Thank you all for such wonderful responses! I would love to answer each of you individually, but with both of our laptops down, I'm using the iPhone which is rather time consuming.
It may seem as if I'm hanging on to the past and all of the negatives, and I can see how it can look that way! Truth is, I've always believed that everything is okay and that all happens in devine order. Then I got sick...I woke up to an influx of things that are going on in our country...and I got angry! I felt so nieve, used and valueless in society. The bottom dropped out of my life. But I have a strong spirit, and my anger worked as a refusal not to lay down and die. I would not let these negative forces take my life
away! My illness has been a wonderful gift in so many ways. It was my illness that
brought my soulmate into life.
We are now part of an amazing program that matches home seekers with home
owners who are in need of help. We are now living blissfully in an old farmhouse loft apartment with the owner, an enlightened woman and her beautiful dog who has adopted us as family, living in the main house. We pay a very modest rent and do yard work, haul and stack firewood, and any other help that she needs to care for her home and breathtaking 20 acres of wild land. Next week we will pick apples and share community time prepring them for apple sauce and apple butter. We live in perfect bliss on a country dirt road. But...always reminders of the lives we left behind... Good people suffering in bad city neighborhoods. "Beat Whitey Night", Black Panthers permitted to bully white voters-- it goes on and on. Then We see the element invading our peaceful state. You don't ever forget your past and those still living there...unless you seclude yourself completely from all the rest of society. We may be removed from it, but it still thrives.
If not for my hubby's and my strong spirits and belief in goodness, we would
not have created the lovely life that we have and cherish. But when one has been battered by illness due to environmental toxins; and the dark forces charging against the light, one grows weak, tired and vulnerable. In a sense,
jdefeated. But not bereft of all hope.
