had a feeling, but didn't listen....at least my heart was guarded.

ItzMissE--How did you and the girlfriend become friends? And how did you both find out about the other women?

For me, I always make a practice of checking a guy out if I am going to get serious with him and it can really pay off sometimes.

do a background check...it pays off

In my case, I found out because my ex was stupid--loooooooooooooooooooooooong story short, "the other woman" was a mutual friend of ours...one weekend our whole group of friends were together and she and he were flirting a lot, which they'd never done before, and in the looks that kept passing between them I just got the feeling they had this secret between them (I liken it to the way your parents would give each other meaningful looks over your head when you're a kid). Then the next weekend the group was together (I wasn't) and after everyone else left, she "had" to spend the night at his place because she supposedly couldn't stay with someone else, which I found fishy in light of what I'd seen the previous weekend. A couple days later I told him that him spending the night alone with other girls, even if they were "just friends," was not something I was comfortable with and all of a sudden he clammed up and started shutting me out, then finally said we needed to break up. Then not long after that I saw them together.

IOW, he sort of dug his own grave because it was his acting guilty that clued me in.

Alexa---He wasn't very good at hiding it...well, he really didn't hide anything. He gave me his home phone, which I usually always called his cell...well one night I decided to call his house phone and she answered. At first I was going to deny it, but then I just said screw it and told her everything. He and I weren't seeing each other that long and she seemed like a really nice gal. In fact...her and I STILL talk and this happened back in January so I guess you could say we've become friends.

and you know what? I'm glad I didn't deny it...I've made a nice friend from it and we still talk and laugh about it all. She's thankful I did it however she still sees him (not as far as seeing him as in being in a relationship with him)but is still somewhat in his life. He is such a loser.

Wow... Does anyone have fond memories of a past relationship? Seems like there are a lot of cheating boyfriends out there...

How do you do background checks and is it real expensive?
How quick do you get the info back on them? Is it different in each state?

Unfortunately, background checks will only find out certain things...if he's only a total @ss, a background check won't save you. <img src="/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />