BellaOnline Forums Beauty and Self Self Development Venting

Venting my sadness and my heartbreak has helped me. I feel that their are people who have listened and have been with me. what has been your experience with venting?

I need to vent about the mail service, i receive a lot of mail (freebies) magazines, catalogs, we have a mailman that doesn't deliver anything he doesn't feel is worth his while because of a hugh decrease in mail volume he was reported to the post office, he was put on another route, mail went back to normal, well this other mail man thru a friend told him i was the one to complain about him. now hes back on my route and doesn't deliver the smallest packages always leaves me a notice to pick up packages myself at the post office i in return call the p.o. to have the packages redelivered,yesterday i received a package that was bone dry on the outside but the inside stuff was soaking wet, now i feel my mail was tampered with and my safety is in question, i called the p.o. agin and was told how do they know the package wasn't tampered with after i received it, i told the man on the other end of the phone i wish someone would take this seriously, it was all over looked by the postal service, doesn't any one care, thanks for letting me vent

Hi cd, I'd love to hear more on how venting has helped you.

I think we are passionate human beings and as such it is part of our nature to share that passion with others, regardless of the emotion.

I equate "venting" with "expressing" what's in my heart. Sometimes what is in me really needs a safe place to come out.
Having someone I can vent to allows me to share what I'm going through and not feel alone. I guess we all have a desire to know that someone somewhere in this world really cares about us enough to listen. It makes me feel special

What I find interesting is how rare it is to find someone I can truly vent to who will let me talk and not judge what I'm saying. They must also be trustworthy. For example, if I'm struggling with a friend, I don't want someone to judge my friend, I just want someone to hear how I'm feeling.

There is a flip side to venting as well. It gives the "listener" a chance to show how much he/she cares. It is a time when we can choose to share our hearts with another and create a safe place where they can express their true selves. We give the invitation to be real. It allows the venter a certain level of freedom.

It may not be pretty at times, it may require a wad of tissue paper, but it can be a real and meaningful connection with another.

OK, I've rambled on enough...

By the way... it doesn't seem the same without you and Holly posting as much...I've missed you two!

I believe with my experience that we store a certain amount of emotions. Once we release that amount, we get free.

...Speaking of venting.... I was actually going to start a thread on something I feel like venting about! But I'll just do it here.

I recently got in touch with an old childhood friend and we've been sending eachother messages online.

She's done soo much with her life over the last 13 years or so. She's done a huge amount of travelling and gone to university and made so many friends around the world etc. And I was feeling a little like wow, I havent really done anything huge in my life thus far! And then these last 2 messages we sent eachother went like this...

I said: "yeah my brother is doing great! Him and his gf had a beautiful baby boy back in October last year
My parents arent together now, but are still friends, and I got married almost a year ago. I plan on going back to school next year etc...."

She replied by saying: "wow a lot of excitement. my siblings and I are still living up our youth... you know, no "serious" things yet like babies or marriage"

The sentence that rubbed me the wrong way was "My siblings and I are still living up our youth"....like, what the hell is that supposed to mean?!

I know she probably didn't mean it the way I took it, but I absolutely HATE it when people imply that just because someone is married when they are young doesn't mean they can't have fun just like single people! It's something that really really irritates me!!! My husband and I are still young and we have plenty of fun! We still go to the bar (usually just for everyones birthdays-just because its soo freakin expensive!), we still have parties, and our lives aren't super serious. We goof around and have sooo much fun together AND with friends.

I've heard comments from people (people I used to be friends with, strangers and people I know but wasn't really friends with) about how they could never imagine being married so young because they like to have fun. Or, well he or she is married so they probably dont want to come out tonight. Or, married people are boring.

That really pisses me off! That is so unfair and 100% not true! Im sorry, but my relationship status has nothing to do with my friendships and my level of fun. The only difference between us as a married young couple, and young single people is that we have someone other than ourselves to consider at the end of the day. If I decide to go to the bar for the night without hubby, he's fine with that as long as he knows when Im gonna be home. And the same with him. When he goes out without me he lets me know when he's gonna be home so I dont worry. That, and we aren't out hitting on other people lol... So that's what alot of single people do at the bar, but many people just go with their friends to have fun rather than trying to meet single people.

I duno... its just annoying to be stereotyped as old and boring just because I have someone who loves and respects me and visa versa.

lala, you vented your feelings about what singles feel about you.
Did this venting help?
Are you more comfortable about this issue?
If yes then we have an example of how venting helps.

I also find venting good for me. It is always better out than in! Pent up emotions can give you ulcers, and worse!

AF.

It helped to an extent. It got it off my chest at that moment. But the next time it happens, I will feel the same as I did. Perhaps it would help more if I told the people who have annoyed me with their comments on this topic. But I think I dont say anything to them specifically, because I have such strong feelings about it that I dont want to "blow up" at them. So I just keep it to myself I guess.

Venting does help yes - but is it better to vent alone, to a person who doesn't have to do with the issue, or to the person causing the issue?

But the final solution lies with telling the person responsible for the issue?