I was just talking to my boyfriend tonight about his mother--she's a beautiful lady who wouldn't hurt a fly, but she can see no wrong in her children. At all! It's quite funny sometimes, because since I pointed it out, he notices and it's really obvious.
So if any of her children do/say/think anything she doesn't like, it's their spouse/significant other who caused it. Example: I've known him 3 years. I smoke. He smokes. She told him that I smoke and that's the reason he still smokes. He started when he was 12--almost 20 years before we met! But, obviously, he would quit if I didn't smoke. It's my fault he smokes.
Anyway, I said all that to say many parents have her exact way of thinking! They don't want to be mad at their kid, so they blame it on the in-law for influencing, changing, making their kid do something they don't like. It's CRAZY.
They think so little of their own children that they can't be trusted to have an opinion, make a decision, take a stand on their own? Or is it a misplaced ideal of love that if their kids love them, they'll never disappoint them and always do what makes mom & dad happy?
IMHO, the only people who need to be involved in the procreation decision are the ones who will birth, feed, shelter, clothe and educated said offspring. I would love to have grandchildren, but if my kids don't want to be parents, more power to them!
