How can they slam chairs into each other and so on?

Hey Orange!

As safe as those professionals are out there, not always is everything fake. Most of the time when a chair shot comes into play, the swinger acts like he is swinging with all his might. Sure! The impact makes a big bang, and I'm sure most of the time it does smart, but let's keep in mind after watching the Tough Enough series, that those athletes are trained individuals!! If it was all real, I don't think the wrestlers would last very long.

Thanks for your question and stopping in. Come back again!

Chele <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
wrestling@bellaonline.org

UUUUUGGGGGH! IT ISN'T FAKE, PEOPLE! Only the outcome is predetermined. No, you are not really trying to hurt anyone, it is just something that happens to a lesser degree then a real fight. Sheesh

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Chair shots are not fake. There is a way to tilt your head so the chair will hit the hardest part of your head. If you watch closely, you will see that the recipient will bow his head down just before the chair shot. Some (smart ones) will put their hand up and take the brunt of the chair with their hand. In the business, this is considered the coward's way out but I consider it saving brain cells.

While the person swinging the chair is not trying to do actual harm and is trying to make sure the thinnest part of the chair (seat) hits, contact is made and it hurts.

Some have gotten concussions from chair shots.

If anyone followed ECW at all, there is a monumental scene (which I actually have a video clip of) of what they call the chair shot from hell. Tommy Dreamer handcuffed Raven to the ropes or cage (forgot which) and gave him a screaming, blasting chair shot that could be heard for miles it seems. That chair was mangled and Raven's head busted open.(They recreated that scene in WCW with Kanyon doing the honors instead of Tommy but the ECW one was much more brutal.)

If someone says that's fake, I will be glad to get in the ring and swing the chair. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

The idea of the move is not to truly injure an opponent. But injuries happen every day. This is a dangerous business and every risk these guys take could result in a broken neck or worse. That is why it is so important to train. You need to know how to fall when you do a move and how to avoid injuries. There is no way that the moves these guys (and girls) do can NOT hurt. But the hope is that they can work well enough together to not be seriously injured. That isn't always the case as we see time and time again but that is the goal.

You can take a chair shot or any other shot on the flat part of the top of your head. A friend of mine and myself used to do it all of the time in the restaurant we worked in together. Steel chairs,cookie sheets,wet floor signs, whatever we could get our hands on.

He used to give me the Stunner and I always gave him a pile driver. Fun stuff.

I believe the ring steps are even made of aluminum now so they have a bit more give than the steel ones but getting hurt is very common in wrestling.

In fact when I went to wrestling school I had to sign a waiver saying that I could possibly be killed while performing some of the moves.

Plus when you watch a match on tv, look carefully and you will see the cameras switching angles to make a move look more devastating than it actually is.

It is definitely a dangerous business and I have the utmost respect for anyone who gets out there and do the things that they do. From the worst jobber to the biggest superstar.

THANK YOU! I would tell you all something, but I will invoke the time honored institution of kayfabe here and just let you wonder. It would rob a lot of the magic from what you see on tv. Let's just suffice it to say the wrestling moves, whether a chair shot or a suplex, do hurt, and I can not express enough the dangers of practicing ANY move without the proper training first. These professionals have been trained by some of the best, and in many cases have years and years of experience doing this, and they still get hurt. I myself DO NOT and WILL NOT do any wrestling move to anyone, even in front of a paying crowd, that I have not first learned and practiced many times during practice, and I am being trained by some of the best. PLEASE, AS THEY SAY, DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME! That goes double for you, Amadeus1220, you crazy sob.:D

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Well, some of us grew up before the "Don't try this at home" stuff. So my favourite move was the PileDriver too. Sorry!

Of course I only did it so I wouldn't hurt anyone and not someone who exceeded my own body weight.
I also used to answer the "Wrestlings Fake!" challenge by offering to put the Punk in a Boston Crab or Figure Four Leg Lock. (Umm, these were real, Sorry again).
I began to realize this was dangerous and stopped doing it. But it did stop the wrestlings fake questions.

Moves for the swimming pool or Bouncy Castle?
Razor's Edge, Power Slam (My fav), Power Bomb, Body Slam, Slam from shoulder carry, Samoan Drop, oh [censored]. Sorry Bad influence.

My nephews and Brother get clotheslines, Shoulder breakers, very slow power bombs (nephews are very little), The Elbow, Splash, Fire mans carry/air plane spin, etc. Dam, Sorry again.

Seriously, we've all done it. But Chris is right, we should leave it to the trained ones.

Tikus

PS. I've found a twisting arm bar VERY effective in real fights (not that I've been in many). Simple, effective, end of fight. You can stop them right then and there. Ooops, Sorry, I'm condoning it again aren't I.

Ok, I should say this then, "DO THESE MOVES AT YOUR OWN RISK". Then when you are either dead, or someone else is dead, please tell your family not to sue the wrestling industry, as it was your dumb arse that didn't listen.

Thanks for agreeing Tikus!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Wrestling hurts like hell, and I would never say its fake.

I still think I can inflict damage with a chair though, and am looking foward to giving one out one day. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Are you hoping to bust in on the VIC circuit.
Or do you just dream of Smacking a Chair upside someones head?

Ok, I'm staying clear of you and Chris. Ones a chair cracker and the other wants to clothesline me. Arrgghhh!!

Tikus

<img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I've just started training again... I'm working here as a valet and backstage interviewer (although I hope with a bit more intelligence than Maria/Kristal), but I figured it'd be good to know how to work so that if I ever get called upon, I'm not going to suck like those mentioned above.

but yes... in all honestly... just dreaming of smacking a chair across someone's head. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

First, Tikus, you asked for me to clothesline you, and I took you up on it. If you are too chicken, then I understand as I do throw a very impressive clothesline.

PrincessIce...Since I know chair shots hurt, you don't have to hit me with one, but I hear Mikieboy loves that kind of thing. So I nominate him. Good luck in your wrestling career, maybe we'll wrestle on the same card some day! If we do, stay away from me if you have a chair, we'll sit on the floor Pow Wow style instead!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Back when i was a kid i suplexed my brother once and knocked the lights off the ceiling. Had a hard time explaining that one to my mother! All the "don't try this at home" disclaimers just made us want to try it more. I do remember there being frequent tears though, so yes, it does hurt. All i can say is that im thankful we didnt grow up during the TLC era!

I had to train for six weeks to get the feel for what these people go through and they were the most painful six weeks of my life. Just running the ropes gave me welts and burns. I refused to take a piledriver though. Sorry, I am a writer, I need my arms to actually be able to work so I can type. Visions of a broken neck danced in my head.

Those chops are KILLER too. Wow. Especially on a person with a ... uh ... bulgy chest as opposed to a guy's muscular one.

My kids used to do wrestling moves on each other and I would scream at them all the time. Luckily, no one got hurt but they sure could have. I will never forget walking into their room and seeing one kid doing a tombstone piledriver on the other one. I thought my heart would stop.

Backyard wrestling is just.....not good. I know of a promotion near me that has no training and they throw each other around without a clue as to how to land or what to do. I am positive someone will be very seriously injured one day.

These days, they use light bulbs, chairs, they blade (Don't get me started on that!), and they definitely put themselves at risk for injury and infection.

But it's like talking to the wall so I stay away from it all and thank heaven that my sons stopped doing that stuff (But now my younger one is doing BMX bike tricks and coming home bloodied and ripped open. I thought we were past that with the first one. SIGH!).

Ouch great one you can't volunteer someone else!! It will always come round and getcha right back...

Oh, Mikeiboy, as far as coming around full circle, I do this every weekend, so it comes around to me once a week! BUT I also have TRAINED PROFESSIONALS doing it.I would never let anyone who never stepped into a ring do anything even how hokey and non dangerous to me. Ever.

Patty, about the refusal of the piledriver. Colonel and Buddy won't let us do them. They are way to dangerous, so that was a good call.

And as long as you have kids, whether it's wrestling moves or BMX, torn up kids comes with the territory!! My Girlies nine year old is heavily into bmx, and I feel for you!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Ugh. That one kid is gonna make me crazy. He is an accident waiting to happen. But I suppose it is better that he is outside ripping himself up than in the house staring at the XBox360 (which he does like to do).

My older kid is now the safe one. Who woulda thunk it? He was crazy when he was younger - wrestling, dirt bikes, anything that could result in a broken bone, he did. Yet never had a broken bone or a stitch yet. (TG)

Tell me about it. I don't have much "cushioning" so chops just go to the sternum and they hurt like hell. The upside is that it generally hurts the choppers hand.

And yes, the amount of backyarders here in Melbourne I get on MySpace is ridiculous. My best friend and I did a wrestling show for a talent quest at high school (we won) but we were on crash mats so I guess essentially we were safer than a ring... but that was totally without training and just copying what we'd seen on tv. We escaped without injury (and I even orchestrated a screw job ending with the "ref") but never again.

However, I've got a scar on my elbow from when Mr. Ice F-Ued me in a jumping castle at a friend's 21st in November, so nothing is safe. I did a flying head scissors on the same night and bit my tongue when I landed and it bled.

This is why I am training now. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Lol PrincessIce, I guess we could use you as a prime example of WHY you shouldn't do it.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Thats right! No nominating anyone else.
But since I did nominate myself, I'm game.
Actually I'm feling pretty safe over here. heh heh.

Patty, Boys will be Boys.
Bikes, Skateboards, Surfing, Fighting, Sport, Hell it's all part of growing up. Makes ya tougher. But, the Tombstone is a definate no no.

Just steer them away from Soccer. Sheila's Game!

Ah, see, I'm uncoordinated enough outside of doing any wrestling, I'd be no hope trying any kind of wrestling move at all. Some people just think they're bulletproof.

Oh well, I hope everyone who is training here stays healthy and successful!

And Tikus, do we Aussies have to explain what a sheila is?!

I thought Tikus meant Sheilas game was some lady named Sheilas game. I don't speak fluent Aussie, though I would love to learn. What is it? lol

And Tikus. I nominate who I see fit, junior! I thought we was a tag team? Don't tell me we are already seeding a face turn for you!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

As long as you don't start thinking Steve Irwin is a true reflection of Australian speaking...I WILL hunt you down!!

A sheila is a woman, basically. And I agree, soccer is a sheila's game. After all, David Beckham plays it. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Steve Irwin isn't a good depiction of a true Aussie? Who would have thunk it? lol. Next thing you will tell me is that you don't say "mate" every other word, and at the end of every spoken sentence? LOL. Hunt away Cat, I ain't hard to find, just remember to hang a left at Albuquerque! In truth, I always had a wanting to go to Australia, I have heard nothing but good things. I hope to see it some day.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Steve Irwin is a wrestling legend, by crikey! Anyone who can wrestle and pin a croc deserves a shot in the WWE IMHO!

Steve Irwin is just stupid and the law of averages says he is going to get his one day from an angry croc or a quicker snake. Or maybe Gator Steve Keirn will get him lol with that nasty, stinky claw he has hanging around his neck. lol.

As far as Backyard wrestling goes, those people just have something wrong with them. They video tape the matches and send them off to wrestling organizations in hopes they will be impressed. They aren't.

There is one on Cable Access here on Fri nights at 11pm called KAOS. Don't recall what it means as far as I am concerned it means Kids Are Omnipotently Stupid (Sorry couldnt think of a better word for "O") but you get my drift. Now they even have a Backyard wrestling video game as well. I guess, whatever sells.

And yes I have little ones too who I like to perform wrestling moves on so maybe its not kids who are the stupid ones. lol.

Remember when Irwin brought his toddler into a croc cage, or whatever they are called? He is stupid. I KNOW the average Aussie is smarter then that.

As far as backyard Wrestling goes, there is a reason it's called garbage.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

I remember the toddler/croc controversy. Some say the baby was in no danger, others think he is crazy.

I used to have a little crush on him then I thought he was looney tunes.

I have tons of Aussie friends and not one has the same dialect as the other. They all have different words for things and phrases for stuff. I love it.

I have Irish and Scottish friends too and enjoy their accents and their slang.

I, of course, have no accent. Just like Eastern Standard Time is the only time there is <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Patty, I have been on the west coast for about five years. Everyone here sounds normal to me, but at least once a week someone ALWAYS says "Are you from Minnasota?" I used to go into a long schpliel about no, I am from Michigan, and that they sound normal, I thought I did too, but now it happens so often I just quietly say "Close enough".

I bet, living in "New Yawk" you sound kinda, well, New Yawkish. Have you spent time in Brooklyn (Or however the heck you spell it? I can put a little red hook in your voice when I imagine you speaking, lol!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

The closest any animal has gotten to ripping one of Steve Irwin's limbs off, that I have seen, was...believe it or not...a koala. <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> It went charging at his leg, growling all the way, but sadly got pulled away at the last minute. If he had bitten him, it could have been one of the greatest moments in the history of television. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


Anyhoo, has anyone here seen CZW? I was just wondering what that was like - the whole 'hardcore' rep kind of puts me off, as most 'hardcore' matches tend to be, well, stupid.

There ain't no way some cuddly Koala would rip anything off. They are so cute and cuddly!

CZW? What the heck is that? More Aussie-ese? I am learning!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

And they have claws that are very sharp, and they get grouchy frequently! Or maybe koalas just don't like me?!!

CZW is, I think it stands for Combat Zone Wrestling? Not Australian, sorry!

I have never seen an angry koala, they are too busy munching eucalyptus thingies and hugging trees. How can a tree hugger be anything but gentle?

CZW. Oh. I thought you Aussies were trying to slip something by me. You got to watch them Aussies you know!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Fair Dinkum! You make one little comment about Bruces and Sheila's and everyone goes off on a wild tangent.

Koala's are nasty little buggers. I say Kill 'em all!!!







Nah, not really. Actually, due to their Eucalyptus only leaf tip eating habbits, they spend almost their whole life completely stoned outta their little furry heads. Being so smashed they display that cute sleepy look.
But, ever tried to take a bottle off a Wineo? No, nor have I. But I bet it would get pretty nasty. Same goes with Koalas. Take them away from there source and they get pretty cranky. They will bite and have very sharp little claws.

Steve Irwin is a complete wacko. I think he's been eating Eucky leaf tips too. lol.
Actually, I have a mate who looks and talks exactly like Steve. Hmm, no more like Steve on speed. Yes, that bad!
Still he did introduce me to my wife, so I can't completely write him off. Plus its an endless source for stories.

Just for the record. Croc's pretty much only eat Yanky tourists. Sharks eat freakin' anyone. Makes surfing fun. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

TGO, of course we're a Tag Team cobber.
Just hold back on the clothesline, or feel the wrath of my dreaded "Koala Claw!!" Scarey huh?

No face turn here. In the words of the great Jesse Ventura, "I just call it like it is Mcmahon".

Anyway, you're all crazy. You crack me up reading this. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Cat, loved the Beckham comment. ha ha

Tikus

Tik,

Koala Claw? KOALA CLAW??? OMG! SHADES OF THE KRUSHER!.

Let me guess, Koala Claw is a claw to your...errrr, I think I get the picture. Oh well, I'll just have to put you in my dreaded "Over the Lips and through the gums with a Kung Fu Death Grip" move.

As far as Steve Irwin goes...Why do all Aussies HATE the guy? Everyone knows Irwin isn't a good representation of a true Aussie, But Harrison Ford is! (Kinda Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doomish!)

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Oh, and more about Koalas. Next thing you are going to tell me is that them cute, cuddly kangeroos are dangerous too! Koalas and "Roos, menaces to the Outback.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Actually, you ever heard of the boxing kangaroo? They can kill you, you know. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

And if I told you Steve Irwin was a wanker, what would that mean to you?

So, this thread was about stuff, right?

<img src="/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

Sorry Great One,

Have to disagree with you. Eastern Standard Time does rock and you should know that since you are from Michigan. Thats where I am now. I am originally from New York and when I came here people told me I had an accent and thats strange because I am not from the city. I was upstate by the Albany.

Heard a great joke the other day. Why is California like a bowl of Granola? Its full of fruits and nuts. ha ha ha ha ha ha I crack me up.

You Aussies need to not watch out for the Koalas as much as you do the dingos.

Remember the East Coast is the Best coast!

Most people in Australia think I have a slight accent... some weird Canadian/Danish hybrid.... although our last 3 generations have all been born here and I've only been overseas twice (and to neither of those countries) so I don't know how I developed it.
We have Danish heritage going back about 4 generations, and the Canadian thing... too much TV and maybe US + Aussie = Canadian?
I only use mate at the end of sentences if I'm being stupid and putting on the thick Aussie accent. I very rarely use Aussie-isms but I know what they are.

First of all...

Cat, I never heard of a boxing kangaroo. I have heard they can be "tempermental", but I still don't believe it. I'll make a deal with you, I will get in a cage with a boxing kangaroo for five minutes if you will get in a cage with an American Mountain Lion for two. Oh, I know what Americans mean by wanker, but I don't want to be kicked out of the Forum, so use your imagination. It's below the belly button, above the knees.

Amadeus, I LOVE MICHIGAN, no matter how far away I go or how long I stay away or whatever state me mug is posted on a driver license, Michigan will always be my home. Well, during three of the four seasons anyway, in the winter you can have it. As far as the time zone controversey (spell?) WHATEVER THE TIME ZONE THE GREAT ONE IS IN, IS THE TIME ZONE TO BE IN/WORK OFF OF. One more crack like that and you will be kicked out of the Alcolytes. BTW, Mount Pleasant, isn't it? WHY? lol....

Princess, You know, I kind of agree with you, I think the medium that is television does shape the worlds lexicon (spell?). The more citizens of the world that watch television I think we might some day, perhaps over a great deal of time, but someday all speak in a universal twang. Maybe a Brooklyn-ese/Aussie-ese/Mount Pleasant-ese kind of messed up accent. And we will all use universal slang too. Since I am too good looking to die, I am going to live forever and see it for myself. Can't wait, then I won't have to ask what a sheila is and whatnot.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

"A Dingo stole my Baby!!"

Koala's are really only deadly if they hit you from falling out of a tree. Which reminds me

3 Koalas were living in a tree, one falls to the ground, Why?
He was dead
The second Koala also falls to the ground
Why?
He was stoned on Eucky leaves
The last Koala also falls
Why?
Peer Preasure. Yuck Yuck Yuck.

Steve Irwin is indeed a Wanker!
But not as big a Wanker as Vinnie Mac. Vinnie Mac nears the top of my Biggest Wanker list which is currently topped by Eddie Maquire. Giant Wanker!

Miss Princessice, I think it is just hard for Europeans to loose their accent, even after a few generations.
But not as hard as it is for Suth Ufreekuns and Nu Zilundez (Choice Bro).

Actually Princess, I'll bet if you went to any other english speaking world, they'd think you Do have an Aussie accent.

Yup, thats it for this 'wrestling comment'

Tik

I was just talking with the girly on the phone when I was here writing, and I just talked in what I considered an Aussie accent. She said if I tried that again she would kick my arse. And not to offend any Aussies with me messed up version.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Yeah. That's totally right, everyone else in the world could pick my Aussie accent easily... although in New Zealand both me and my fiance got mistaken for US/Canadians... I think that was more just because we stood out in NZ, not because of our accents.

As for generations losting their accent, both of my parents have very "Aussie" accents as does all my relatives so maybe it just all passed on to me.

This has nothing to do with the topic anymore!

It kind of does. The topic is "How fake is it?" We just switched from wrestling to accents. lol

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

For some reason reading this reminded me of the simpsons episode where they all visit australia. Bart takes over a frog which breeds and devastates the australian crops. The simpsons escape on a helicopter, but the camera zooms out and you see a psycho koala hanging on to the outside!!

Oh, gosh. Them poor koalas still getting bashed. Poor fuzzy wuzzy little guys. You people are MEAN!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Wow, I leave for a day and the thread turns to Koalas, boxing kangaroos (TGO, how could you NOT have heard of them?), and slang terms.

Hmmm...

Well carry on. I see no reason to stop your fun.

I am just glad you all realize that EST is the only time.

You may proceed.

Oh, Patty. Oh, dang. Going head to head against TGO and the time zone thing. So be it. Just realize, Patty, that you can't be right all the time. lol

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Hey, talking about Bart Simpson and Frogs.....

Did you know that The Cane Toad is the only animal in Australia you can actually be cruel too and practically get applauded for it? (Don't know of any other animals where this is the case anyway). Hit 'em four six with a Golf club or cricket bat, chuck 'em on the Barby, Run 'em over or squash 'em with your shoe. All legal and accepted.

Actually, we never got those big ugly things in the West. So all you in the East can keep them.

Tik

Yeah, I know, yucky story.
Hey, no one took my Eddie Maguire bait? You mean all you Vic's agree with me?

Who in the bloody heck is Eddie Maguire? And I hate frogs!

AND I surpassed Patty in total posts, YAY!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Well, I'm from Sydney - we all hate Eddie!

The only way you can get people to humanely kill cane toads now is by giving them a free beer in exchange for a frozen toad (true, in the NT anyway)! So Australian. SQUASH EM!

I think I am missing something here, anyone care to ad me to the loop?

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Sure what's your Address? I'll get Cat to send you a couple million of the Ugly little Buggers. Toads that is, not Maguires. We ain't that cruel

No animal should be hurt <img src="/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

Now I want to start a fund for poor little Cane Toads.

And as far as post posts, it's quality not quantity, my friend.

Plus, I have a zillion boards plus myspace and epinions boards and 500 other places I am in demand. Ahhh...it's a tough job but someone has to be the queen of the net.

Ohhh CC Deville on TV. Gotta see then write a column.

Lockdown was tonight and Christy Hemme debuted among other things. I really like her and am so happy for her! (I like CC better though so I will write the column after he is off TV.)

Patty, you saying my dialogue isn't witty and hard hitting? I beg to differ, sister!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

When the oft subject of wrestling and realism comes up I am reminded of Bret's quote from wrestling with shadows (paraphrased)

Why is it that an actor can make you believe they are the character and its great acting. A couple of wrestlers look all for the world like they are killing each other and its "Fake"

Steve Irwin is great!

Loved it when Bret said that. It is true too.

People expect so much from these guys. I think they give us so much and risk their lives and bodies for us. It is sad when I see people dissing wrestlers and calling wrestling FAKE.

Predetermined. Yes.

Entertainment. Yes.

Fake? No. Ask any of them who broke their necks, are paralyzed, or have many injuries that will haunt them for life. The pain isn't fake and the passion isn't fake.

I think anyone who wrestles for a living, that is, wrestling is there full time job, so they wrestle, umm, full time, deserve a medal. I ache after I get done raking the yard because I used muscles long gone dorment!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

I truly love having to explain to people that the blood is real...

and that the fire that Mick Foley and Edge went through at Wrestlemania was actually fire, as opposed to, I don't know, fake fire?!!

<img src="/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

LOL Cat, everyone knows Mick employes the fake fire,chairs and who knows what else.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Cane toads, koalas, steve Irwin. All to be afraid of yes but remember...it was a Dingo that ate your baby.

That Simpson episode when they went to Australia was all time favorite episode.

On a personal note...TGO, Patty really sent you reeling to the ropes with that quantity-quality thing lol. Sure hope you can recover from that devastating blow.

Oh yeah, did we ever find out what an Eddie Maguire is?

EDIT: This is about Mick Foley. I should quote from now on.

Yeah and a fake missing earlobe. Ha. I have the ONLY photo ever taken of that incident. My publisher was there when it happened and took graphic photos (Mick asked him to!). He did give one to Foley who I think published it on a book but I have the original slides and they are sick. He only had a hole and no ear! They sewed some on but eww.

They nearly threw the ear out. This was in Germany and no one knew what was going on but he did end up with a piece sewn back on.

That was all fake too. *sigh*

Amadeus,

Yeah, Patty got me a good one when I wasn't lookin'. But you know what they say, shame me once, shame on you, shame me twice...and no, not boo hoo hoo.

Luckily for me I have no pride, because if I did I would have to stick my head in a hole like an ostrich!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Oh, Eddie McGuire is a wanker.

The president of one of the most famous (and hated) fottball clubs in Australia, was the host of The Footy Show and Who Want's To be a millionaire as well as a football commentator, now the boss of one of the television networks. Was Melbourne's problem, but the idiot has moved up to sydney now, he's called eddie everywhere cos you just can't get away from him.

After a nuclear holocaust, only the cockroaches, and Eddie McGuire, will still be alive.

There's my rant for the day, thank you! *bows, jumps off soapbox*

Umm, I don't know what a wanker is, especially an Australian one. And by "football" I take it you mean soccer?

I always thought soccer was cool, and if I wasn't so darn clumsy I would have given it a whirl back in the day, but soccer isn't too popular here, so I'd have had to join a league. I hate leagues...lol.

So, what's a wanker?

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

TGO, and anyone else who wants to know.
Get an illustrated dictionary. Make sure it�s a fairly recent edition. Look up the word "Wanker". Right next to the work Wanker is a picture of Eddy McGuire.
Does that help everyone?

My condolences to you Cat and all Sydneysiders. What a bummer. How will he live without Collingwood?

Oh, and I thought Cat and I (or was that princessIce) cleared up the Soccer issue. Soccer is for Woosses and Sheila's. Footy, is like umm, Carnage. Boy do I miss it.
No REAL Aussie goes near soccer; even Wankers like Eddie leave it alone.

And yes. Wrestling is Fake. We are all just wasting our time at this forum. Sorry Patty, but you've wasted your life in this profession. (Yes, that is sarcasm).

Not many things rile me up more than some tosser telling me wrestling�s fake whilst I'm watching it. And then they don't leave!!!

My old man is a Boxing Fan. Hey, I like it too. But every now and then he loves a stir. He�ll watch it (wrestling) for a while and then for some reason he makes the "This is Fake" type comment. I finally found the ultimate counter.
Anyone seen the Mohamed Ali Vs Sonny Listen fight (NoII).
The one minute 10 sec fight. Well, it must've been one hell of a punch because the wind from the glove that missed Sonny by a freakin mile knocked him down for the 10. Now that�s fake, and man do I love to let Dad know about it. Hey, paybacks a you know what.

Tikus

Oh, The Great One is in great need of an Aussie education!!

OK...

a) Football in Australia can be either rugby league, rugby union or AFL (Australian Rules). McGuire is an AFL fiend.

b) Soccer is soccer, and that was me, Tikus!

c) a wanker is a man who...I thought you knew this already? Can I tell you to look it up online? I'm sure you'll find it somewhere!!! A jerk = a wanker, kinda. Just, it's more ...yeah, look it up.

<img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Anyhoo, my father took it upon himself to tell me that being suplexed around the ring wouldn't hurt at all, because the 'floor' is canvas, "it's not like it's concrete or anything".

How does someome not know what a wanker is?

Then again tons of my friends are Aussies and Brits so I am multi slanglingual <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Being multislanglingual is one of the greatest gifts a person can have, Patty! Although, I had a bunch of American friends who came down here for my course at uni, and by the end of it they knew so much Australian slang their friends back home probably hate me!

None of them could pronounce wanker properly though. It just never sounded right!!! I guess as long as you spell it properly and say 'arse' instead of '[censored]', it's all good, I guess!

The Aussies will take over the world one day. It might have to be the Australian cockroaches and Eddie McGuire, but it shall be done.

Football in Melbourne means only one thing, AFL.

All other forms are hereby denounced <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

You get dirided in this coutry if you call football anything other than the game you play with just your feet :-)

Dude, your a Pom! So for you, all Europeans and Asians we will make an exception regarding what is Football in your own country.

Just make sure you call it soccer in Australia. lol.

For me. Footy is AFL. I also like Rugby League and don't really like, but can watch Union.

Hey, we all like wrestling anyway

Tikus

I hope "Pommy" is not gonna upset you. "Aussie" is fine for us Australians. (Just checking)

Ok, I got the "picture" of what a wanker is, and I thought that's what it was. But the word was being bandied around this post in several different contexts that I thought maybe Aussies applied a different meaning to it. Next time refer to it as spanking the monkey, that will clear up all confusion.

Rugby? Ouch, I never saw a whole game, but anyone who plays rugby has my respect, that is some brutal stuff.

As far as wrestling being fake. That just shows how little some idiot thinks he knows. Is the outcome predetermined? Sure, so is the movie someone may be watching. But the stunts, and the brave stunt "PERSONS" who make the movie exciting are real, and real dangerous.

I wrestle in a very old ring. If Patty knows anything about the old rings they had in the Pacific Northwest Territory, that's what I wrestle in. So it doesn't have much give. And I am sure everyone has heard of the old WWE rings, they were like concrete, or so I hear, because the network executives said a bouncing ring wasn't very camera friendly.

Anyway, I love it when someone who has never ever stepped into a ring and took a bump or got punched or anything pass judgement on something they have no experience in. It used to make me mad, but now I just feel sorry that they seem to have it all figured out, and go around sounding stupid to the people who actually know.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

TGO, you can call someone a wanker (even your mates, sometimes they are being wankers), but it doesn't neccesarily mean they're literally "spanking the monkey".

Although in Eddie's case?

LOL, ok then, I have not a clue what an Aussie wanker is. In America if I called someone a wanker, that means he is participating in the time honored tradition of..well, you know.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Wanker also means you're being pretentious - but that's kinda boring. And if you're pretentious, chances are you do partake in the activity of wanking more than most...

Eddie McGuire would, I guess, be a perfect example!!

I guess Eddie McGuire would be a prime example..if I knew who he was!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

it's like calling someone a "part of the male anatomy"head... it doesn't mean that they literally have a uh.... you know what... for a head.

Ummm, ok. How did this thread degenerate down to Eddie McGuire? lol. He probably hasn't been written about so extensivley ever!

Thanks for the "heads up" Ice!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Oh yes he has.

Just not so complimentary <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I think you guys are being entirely too hard on the poor guy.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Oh, TELL me you didn't just say that?!!

You either love him or hate him. And that tends to coincide with whether or not you follow his football team. Not a great proportion of Aussies do.

It's an Australian thing, you gotta be here to understand!!

Damn, TGO is a gecko already? I'm sick of being an amoeba, I mean, it's an amoeba for god's sake!!

It's all about quality not quantity.

I really do have to see if I can change these titles though. Yeck.

TGO, I'm your Tag partner man! Do you think I would lie to you about someone being the Ultimate wanker?

I don't think so.

Hey, Tikus made the Jellyfish grade. Hmm, nah, hard to get excited about being a Jellyfish

Tikus

If only for the simple reason that, logically, a shark should be greater than a gecko!

Yeah what is this hierarchy based on? I would much rather be a shark than a gecko. Maybe it is the slow ascent to human?

I have no idea. But I doubt I will be able to change it since post counts are calculated on how many posts you made on any forum not just one so we all will have to swim along, I suppose. <img src="/images/graemlins/fish.gif" alt="" />

I didn't know geckos swam in oceans. It makes sense if you think about it. An amoeba, small cell like creature, jellyfish, water based animal, shark, the king of the ocean. Now geckos is the low on the totem poles for land based animals. See? it all follows logical progression!

Quality over quantity? I have it covered on both scopes people! I offer quality posts in quantity!

And Tikus, you are right, lol. You wouldn't mislead me. DEATH TO EDDIE MACGUIRE! And I don't even know who the guy is!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

How did I forget to come back and read this thread? <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

LOL Great One, did I say logic? Logic schmogic!

But see, that's one path of logic you could follow. The other, I just figure if it can eat you whole, it should be higher than you!

Yes, Cat. But you don't see too many sharks walking around on dry land searching for geckos now do you, Hmmm? lol I could hang out in a tree hanging over a deep pool of ocean water and, as a gecko, make faces, laugh, point and over all mock the heck out of you. You being the shark, well, ain't nothing you could do about it unless I fell in the water!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

I do like the titles set on The Fringe. They are made for wrestling fans. Jobbers, Midcarders, Main Eventers ect..

Se7en

Technically, you couldn't point, not having any fingers. Maybe shake a leg at me or something.

And yes, you win. For now! <img src="/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

Cat, ever see the Gecko from the Geico commercials? He points. Oh, and I ALWAYS win. It's what I do.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Um, Australian? No idea what Geico is! Maybe you have super evolved American geckos...although ours can throw mud at people (Bridgestone commercials? Eh, some tyre ads, I dunno)...

And...I haven't seen ya beat Patty yet, hmmm?

Oh, Cat. I forgot you was from Australia, therefor don't know about the Geico Gecko. As far as me always winning, as it pertains to Patty, I ALWAYS win because I only battle when I know I will win. Therefore, Patty and TGO are not going to meet on the field of battle because then my sparkling record might get a little tarnished. TGO isn't stupid!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Oh no TGO there's no MIGHT about it I'm sure Patty would "Lay the Smack Down on your candy [censored]!" I mean "Can you smelllllll what our Patty is cookin"

<img src="/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

LOL Mickieboy. I like Patty alot, I would'nt want her totally thrashing me on her consiounce (yeah, I know I butchered that one) and making her feel bad. BUT IF I DID... I guess I would win, in a way, after all. Even when I lose I win. It's a curse. It's hard being me everyday, I spend a lot of time wanting to kick my own arse!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Heh.

See, Mickieboy, I didn't even illicit a true response from Patty. So her thrashing me would weigh too heavy on her consience. So, I guess I'll have to say I would win, by proxy.

Remember I love ya Patty, don't hurt me.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

lol, ah but it got a response. Maybe Patty couldn't write for laughing at the thought of doing a 5 star frog splash on you from the top turnbuckle. <img src="/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/images/graemlins/devil.gif" alt="" />

TGO, Tag out partner!! Tag Out!!!

Tik'

Oh no you don't drags TGO back to Patty's corner...

Looks like I got me a bodyguard/tag team partner. Mikeyboy will hot tag me at the precise time and let me finish you off with a smooth and simple over the knee backbreaker that will have you tapping and squealing and calling me "Queen of all wrestling". <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I have no doubt in my mind about you being the "Queen of all wrestling." I remember the night you smacked Konan down in front of Kidman and Rey. He went off whining like a little child who was caught in a lie.

Mikie, you'll have an easy match with her as your tag partner.

Se7en

DOH! You really have a good memory. I hope he doesn't. Heheh. <img src="/images/graemlins/angel.gif" alt="" />

Tik,

TGO and Tik vs Patty and Mickieboy. Special guest referee Se7en. Hmmm. I don't know if I have enough schooling to be in the Bella main event. Oh, what the hell, you are on! Tik, you start out and watch for Patty's crooked underhanded tactics. She likes to jab you in the eye with a pencil, like Ed Farhat used to. And Mickeyboy, you'll tap to my new and improved "Koala Klaw of Death!"

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

No way TGO, try that and I'll grab the ropes man. Oh and Patty and I do not cheat, although we both went to the Ric Flair school of Low blows and we both love Eddie so well wait maybe we will LIE, CHEAT and STEAL our way to victory..
<img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Then we will just have to cheat!
TGO, have any problem with the below motto?
"Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat".

Anyone remember who said that? Clue, mid/late 80's commentator.

<img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Tikus

Who is Jesse Ventura? I hear Jeopardy music.

Now how am I going to ref a match with all heels? I guess if Mikie and Patty did learn from Flair's and Guerrero's School of Wrestling, They'll pass as 'tweeners but still, I think I have my work cut out for me.

Se7en

No, Tik, no problem with that at all. And it's only cheating if you get caught.

Heels vs heels. Has it's potential problems. But, in today's world there are no true heels nor true faces, but shades of gray. But, since both teams will be employing cheating tacticts, why not make this the Eddie Guerrero "Lie, Cheat and Steal" Memorial match? May the better team, or students of Eddies hallmarks cheat their way to victory!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Oh yes lets, cracks a chair on the ring, throws it to TGO and watches Patty fall to the floor.. Then shouts to 7 "Hey ref he hit Patty with a chair"

Mikieboy,

Ummm, I was planning on smacking you with the chair. Even TGO isn't stupid enough to take on Patty directly. I was leaving the wrestling of her up to Tikuls.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

TGO,

Ah then you must have missed Eddies lesson number 324, was a good lesson.

Mike <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

All of Eddie's lessons were good. I don't, however, plan to frog splash anyone. I would rather use the knucks I keep in my bra.

Can y'all make it a no-DQ, no holds barred match? That's heaps more fun for us in the audience. Chairs and brass knucks, that's the best you've got? C'mon!!!

Well, Cat, you just been nominated, and I accepted on your behalf, to be the Ring Valet for me and Tikus. What you bringing to the ring to help us out? lol

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Oh, I think I could handle that. Can I bring a trolley full of stuff...? Stop signs, kendo sticks, the whole lot, baking trays, garbage bins...ooh, I have plans... *evil cackle*

oh, and a boxing kangaroo. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

If you can lug it, you can bring it. I will be too busy hauling my pompous, over the top obnoxious self to the ring.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Ohhh no Dq is it? Cool.

I've got a Classie Freddy Blassie bite for Patty's pencil hand.
And a blatant Roddy Piper poke in the eye for the ref (sorry seven).
TGO!! I said Nipple Gripple with that "Koala Klaw" on Mickieboy, not Cripple Gripple (that looks a little low for me). Ahh well, he ain't strutting now. heh heh.
Hey Cat! How's that boxing Kanga coming along? Is it house trained?

Tikus

Umm...house-trained yes, ring-trained no <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

No DQ, cool bring it on "Bang bang!"

Ok, it's all set. Patty is gonna bust out her backyard ring. To get to her house, go to the corner, turn left and remember to turn right at Albuquerque.

Tikuls, nipple gripple it is (on Mickieboy, Patty's are off limits, for obvious reasons!). The cripple gripple is used only on specail occasions.

Oh, and Tikuls, how tall are you? From the pic it looks like you have some decent height to you.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

6ft2" or 185cm.
Actually, to compare against wrestlers I've been next to.
Taller than; Tatanka, Beefcake, Hawk.
About the same; Barbarian.
Shorter than; Jake Roberts.

Side note. If you never saw Hawk for real, you would be surprised at how Thick he was, as in Chest to Back. The guy certainly spent some time in the Gym.

About Patty in the ring, what actually is the etiquette here?

Tikus

Yeah your not to hit Patty she's a LADY..

TGO the nipple gripple? Oh you kinky devil you...

Well I guess it's time to use the Super wedgie...

I will take hits. No nipple ANYTHINGS though, tyvm. I, however, am allowed to low blow, pull hair, rake eyes, and use distraction in my favor. I am after all, a GIRL. <img src="/images/graemlins/queen.gif" alt="" />

I think the etiquette is that, as the only other girl involved, I deal with Patty, no? <img src="/images/graemlins/devil.gif" alt="" />

And I agree, leave the nipples alone.

Tikuls,

About Hawk from LOD, there is a dvd out there entitled "Road Warriors, the life amd death of the most powerful team in wrestling history". It was put out by WWE, and I HIGHLY recommend it. In it they tell the story from before wrestling, the Road Warriors in the beginning, to now with Animal still wrestling. A big part of the DVD centers around their physical appearance, and how they got there! It is a great piece, and I would recommend it to anyone.

As far as how I choose to wrestle Patty. I reserve the right to use the Koala claw, in all it's nipple gripple beauty on anyone! I just CHOOSE not to execute it on her. That and I don't want her husband to kick my behind for real. LOL. So, I'll just introduce her to my good friend Ms Schott. You may have heard of her? First name of Cheyr?

The match is to be held really soon. As soon as Patty finishes promoting it, and drags her back yard ring out of the garage. Se7en as Guest Referee, and Cat is our (Tikus and TGO) Valet. Can't wait, should be fun.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Wow TGO and Tik must be afriad of you Patty they were serious about needing a valet to help them win...

<img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Any Girl who goes by the name "Cat" is welcome in my corner. Plus she's an aussie so I think we've got some good chemistry with this team. Besides, we do need a balancer for Patty's womanly ways. And that leaves Tikus and one fired up TGO to concentrate on the remaining opponant.
Thats bad news for you Mickieboy!

Tikus

How? I'm Scottish, think Rowdy Roddy Piper on his best day.... <img src="/images/graemlins/devil.gif" alt="" />

Skirling bagpipes and tartan kilt a swinging, TGO will be running for the hills... <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

While it may be true Sean Connery scares the bejesus out of me when he comes out in a kilt, I think I can hold it together for one match. So, Mikieboy, wear the kilt with pride!

I ain't afraid of Patty. That's my story and I am sticking to it.

Warming up me three koala klaw fingers, and sitting on the steel, non gimmicked chair I'll be bringing with me...

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Just no stinkfaces, Mikie, we don't need an answer to the question "What do Scotsmen wear under their kilts?". Please?!!

Mikie MUST wear a kilt. It will inspire me. (Although I agree with the no stinkface rule!)

I am sorry to burst your bubbles guys, but Cat has been in secret negotiations with me (so secret she didn't even know it) to be in my corner because, as you know, women always stick together. Even when they are "cat" fighting.

I think having Cat in my corner should be legal since I consider her a weapon. Sharpen the claws and get ready to do some good old fashioned scratching, Cat.

Naturally there is a chance she will turn on me but I am willing to chance it. Mikie will watch my back and 7, as usual, will be the fair and very down the center ref that he has been in the past.

And I won't make him wear a thong this time.;)

Yep, right down the middle and we will leave our little wrestling matches wearing thongs out of this. Come to think of it, I believe you cheated in that match too?

Se7en

Wow, they are secret negotiations!! Don't worry fellas, I only turn on people if they treat me badly (promise <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> ), so TGO and Tikus - RESPECT! Especially you, Tik, treat your fellow Aussies well, and they'll attack someone for you. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

hmmm swerve in the making?

Se7en

Go ahead Patty, negotiate with Cat. You can't cash the check Tikuls is writing to keep her honest.

One thing is bothering me more then it should. If Se7en comes to the ring in a thong, I am definitley gonna puke all over the place. And Mikieboy, if you even think of using a Kiltified stinkface, I'll be forced to tell Mr Connery. I think he'll kick your butt for cheapaning the power of the Kilt.

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Oh now see you've gone and put idea's in my head... I had not even thought about the STINKFACE!! until YOU mentioned it.. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

THANKS WHOEVER BROUGHT UP THE STINKFACE THING. IF I GET NAILED BY IT NOW I WILL BE...WELL, STINKFACED TO ALL BEGONE HELL!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Sorry TGO, I think that was me!!

And did I hear someone say something about a check for me? Woohoo! <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Yep, Tikuls was opening up the ol' checkbook for you. Hope you like to spend Mexican Pesos!

~Chris <img src="/images/graemlins/king.gif" alt="" />

Can I pay in Rph? How does a cool 10 000 sound?

Cat, you've got true blue aussie digga grit running through your veins. I know TGO and I are safe.

Soooo, we're fighting Patty, and some dude who wants to wear a skirt. I don't know about fighting two sheilas. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Oh Tik you've crossed the line, calling a Kilt a skirt. <img src="/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

But you're fine with him calling you a sheila?

You Scots are crazy! <img src="/images/graemlins/easter.gif" alt="" />

Being called a Sheila why would that bother me I personally have been called worse but to have a dig at someones heritage is a definite low blow... <img src="/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

Mind Games my friend. Mind Games.

You aint taking on some chicken little team here.
If you were really jacked about the heritage dig, you'd be smacking me upside my head with a coconut Roddy Piper style. (Quite appropriate too, since your Scotish and I live in Bali).
But no.....you whine. Oh, this match gonna be fun!!!!
TGO, Cat. It is on.

Tikus

In the event of mind games backfiring, I reckon I should be nowhere near Mikie. He sounds cranky. And you know what happens when he's cranky?

Stinkfaces.

I'll be hiding under the ring somewhere. Or behind Se7en.

Besides, kilts rule. Just ask Roddy Piper.

Hmmm, good point. Umm, Mikie, The Great One made me say it.
(points and snickers).

Hey, the skirt comment was a deliberate low blow. I did say I was gonna cheat. lol

Tikus

The Great One will not be able to participate so we need a subsitute. Any takers?

And, Mikie, I do hope you aren't angry. I am sure no one meant any true insult to the wondeful Scottish heritage. And I mean that, not joking. (Yes, I have a think for kilts but I have two very close friends and also Mikie who is also a friend who are from Scotland).

Behind me can't be safe. In a group like this, you just know the ref is going to go down. I see missed clotheslines and me catching a bad dive already.

As soon as we find a new member for Team..... What's the team names? We'll start the match in a new thread.

7

Okay Patty doesn't want me to get upset so I'll put away the "Braveheart" blue face paint and hang the freshly sharpened Claymore back on it's mounts.. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Did you take TGO out backstage Patty? Good work if you did see we Lie, we cheat, we steal.. <img src="/images/graemlins/angel.gif" alt="" />

Something like that. I fight dirty, ya see.

So we need a stand in who is willing to fight hard and go down even harder (Oh stop thinking what I am about that last part! lol)

Ahd hey go for the Braveheart look. I may end up losing my focus though. <img src="/images/graemlins/heart.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

Okay Braveheart look it is just for Patty.. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

See Tik, you don't need mind games, Patty's already going to lose her focus!!

And we need to hunt down someone else for this, eh? Lord? Amadeus? *sigh* I'll wrestle if I have to...but I'll be grouchy. Which is maybe not so good for Patty and Mikie...

<img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Cat I was gonna ask if you wanted to volunteer.

What the hell happened to The Great One? As I recall he's the reason this tag team showdown happened in the first place. I got involved as he was in serious need of a Tag out.

As far as the kilt thing went. My initial reaction to Mickieboy's and CatBallou's comments had me roaring with laughter. I didn't suspect for a moment That you Mick were being serious. Actually I'm still not sure.

Anyhow, Is it still on? Or do we just drop it like a WWE Storyline?

Tikus

Ah your not sure if I was being serious well, then I better tell you I was.... <img src="/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> na wait until next weeks edition of Bella wrestling <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

If you can't get a partner I guess Patty and I win by default.. <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

I say we won.

Let's get our freak on and celebrate. They can't even keep it together for the build up of the match. They're go down hard in the real match.

However, if Amadeus, Lord, Al, or anyone else steps in, I will graciously beat the tar outta any one of em. With the help of my Mikie.

Oh now you're asking for it!

Tikus does NOT backdown! I don't know what happened to TGO, but even if I can't come up with a partner, I'm sure Vinnie Mac will be able to oblige with an interesting 'mystery' tag team partner. Hmmm, maybe not. lol

If Cat's in, I'm game. If not; We will cross swords down the line! Believe it Brother! (er, I mean Sisters!).

Tikus

Cat you still got my back right?

I s'pose I'm in, noone else seems to be interested!!

I still got your back, you still got my check?! I'm sharpening my claws right now, Patty! And Mikie, by the time we're through with you your kilts gonna be in shreds, buddy!

I may just have to sit back and allow that. Heh.

No, I must get my wrestling head on. No kilt shredding here. Cat betrayed me and now will feel the wrath of another woman scorned. You may have sharp claws but I have friends in low places.

Gentlemen, Lady, prepare for war.

LOL - you know a catfight suits me, considering the name and all, right? <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> AND Tik and I have a boxing kangaroo. I like our chances!!

Bring it on Cat and Tik we're ready for you WOOOOOOO! <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

I'm taking along my killer Haggis, they'll take care of the boxing kangawooooooo! <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

That's it. I was just sitting back minding my own business and now you want to bring me in? Patty, gonna beat the tar out of me, huh? Well, I have been hangin and bangin with the Hulkster so I am more than ready.

LET'S DO THIS!!!

7 you had just better call it right down the middle or you'll get hit in the grill. You feeling me?

TIKUS! CAT! LET'S GOOOOOOOO!!!!

Was that a threat? That destinctly sounded like a threat. Now the problem with that is, Patty screwed me in our last match and I was kinda on Tikus, Cat and your side in all of this. Now I'm not feeling the love. I'm thinking this match is not only going to be long, it's going to be ugly.

Se7en

It wasn't a threat. It was a guaran-damn-tee. However, if you are leaning toward our side then it's all good. Unless...there's a swerve in the making. I hope not. For your sake. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

So, Patty screwed you in the last match huh? I heard that about her. I heard that you cannot trust her any farther than you can throw her. I didn't want to believe it, but, if you are saying 7 then it must be true.

Thats all right. we will take care of bidness in the ring.

Excellent, now I get to go back to doing what I do best, creating havoc from outside the ring, distributing weaponry and berating the crowd - phew!

And Se7en, the only people that'll hit you in the grill are Patty and Mikie, you better keep both eyes firmly on them!! (especially Patty from the sounds of it!)

Sounds like we're creating a Stable. I Like It!

Tikus, Amadeus, Cat (and Seven?).
Oh and the Boxing Kangeroo <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

And Mick, I just wanted to confirm. Shouldn't you be going Rob Roy on us, not Brave Heart? As I understood Brave Heart was Welsh (with Rob the Bruce) and Rob Roy was the Scott?
And Scotts are not Welsh who are not Irish who are not Poms who are not Yanks who are not Aussies. Right? Right!

Anyhow, It really matters not. Our stable is a fine American/Oz combo. And Australia was a Penal Colony, so Your Lie Cheat Steal motto means squat with us.

I wonder if a cool 10 000 rph would be enough to entice the tough man from BlackPool england to our stable. Whataya say Lord?

Tikus

Didn't lord become an alcolite or something a while back? Maybe we should offer him some booze instead?

Yeah, Good point Cat, Thanks.

Umm Lord, Bintangs or Crownies?

Whats or whats?? Can't I just have a crate of Fosters?

Brave Heart Welsh? Don't make me laugh, he was Scottish. Actually I could go even more Rob Roy on ya as well since he was an ancestor of mine.

If these days we "go medieval on your [censored]", would Braveheart have to "go stoneage on your [censored]"?

I shouldnt let my mind wander...

Lord you can have crate of Fosters. But, Fosters Beer is the weak offspring of the same company that makes the much tastier Carlton Crown Lager. Tempted?

Tikus

Uh...He wouldn't be back if he didn't like what happened in the last match IF ya know what I mean! <img src="/images/graemlins/devil.gif" alt="" />

I say we make this a 3 on 3. Cat, Tikus, and Amadeus vs. Me, Mikey, and Al (Abe to his close personal friends). If I can find the poor shell shocked guy I will see if he is in. Otherwise, I'm all about a handicap match with you three, us two, your wild animals, and my referee who gets screwed er...I mean who gets handsomely paid after the matches he refs for me.

(I am so bad and I am not a role model anymore. <img src="/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />)

se7en will not be taken in by your lame promises of big money. He will call the match right down the middle. Right 7? <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

And with you on their team Patty, it already is a handicap match. lol.

Allright, enough of the witty banter. Lets do this thing.

Oh, you're so innocent, amadeus - I just assumed, well, that she didn't mean money... <img src="/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

You know, lord hasn't agreed to join the stable, we need a Brit to balance out the Scot.

You need a Brit to balance out the Scot, hmmm well Scotland is part of Britain but if you meant get a Pom to balance out the Scot then you better get a few... <img src="/images/graemlins/devil.gif" alt="" />

Oops!! You know I was/am an alcolite too, right?!! Exlains all!

And are you saying lord couldn't take you?!! Huh, punk?!

Cat is so bad yet so sharp!! <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

I am game for all who want to get into this BellaOnline Battle.

I'll fight ya with one hand tied behind my back, I'll fight ya blindfolded, I'll fight ya handcuffed. Come on. You scared out there reading this?

In the mood I am, you should be.

So jump in and show you got some grapefruits!

Umm, I think you're the one with the Grapefruits.
Unless you're suggesting Mik's got Nads the size of grapefruits. In which case he's in line for the Curtain Call or perhaps a Ric Flair low blow. Hmm, actually that'll happen anyway. See how his haggis likes that.

You wanna fight blind folded and one arm tied behind your back Patty? Sure? Do you really want to lose? Well to quote Darth Vadar "nothing can stop that now", so, get your corner man have that towel ready, cause with the team we've got assembled he'll be tossing it in faster than Lord's downing his Crownies.

Ariba!

Tikus

See, Patty. You're team has got, well to quote Vince, NO CHANCE IN HELL of winning this thing. So, we will let you bow out gracefully of this one if you'd like and just chalk it up to your mouth writing checks that your a$$ can't cash.

BTW, Cat. I am extremely innocent. As innocent as the day is long.

Patty, don't sing it, BRING IT!!!!

Ooh, you nasty...excellent!

Patty, I'm bringing the handcuffs, don't you worry! And I figured for the blindfold I'd just use Mikey's kilt. That cool?

I suggest Lord come to my side which, of course, is the winning side. I have the money, the technique, and the expertise to make you all tap and, if I get in trouble, I can always call on a "fan" in the crowd to help me. Oh yeah, a mystery partner!

Yah you would need a blindfold and handcuffs just to give Patty's team a very slim chance.

A mystery partner, eh? Very interesting. Good idea. Of course you will need every advantage afforded to you because I am a no holds barred kind of guy and I am working on a gimmick that will no doubt stymie you.

Not to mention you can delete posts if you're losing <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I can't argue with that. I'm with Patty! Now, i just need to consider my weapon of choice...

You have made a wonderful choice. I can also edit other people's posts to make em look foolish <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Ahh the power.

But this is straight up wrestling. None of those silly word games. We got us a stable and I pulled Al aside tonight and bribed...er...offered him a spot on my team as well.

Patty's Posse is growing. (This is a family site. Think it, don't say it. Ha!)

Oh, did anyone mention this is a No DQ, Falls Count Anywhere Hardcore Match? Oopsie. Well that it is, my friends, that it is.

Oh so everyone is defecting to Patty's side? Foolish, foolish people.

So what is it now? Me and Cat? Or has Cat defected too? Mikieboy? Tikus? where do you all stand?

Are you all going over to the losing side as well? We can't start this battle until I know who is on my team, if anyone is.

I don't care what you do, but you just have to let me know so I can get a gameplan in order.

That's right I am a member of Patty's Posse. We will win. We will not hit you while you are down. We will kick you, it is easier!

Al (Abe)

I think I was the one who suggested no-dq when I was just an innocent bystander as opposed to actually wrestling...d'oh? Nah, we gonna whoop you. <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> Tikus has retreated to his 'meditation' space to prepare to beat y'all.

And let me get this right, 'y'all' is now Patty, Mikie, Al, lord (you foolish, foolish little Englishman!) vs. Tikus, mad (that's amadeus, but being Australian I have the urge to shorten people's names, and I think it fits better, no?!) and me?

With Se7en as the ref?

4 vs. 3. It'll be like 4/5ths of the Spirit Squad vs. Tik, mad and I. Just the real Spirit Squad are better than you...

<img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Wonder if Ice wants to support her fellow Aussies (Tik and I)? <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

You are free to recruit anyone you feel will give you an edge over the superpowers that are my team.

If it is unblanaced, I'll just sit and let you all fight while I polish my nails. <img src="/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

My Meditation is over. So sad, whilst I was amping up Lord wimps over to Patty's side. Well, thats what happens when you drink warm beer and consider soccer as a man's sport. Next you'll be wearing a skirt too.

The Mad Man, The Cat and Tikus. Ooooo Yeahh!!!!!

Abe, I yawn in your general direction. That's how worried I am about your ring presence. Think we're over confident? I think NOT!

By the way, it's 4 v 4. You forget Cat has a very p*ssed off Rabib Big Red Kangeroo. If I were you, I'd reconsider turning up. And I think you are, aren't you? I can almost smell your Yellow.

PrincessIce, we would truely welcome your Royal self in our corner. I think Abe and Lord are easily distracted, want to prove me right?

Patty's Posse (even sounds dumb)
Just Bring It!

Tikus

Patty's Posse does sound dumb (Man, talk about bad gimmicks).

I am glad to see that the brave ones are still on my team. The other's will hiding and whimpering behind Patty.

Heck, Cat has already beaten you all just by her talking smack on the mic to you. Good on ya, Mate.

So now we just have to wait for Princessice to see where she stands. If she is as smart as Cat and Tikus, then she will join the winning team. OURS!!!

And Patty, the only thing you will be polishing is the big knot thats going to be on your head. You'll be polishing it with an ice pack.

yeah

I would say Mad is appropriate. Because thats what you are if you think you are going to win. My only concern for this match is weather or not Patty's Posse will even break a sweat. Hell, I am betting that the match is over before Patty is even done with her nails, with our hands raised in victory. 4 on 4. I think we can wait around for you guys to get a few more. We must make it even at least. And we would enjoy at least some competition. You know maybe you guys could last more than a few minutes.

Al (Abe)

Man, All of you talking so much smack. Looking at my watch. Promos for months now. Even WWE moves quicker than this on build ups.

I'm slipping on the zebra strips and headed to the ring. Michael Buffer and I are going to have a quick convo, check our notes, and get this party started. Speaking of notes, Patty's Posse vs........? Fill in the blank and I'll get the TherreTron loaded up with the entrance videos.

Se7en

The only reason Abe, that you won't break a sweat, is because you aint gonna turn up. Chicken!

Tikus

NO YOU DIDN'T! TELL ME YOU DIDN'T JUST SAY THAT! CHICKEN? Actually chicken is my favorite, nothing better than fried chicken, mashed tators and collard greens. And a Jalepeno pepper or two. I sweat more eating chicken than I will in this match. (It's the peppers) But we are a very bad team. You don't stand a chance. When we get in the ring, we are going to be so intimidateing, that our shadows will run for cover. And besides if we can't win fair and square, we will cheat! TELL ME I DIDN'T JUST SAY THAT!...........NOW CAN YOU DIG THAT!.....................................................................................................................SUCKA! <img src="/images/graemlins/devil.gif" alt="" />

We're just waiting for the other side to beg, borrow, or steal another partner so they don't cry foul (as opposed to chicken, ha) when we win. I am willing to wait but time is ticking. At least name yourselves fools! Every faction has a name. Or are you too busy scoping out the emergency exits to think of one?

We prefer to be introduced individually since this is a team of SuperStars. However, we gel well in the ring.

Actually, I think the other 2 are still trying to find a suitable Dr for you guys. Because believe me, you are gonna need one fools.

Tik'

We won't need Doctors. We already have a degree. A degree in pain and agony. And when you find those exits, you better use them. Once you check in the ring, You won't be checking out. Send them limos away. Your limo will be with flashing lights on it. Look at the front of it, it says. ECNALUBMA! When we get done there will be a victory party like noone has ever seen. Patty's Pose will go down in history as the greatest stable of all time.

Al (Abe)

Apparently the match has begun. Certainly I see what happened very differently than the possibly concussed Amadeus so I will post the real version of how things went to start the match. It's understandable that Amadeus and is assolites er...whatever...would want to have those who are unable to see the match believe that they started out on top but what happened was very different. Later, I will give my version of how the match started off.

The viewers will have to decide who is telling the truth and who is simply...working them.

How about we get you guys a Peg, a bucket and a shovel? I think you know what it's for

Tikus

Picking up your droppings when we beat the sh*t outta you?

Or picking up what's left of them to load in the ambulance and get it to the doctor. But I am afraid that the doctor, or all the kings horses and all the kings men won't be able to put them together again.

And Patty I look forward to the real version of what is happening. Cut them no slack at all.

Al (Abe)

If ya change it, Patty, I still want Mikie to be my b****, got it?

Anyone of you had a chance to start this match so I finally took the initiative. Apparantly everyone was going to talk smack until there were twenty or so pages to read. Se7en said we needed to start it. No one did. Not even the Queen of Typos.

So I did. Don't like it? Too bad. Queen, no stinkin' moderator tricks...or else.
I've already said Se7en should make the last post and declare the winner whenever he wants to. Me, Cat and Tikus are dominating the match up to this point. If you feel the need to turn the tide then go for it. Better hurry though because I feel an FU coming to Patty and then I'll execute a wrestling move on her.

Now buck up and prepare to meet your doom like the ladies you all are.

Don't worry Cat. Mikie will always be your little whiny bi***. <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Thought that was Brandi Mankiwicz from PWI??

Nah. The fans who like to be trashed by her started calling her Queen. She is too busy being a re-hash of Eddie Ellner, who was busy trying to be a re-hash of Dan Shockett, may he rest in peace.

I had thought for years that they were all the same person, just a staff writer doing it, because Eddie's personality didn't differ much from Brandi, and so on and so forth. It was only later I learned they were all real, just writing the same column pretty much.

Patty's Posse? Sounds like a Russo gimmick.

BACK on topic......

Yes, it's ALL fake. Just like Droz's paralysis. It's fake. Just you wait. D-Lo will reappear on RAW, and then Droz will get up from his wheelchair and 86 him from behind!

Patty's posse isn't that lucky to have Russo guiding them. Look at all the wonderful things he did for WCW. He could do the same for them. <img src="/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

You're just jealous because we outsmarted you. And all without the help of my lovely nemesis Russo.

Actually, there are those of us that PREFER for a storyline to have some build up. WW's storylines are against the Wellness policy (TM), since they're clearly on speed. With usually under three weeks between PPV's, it's hardly enough time to build up anything worth the $50 or whatever amount that WW is gouging from the people that can still watch without getting naseaus.

The longer they can build up a PPV the better. Why can't they realise this. They can still do monthly PPV's, but they just need to build matches slowly.

Here's an example, and since I just recently read this Chap from Superstar's Book I'm gonna use it.

He was brought into WWWF to take on Bruno Samartino. The fans wanted it, craved it! But, they built it up first.

First Superstar faced off against Domininc DeNucci. If they had PPV back then, that match could've been pre-main event card status. With Bruno knocking of a previous opponant in the cards Main Event.

Once Superstar was finished with his run with DeNucci, the fans were huge for the inevidable Superstar/Samartino clash.
That would've been good enough for the next months PPV, and the one after.

Back then everyone already knew who Superstar Billy Graham was, it's not like they really needed to introduce and build cred in his character. Although maybe that's really why they kept him and Bruno apart. even so, when they finally met the Crowd was so into it because they had waited some time before these two men clashed.

Don't these guys have a story board to keep track of who's doing what, and what the mid-long term plan is for the wrestlers?

Tikus

I don't think you can effectively build up a match with under three weeks to push it. At least not a PPV quality match. Semi-monthly would still work, but monthly is pushing it, because then feuds happen for no reason. With the greater time between PPV events, booking might make more sense. IT's rather rushed now.

This was just about a pretend match on the boards not a real one.....

Yeah I just figured that anyone who read the whole post to start with, knew what I was talking about . <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Se7en

well me nd mahh broz nd mates r always on da trampoline wrestling mii fave move is either the german suplex, over under arm hook suplex into a dragon sleeper or a double chicken wing with a body scisors

?????

Come on, lilyeah, you can do better than that. No one has any idea what you are saying. Please try to talk less in "computer lingo" and more in English so we can understand you and interact.

Most of us here are older and we don't get into the computer lingo that young people use (and apparently understand).


Thanks,
Patty

Translation, punctuation and a smidgen of grammar provided by Kwydjebo Leet Speak service. "Watching the fall of language, one child at a time". Additional commentary also provided because I think I'm funny. <img src="/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Well, me and my brothers and mates (ie Friends) are always on the trampoline wrestling. My Favorite moves is either the German suplex (Because I am a HUGE beniot fan <img src="/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />), over/under arm hook (Double underhook I think) suplex into a dragon sleeper, or a double chicken wing with body scissors (Because Bob Backlund was the Bomb)

I'm just kiddin on you lilyeah. These others don't speak L33T, so you may want to humor them and pretend you're typing here for school. <img src="/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

And if you ain't down with that I got 13 words for ya.....
"How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?" - Mankind (Some late 90s PPV)

LOL thank you for the interpretation.

Trampoline wrestling is a scary, dangerous thing and I refused to allow my kids to do it when they wanted to. Now, neither can stand wrestling so I guess I don't have to worry any more about that.