BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids What if you got pregnant?

I live in Kansas City and right now there is a heated debate about the state of Missouri providing transportantion to a pregnant prison inmate who wants an abortion.

The inmate is paying for her own abortion but it will take $350 of taxpayers' money to transport her to the clinic with two guards.

Some say the taxpayers shouldn't have to pay for that. I say that's ridiculous. What about the taxpayers paying for this unwanted child to be on welfare the rest of its life? I dare say that would be more expensive. Also - her lawyers are arguing it is cruel and unusual punishment to force her to go through the 9 months of pregnancy and have a child she doesn't want. I would have to agree.

I'd probably end up having the baby <img src="/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> Don't get me wrong, I am ADAMANTLY pro-choice, but I don't think that I could abort a child of my husband's, (I know, probably sounds silly and sentimental.) I would argue like hell though for adoption <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Pets I agree. It would cost far more for her to have the baby and it is not fair to force her to have the child that she doesn't want when any other woman has the choice to have an abortion.

I'd have an abortion while DH got snipped. I am sure if abortions were to become illegal, I imagine it would be news first and then banned. During the interim, while freaking out over the loss of my own personal choice, DH would make appt for vasectomy ASAP. We've been discussing it quite frequently lately. He definitely prefers I do not get tubes tied as it more invasive than vasectomy. It's a big deal for my sweetie-pie to cut the cord, and I don't want to rush him. We are alot like turtles.

Tell the cells to enjoy a few days of uninterrupted division before their introduction to Mr. Surgical Vaccuum.

Honestly, I have nightmeres about this at least twice a month. Especially with the threat of Roe v Wade being overturned. It is definitely a concern for the child free community. Accidents happen.

Kim
MNK Editor

At 19 I was in an abusive relationship, got pregnant and got an abortion. He had the nerve to tell his friends and afterwards they verbally harrassed and threatened me about it. After the abortion I broke up with him and had to get a restraining order against him and his friends. If I had had a baby with him I would have never gotten out of that relationship. I don't regret it.
I'm now happily married to a wonderful man and we've talked about what we'd do if we accidentaly got pregnant. We decided that we'd have the baby and we'd be happy about it (after the shock wore off).
I'm a strong pro-choice advocate and President Bush in power scares me! Christians preach the bible but tend to forget the part that says "Thou Shall Not Judge". I truly believe that God gave us brains for a reason...to make rational decisions. The result of those decisions is between God and the individual and NOBODY ELSE! Not everything is black and white. Whether we like it or not there are many gray areas in life. I recently heard about a 12 year old girl who was raped and now pregnant with her rapists baby. These conservative laws do not take into consideration gray areas!
Ghandi once said, "I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. They are nothing like your Christ."
Personal issues such as abortion and gay marriage have no business being political issues. Voters deciding your personal life choices for you is not a Democracy!
I pray that everyone in the world doesn't think all Americans are ignorant religous conservative bullies. I for one am embarrased by them all.

Hi Lynnk,

Not me! But my thoughts on sterilisation have changed a lot over the years. I asked my parents for a hysterectomy for my 21st birthday but there was no specialist in Australia that would do it at the time. In hindsight I'm quite glad about that, basically due to the fact that I have a brother who desperately wants a child one of these days and if for any reason his partner could not carry a child of her own, I would hope that I would have the courage to carry one for them so that's the only reason I've kept all my inny bits.

Hi Kimkenney

I have nightmares about it too! In fact ever since my husband and I were married almost 3 years ago and apologies if this is too much information for some readers but I've really gone off the whole sex thing. For some reason I'd always thought that when you're not married if you got pregnant by accident, it's understandable if you decided to abort but now being married if i decided I did not want to keep the baby I would be considered a monster. So now, instead of enjoying the bonding experience, I'm always too preoccupied wondering and worrying if my contraception is going to work properly. I've heard all sorts of horror stories about women on the pill still getting pregnant and it scares me to death! My husband is obviously very hurt by my lack of interest and me wanting to take more than one precaution. His view is, if it happens it was meant to happen and we'll just go ahead and have the baby but sadly because of his views, he would probably be the one person I would never tell for fear he'd try and force me to go through with it. I know that sounds nasty and terribly deceiptful but self-preservation and all that, I have to do what's best for me. As a result I try to avoid intimacy just in case my luck runs out. I feel so sorry for my husband because he never signed up for this type of baggage.

if i got pregnant, i'd definitely keep the child and love it. however, my first instinctual response would be shock. then i'm thinking perhaps anger (?- not sure if that's the right word, maybe resentment) that it finally happened NOW and not when we originally planned for it to happen (almost a decade ago). we're coming to peace finally with being cf, and we're realizing we're pretty comfortable just the two of us. although i'd be thrilled, i'd also be scared witless and worry what would happen with my marriage. so many of my friends with kids (all planned pgcies) are having marital problems now that the kids are here. i'm sure they were having some problems before the kids, but now they're being vocal when they never were in the past.