BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Something I dont Understand

And breeders didn't past some kind of test, either. There is no such thing.

There should be!! If such a test existed, there wouldn't be so many children who are abused, neglected and living in foster care. It kills me when I hear people who claim to want to be parents SO badly but if you suggest they adopt a less fortunate child who really needs a good parent, they will respond with "But, I really want to carry on MY bloodline, MY genes, MY family name..etc."
Who's the selfish one now?????

And that's the other stupid comment. I myself don't feel any desire to pass on genes. I'm going to die anyway and not know anything that happens afterwards, including seeing a child of my bloodline live the rest of his or her life.

Esp. since you never know how a kid will turn out--they might turn out to be the exact opposite of you and be everything you hate, or to be an ax murderer. Sure, that's the kind of legacy *I* wanna leave...

I have been going to a lot of forums Not all child related, a lot about Music, and everyday things. I have not went to a forum yet that has as much hate as some of these CF forums. It's like their is a whole racism againt Parents and children. Your making it into a "Black and white" thing almost. And in The parenthood forum I go to they dont just talk about the kids, they talk about life in general. (and seem much more positive and happy) And I doubt the reason that Parents dont talk about you is because you threaten their choice. Your really making yourself way more important then you are. I am freinds with CF people AND Parents, and a lot of those parents are classy individuals..So dont stero-type all parents as "Mindless child worshippers" It's like me saying all Black people are criminals.

I am child-free and okay with it. And I dont need to bring Parents down or make Parents look like Morons to feel that way.

I agree, D. While there are many intelligent people on this board, many are just as ignorant as the parents they complain about. Someone asked why I was here. I guess on some of these childfree boards, if you dare to say that parenthood is not a bad thing, you must be one yourself. I think parenthood is a wonderful thing, just not something that interests me. I do; however, think that people have just as much right to have kids as I have not to.

I joined this forum because it seemed like a place to support our decision not to have kids and to meet likeminded individuals. Unfortunately, many people use it as a place to write hurtful and offensive comments about children and parents.

If a childfree forum doesn't talk about living without children, then we might as well get on the cooking, gardening, travel, pets, motorcycles, fast cars, books, arts, etc forums. Because we are child-free we can surf anywhere we want about any subject, but some of us choose to post here because this forum deals specifically about being child-free.

While I agree there are people on childfree forums who are very negative towards children, I do not consider myself one of these people. I enjoy this forum because our whole society in general upholds parenthood as a good and positive thing and having no children by choice is not a good thing, and therefore, not discussed. So by childfree talking about what most parents will not discusss, we end up talking about parents with kids - not as a specific hate-target -but because society pushes childfree people in the "bad, selfish, cold, and unloving" category, and I personally do not like being thought of like this, even in a silent thought, whisper, or mumble-under-your-breath tone*.

I have never gone to a parenting forum. No thanks. You betcha they don't talk about people without children, why would they? They have children. They are the accepted way of life. They think they are completely right in having kids no matter how messed up their lives are. And a parenting forum is first and foremost on their minds when they do have the time to surf the internet. It makes sense they all end up talking about different subjects on the parenting forum. Poor parents, it's the only place besides work where they can get a blast of something that is not demanding almost all of their lives.

Childfree people on the other hand live without children. To some parents, we might as well live on Mars. I don't see a problem with people on this forum talking about parent versus child-free. Otherwise, let's just name this forum, Married and Child-free And Let's Not Discuss How This Status Effects Our Mental Health and Society in General.

*(cuz you know those people without kids, they don't know what it is to really love or live)

i totally agree with you O! it's hard enough being CF sometimes without other CF people complaining that we're being "negative" or "offensive". i can't believe that the parents on those forums never ever talk about CFers and even if they did so what? like i said i don't go on there b/c i'm not interested. just yesterday one of my best friends told me that her hubby's aunt(she has two kids) was grilling her when my hubby and i were having kids and if i was planning on getting pregnant that i better get going! so there's just one example of a parent talking about a with no kids! that is part of the reason i go to this forum. b/c of comments like that. like many of us we need a safe outlet for our frustrations,thoughts,or whatever else is on our minds. otherwise what's the point of having a forum like this! i believe that most of the people on here are great people and make it clear that they arent' talking about every parent in the universe. i happen to be one of those people.i have a lot of respect for parents and i do like kids(although i like dogs a little more)very much. i just like the CF lifestyle very very much. if you D don't like the comments or content of the forum again maybe you should think about posting somewhere else. i'm frankly getting sick and tired of you badgering people about their posts.
indigo

Personally, I don't think this board is nearly as hateful and negative as you say it is.

I've been on this forum for about a year now and I feel it is the most respectful one where CF'ers can post real issues and questions they are facing when dealing with the everyday non-CF world, and get someone's help who has been through it before.

I don't get into parent-bashing and have a live and let live philosophy. If this were one of those "Parents Are Mindless Child Worshippers" forums as you describe, I would not waste my time with it.

My CF decision was a traumatic one, and I have found some good resources on this forum and even joined a support group locally that I've been directed to from here. It has definatley been a bright spot for me. And of course there will be venting but there's alot of positive reinforcment, too.

Even parents post here from time to time and nobody berates them for having kids, that's just insane. You seem to be stereotyping everyone on this board as a parent-bashing ogre and as you say, that is like assuming all black people are criminals.

Post deleted by Lynnk