I think the masks are both helpful and harmful. When I talked to my therapist about it, she explained it to me pretty clearly. She said that the masks are what help us to survive daily. They are a protective mechanism for us. But, once we leave our abuser and are safe at last, then it is time for us to take the mask off, because at that point it becomes more of a hinderance, since it prevents us from allowing ourselves to confront and deal with past pains and traumas -- thus allowing healing to take place. So, I think it's both.
As for your post, Jenna, I know that many people say those things out of ignorance and their own fear. It's as though many in our society shroud themselves in secrecy and pretend that abuse really doesn't happen in our society. Like, if I can't see it, then it really isn't there. They pretend it isn't there in their own perception, so whenever the news shows a case of it happening, it is then followed with the attitude of, "Well, yeah it happened, but it's rare." What they forget is that it happened yesterday, the day before that, the day before that etc.
I'm pretty vocal with others now, as well, regarding abuse. One thing I don't stand idly by and listen to others speak out, are the comments like, "Well, why don't they just leave?" or "It's simple, don't let yourself keep getting beaten -- get out. It's your choice." or "get over it already, it's in the past. let it go." or "let go and let god."
Those are all things that I heard time and again. People speak them out in ignorance, but in reality, education should be priority here. Anyway, thanks for joining the discussion everyone. =)
