BellaOnline Forums Religion and Spirituality New Age Energy vampires

LOL you are soooo right <img src="/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

This discussion was sorely needed- we all have those folks we want to love better, but dread seeing because they just drain us thoroughly. I have a dear friend who's the stay at home mom of two young children, and her home is chaos. You are all right- her vampiric tendencies are definitely of the "rescue me from my life" kind. She is ultra needy. Another friend and I try to regularly bolster up our reserves and invite her out to "girls day out" even springing for a sitter if needed, just because we do love her.
Another kind of emotional vampire... know anyone who can just by sitting in a corner suck all of the joy out of a party? I'll bet everyone knows one of those too!

As Lauren rightly pointed out, it's a mental attitude that can be so insiduously debilitating... and one we personally have to build up a defence of some kind, be it a positive mental attitude and a refusal to be sucked dry, or an actual development of Wei Qi (protective energy, according to Chinese medicine) Wei Qi is controlled by the Metal channel, which is manifested through the organs of (yin) Lungs and (yang) Large intestine....

so deep breaths, and diaphragmatic exercises can increase this Wei Qi.

Either that, or passing wind could deter them...





DID I SAY THAT OUT LOUD - ??!!??

OH MY GOODNESS, hahahahahaha. Well ok then I will add that to my list but I wanted to point out that will not work if you are on the phone !!!!!

Oh Alexandra that did make me laugh! <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/rolling.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Trish's friend is a good example of someone that needs an energy feed because she's exhausted, but is worth helping, up to a point at least, as she's so nice. The sit in the corner & drain the joy type reminds me of someone that we nicknamed the 'Dementor' (Harry Potter creature) for this uncanny knack. She was a nice caring woman in some ways, but your energy plummeted when you saw her. <img src="/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

I can always be trusted to lower the tone..... <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Good <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> You are very welcome here <img src="/images/graemlins/queen.gif" alt="" />

I can't help but wonder how much of a "vampire" I was during my "bile black" periods of my depression.

I know I never conciously did this (because until your article I never thought about it.) But I do know that the depression had me completely exhausted - even not wanting to leave bed sometimes. It had to have worn off on at least my husband at times.

<img src="/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> It makes me feel bad that I did that, even unwittingly.

No wonder psychiatrists have such a high rate of suicide among their profession.

Gee, I've read right to the end of this thread and am wondering if I have unconsciously brought about the end of my relationship.

Is it possible for a partner to 'take on' all your pain, to the extent that they become drained and depleted, without your intending this to happen?

Is this type of thing to be expected where one partner is seriously and chronically ill for long periods of time?

I would never have wanted this to happen, but my partner says it did. I feel just terrible about that because it is something I would never have allowed, had I known it was happening. OR, could I have prevented it? My partner was one of those people who felt she had to protect me and 'save' me from her own fears and worries.

What can you do in a case like this? How can I stop this from happening again?

I'm no expert, but I think everyone's responsible for their own actions, so if your partner took them on (which I believe can happen), then he/she needs to take some responsibility.

That said, I've always called persons described by this article psychic vampires. My ex was a psychic vampire and suffered from a malady every single day I was with him. Every single day for ten long long years. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> He was a hypochondriac, but on top of that, his phony illnesses were a way to focus the relationship on him all the time. He was self-aware and was in fact the first person to tell me about psychic vampires. Oh, the irony?

I'm a strong woman and I don't need lots of attention, but after a while, I needed to nurture myself first. My happiness wasn't something he cared about.

No one else can define you or your own happiness, and I take that to heart every day. You need to go out and find it. It's easy to tell where it's NOT. If a situation or person is not meeting this basic need, you need to avoid it, and that includes family and job, unfortunately.

Once I cleared my personal space of this psychic vampire, I found a man who makes me happy every day with his humor and selflessness. Lots of things then fell in place, like a new job.

Moral of the story - avoid the energy zappers. =P