BellaOnline Forums Beauty and Self Self Development looking for self discovery books.. any advice also

hi i'm new here. i can see all the great advice going round so i thought i'd ask for some help.

here is the story:
when i left high school i was the person i always wanted to me, passionate, intune, opinionated and firm in who i was.

now its been 6 years and i feel like i'm locked in a cage... i dont know who i am anymore, i feel like an empty shell. I read a book a few years ago called "free to be me"...(wasnt a religious book it had to do with letting out the inner child... i cannot remember the authors but i know it was a couple who wrote it)... i miss my individuality... but these days all i do is stress about money and life and how to get where i want to be lifestyle wise and get out of this hole me and my partner are in....

that i have no inspiration, no life really... i loved painting and drawing, anything arty, was passionate about things and opinion, followed my beliefs and morals down to fighting for things i.e: animal rights etc... i feel numb mentally when my greatest hobby in younger years was having philisophical convos.... i use to find it soo peaceful to dablle in tarot cards, arts and crafts and gardening etc... now i feel like i simply dont have the energy or craving to do anything anymore...

i'v lost who i really am deep down and would love some book titles to get my on the right path...*please note i am not religious so we should probably steer away from god and other religious icons*.. i'm looking for something that opens your eyes to self discovery and inner self discovery.

any suggestions ...?... <img src="/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

Thank you Very much for your time...
Kel

Hi Kel,

I am so sorry that you are feeling lost. The important point I would like to make is this: you are still that same passionate person inside, but you have--important word here--TEMPORARILY lost what I call the Wow of Wonder.

Our culture tends to lump all those who have this feeling as "depressed" but that is really unfortunate because those who are lost are the ones who eventually find themselves. ;-)

One of the things you can do to open up your perspective is view this period as one of necessary awareness of the fact that you must be fully engaged in order to be fulfilled. It's not a symptom--it's a reason to celebrate! You've made it to first base in this game of life!

What's next? You must find your way to reconnect to yourself. You're still in there, Kel. You've just become distracted. Now that you see clearly that you're not in touch with your favorite part of yourself--your creativity--you can find your way there. That's second base.

Third base? Figuring out how to integrate your self-awareness in a way that allows you to find your place in the world.

Home: ahhh....you're safe. You're thriving. You're fulfilled. And life keeps handing you things, but you have the confidence, compassion and creativity to see your way through it.

I'm not really a baseball fan, but this seemed like a good way to explain it! ;-)

As for books? Don't rely on recommendations. Head to the self-help section and grab the one that jumps out at YOU. That's the best way to find the perfect book to help you right now. It will be exactly what you need.

Hope this helps. Don't despair. Start thinking about this period as the one that will really launch you. Be grateful for it. Once that happens, everything else will open up--I promise!

Warmly,
Maya

Hi and joyful soul finding,

I have to share a book I recently took out of the library that may be perfect for you (and others):

Self-Completion by Robert S. de Ropp

He mentions the trials and tribulations of getting off of the treadmill and into "the work" of mastering the self, how at least on the treadmill there are fantasies and buffers to keep one reasonably happy - and on the path of the work it is very difficult because you have to get over your own delusions and really strive to be better - and aware of your self all the time, no easy task!

Strangely, he talks about religions - but in a negative way, like saying how some ancient practices that the phophets left for us WERE really useful but dogmas and such have ruined them.

He also connects real factual science about the big bang, cell evolution, just about all physical known sciences into the path of self-mastery and I am finding it my favorite book so far!

I thoroughly like just about every Dr. Deepak Chopra book as well. I enjoy Indian / Hindu myths though, you might not. Wayne Dyer I like a lot too - for self-work.

As dr Ropp would probably say: beware of false teachers who want to make a lot of money and keep you ignorant. The best teacher will actually push you away and make you be your own teacher - in reality this is what is necessary.

Being "lost" or "frustrated" may be an excellent state to be in, like a clean slate to "learn fresh" hum?

Love and light being, Teo Do (Re, Mi, Fa...) <img src="/images/graemlins/tut.gif" alt="" />

Shakti Gawain's Living in the Light was very transformative for me-and my experience parallels yours very much. I lost myself in my early twenties (quite common I think when you leave school) and had to reclaim myself in my late twenties and early thirties. I also found a lot of wisdom in studying the chakra system and understanding the connection between personal power, creativity, self-expression, security, money issues, etc. I really like what Carolyn Myss has to say-her first book Anatomy of the Spirit really helped me integrate many things.

Hi Again Kel,

I just read a fantastic story in the Inspiration section
of this Forum and wanted to share it with you.

Here is The Link:

http://forums.bellaonline.com/showflat.p...ge=0#Post505145

To Magical Life!

Ayelet

Some of the books I've read over the past year, that have helped me, are:

"Journey to the Heart"
"The Language of Letting Go"
"Gratitude: Affirming the Good Things in Life"

The above three books are all written by Melody Beattie

"The Courage To Be Yourself" by Sue Patton Thoele

Hope this helps you. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Kel, I admire you so much for reaching out like you have here. That takes a tremendous amount of courage.

You haven't let us know your progress, so I hope you are doing well.

In the meantime, I'm creating a "Bookshelf" section in the Self Development area of this site and welcome recommendations from everyone to go along with the books I already plan to include.

My thoughts are with you in your journey.
Barbara

I read self help books for thirty years. Believe me, you feel good when you read the book, but after that it is all same. The best remedy in my opinion is to think about your life yourself. Don't worry about what you are missing. Let some time pass and things would be all right.

Hi Kel

I would like to acknowledge you for looking inside yourself for the answers, and not the outside.
Awareness is the first step! Well done <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
I have been through something similiar myself, I was lost, lonely, and very unsure of myself. I have done ALOT of personal work on myself and have come out on the otherside where there is chrystal clear blue skies.
I am just wondering what has happened to cause this shift in your perspective?
Im hearing that there are several things happening right now in your life, could I be right in saying that?

If you would like a free 15-Step ecourse for authentic self discovery (I designed this when I was learning to find my authentic self) I dont advertise it, but only give it to people in whom I believe would truly benefit from it. Its not one of those courses that are planted all over the internet, its a course thats also a collection of the steps that helped me discover myself. Let me know if you would like a copy, I also email them out to [color:"yellow"] [/color] clients in weekly slots so if you want to work through it in 15 weeks thats an option.

Your half way there!

Peace,
Sarah