BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids List of Reasons Not to Have Children

"And stupid people can have sex, too. IQ is never a factor."

That reminded me of something I hear said at work a lot..."Even animals breed."

And about Pets4me's question of why people have kids...here's some of the reasons I've noticed:

*So the woman can quit her job & stay home
*Because all her/their friends are doing it
*Because their parents want grandchildren
*Because they (women) are afraid to go out into the big, bad world of work or schooling
*To "fix" their marriage
*To "keep" a man
*Because the birth control failed
*And the granddaddy of them all...because It's Just What You Do

Wouldn't having children make it less likely to stay home and not work? Children are expensive.

I don't know about anyone else but I cannot respect a woman who stays home and lets a man take care of her. I am too independent to do that, I take care of myself. I can't let my value be dependant on the worth of the man who takes care of me. To have to ask a man for money F*@# that.

Anyone coming to these boards and saying something as ignorant as "you were once children too" doesn't deserve any respect. They're obviously only here to get people stirred up.

Perhaps you are right bellringr. We all realize that we were once children. Duh, you have to be an infant, then child, then adolescent before you can be an adult. <img src="/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

But perhaps this person was trying to truly understand our perspective, even though these forums make it very clear. Or perhaps she was just trying to be the devil's advocate. If she was trying to get some of us stirred up then I guess it worked.

I can't really think of a rational reason TO have kids. Not one. I think this world sucks. I expect every day to see a mushroom cloud in the sky- we're so close to that it's not even funny- I don't want a kid to have to live through (or die from) that. I pray that my niece/nephew never know that in their lives. Why would I want to drag a kid through that kind of life when it sucks for ME to worry about this kind of stuff?

And furthermore, I think there are so many negative temptations in this society that it would be impossible to keep my child from it without screwing him/her up by over-sheltering! Look at 90% of teenage girls in the mall these days: pants down below their butt-cracks, bellies and cleavage sticking out of their skimpy, gauzy shirts, $100 hairdye jobs, carrying Coach handbags, on cell phones- with 90% of teenage boys checking them out! It's like you can't go anywhere get away from that!

This is not the American Dream anymore- it's American Hedonism.

(Oy- time for me to calm down....! ; )

Hey Kat1980!
Happy early birthday! Mine is in Christmas Day, (I'll be 26 this year....eek!) The 9101 isn't really signicant...it is part of an old phone number and it's just easy to remember. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I totally. The world sucks. It's not a child-friendly place at all.

I totally agree. The world is so bad that I just hope I die before the human race drives itself to extinction (or really heads in that direction).

All I can say is you got that right!!! I feel the exact same way. Unfortunatly, some women I know see nothing wrong with it.

It is not shame to share money! It is shame to be lazy, intentionally don�t work and then ask for partner�s money. But it is not shame to share your money together. Many men�s working position are much better paid than women�s, and women can�t even work many men�s work (such as construction etc.). Many works are also underpaid (such as government jobs), although they are valuable jobs. It is good to be self-confident for the case that You will split up, to be sure you can stay on your own, but as long as You are in relationship, it is not shame to share Your money. Is it shame to share your love together? Obviously not. And isn�t love more than money?

I re-write some words, which will express myself in most precious way.

�In my opinion, the first law of money should be part of the marriage ceremony itself: People first, then money.

Financial intimacy may be the most profound closeness there is. Many confide fears and painful stories of our pasts, and we certainly share our hopes and vision for the future. But to talk about money? Possible the last frontier of intimacy.

The two of you will be richer together, in every way, than you would be on your own. Two people contributing small sums of money, can build up a fortune much, much faster than one person. Two people working at it together can make a mortgage vaporize or send their children through school. Two people together create a life with greater depth and texture and richness than most of us can on our own. That�s what marriage or living together, at its best, is about and it implies a full commitment.

In some cases, your fortunes can grow by leaps and bounds if you both work, and learn to live on one salary. I have good friends who met and married when they were both thirty-five, knowing full well that the woman, an attorney, would always make more than her husband, who works for the city. Their decision? To live on her salary, which would provide a comfortable but not luxurious life for them together, and invest every single penny of his. That was twelve years ago, and today, they both know that within three years they will have enough money to live on comfortably forever if they no longer want to work. Their commitment was to each other and to their future, but it was their financial commitment to the marriage that built the fortune and made their dream materialize. No fine lines here of �yours�, �mine�, �ours.� It was all �ours�.

Or take the arrangements in which one party stays home and the other goes to work every day. Here�s another chance to build great fortunes, if that�s the direction the commitment takes. Only one set of professional clothes in this household, perhaps only one car. One salary keeps the family in a lower tax bracket, and the stay-at-home spouse, according to the couple�s agreement, cares for the house and the working partner can devote his or her full energy to making money. Old-fashioned? Maybe. But if it�s a whole-life commitment you�re talking about, and it makes domestic and fiscal sense, this can be the road to riches�.

<img src="/images/graemlins/easter.gif" alt="" />


The COURAGE to Be RICH by Suze Orman Page 155, 156

(I am sorry for very long post).