BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Childfree Marriage and Enjoyment of Sex

thats true..but some people think they can handle it...usually bringing kids into a relationship makes things worse

Loss of a sex life seems to be one of the most common problems for couples after they have children....and that's definitely a factor in my decision to not have kids (though not the only one of course). My husband and I have been together since college and our mutual appreciation of sex is probably my favorite part of our relationship:) I'm certainly not interested in making that potential sacrifice. Plus it just does such awful things to your body....yeesh. No thank you.

youre right it does do alot of things to your body, besides the fact that while some women are pregnant their husbands are no longer attracted to them because they've gained so much weight and continue to not be atttracted to them once the kid is out because the weight stays.....and stretch marks come in and things start going downward....

i think that kids are a big oppestal in sex life. and isnt that when couples start cheating. that is one way of geting it. leave the little mommy at home "work" longer hours so you can pay the bills and sleep with coworkers?!!! just a thought. my hubby and me have no kids and he has no reason to step out.HEHEHE

I think in a lot of cases men start feeling ignored (or actually being ignored) once a baby arrives on the scene. The baby becomes the center of the mom's universe and it's like "hey you did your part, Sperm Donor, now go away." I had a friend tell me, "you think you love your husband, but you don't know real love until you have your kids." I asked my mom about that and she said she loved us kids differently than she loves my dad....but not MORE. My friend has since divorced by the way - and yes, he cheated on her. My parents have been happily married for 37 years.

if you dont believe in miricals I wonder what they would call being married for 37 years kids or not!!! i just pray my hubby and i are together for that long

the husband feels he's not getting the support he needs so he pulls away...women have more maternal instincts, and some men are just dont have an emotional bond for their children but it doesnt men they dont love them..but alot of men leave the child-rearing up to the woman...and yet they go out and cheat because she doesnt have all the time for him she used to....but while he is out cheating he could be with her helping her out to take some of the load off her and being there for his children then she would have some time for him...but alot of women get caught up in the child for some reason..and its costing relationships to fail...there needs to be some kind of balance and comprimise

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That's the same as the guy saying "you're just not attractive anymore"--because she had his kid! Gah. Men.

I have a maternal instinct of sorts, it just doesn't run to children. I snuggle my kitties, and I'm very caring/protective toward my friends, family, and people I care about (at times to the extent of feeling overprotective in a motherly way; I caught myself today, while on the phone with my boss who was on the way down to Indy 500, telling him to make sure to drink a lot of water so he didn't get heat stroke and to put on sunscreen. Gah, I'm such a dork). I guess that's the extent of my "nurturing" side.

Yes.....I think 'Maternal Instincts' is too wide a term really, and often misused....It's like the term used for a man when he displays a modicum of sensitivity...
'He's in touch with his Feminine side' - WTF is that - ? Bulltosh....he's just being nice and appreciative - !!

There are many women who feel like Freespirit and others, who don't want kids, but who are pressured by all and sundry to bear children....So in addition to doing something they don't want to do, they further find it very difficult to 'bond' with their children, and subsequently feel very guilty about that, too.....

Stick to your guns, ladies, and do whatever is right of you....

As many of you will know, I have two daughters, and I love them to pieces - but Parenthood is not all it's cracked up to be...the small-print is illegible, and the contract doesn't live up to the promises.....

I'm living with a new fella now, having gone through a divorce, and the fact that we don't have children in our care - well, suffice to say, after 25 years of Motherhood, there's something quite liberating about it - !!