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I usually will keep my mouth shut if I am not happy with my hair and go away displeased. This last time I finally got up the guts to make a reappointment for the very next day to have a few more highlight thrown in to my hair because, even though my hair cut was great, my coloring didn't look like anything had been done at all.

When I got to the salon my hairdresser was quite annoyed with me that I had returned. She was in the middle of washing her own hair and told me to go in the basement and have a seat. When she came to get me she argued with me over my decision to have some more highlights put in. I found myself apologizing for coming back in and said, "I take full responsibility for coming back in and I don't want you to be angry with me." She just scowled and stared at me and never said a word back. In fact she wouldn't talk to me the entire time she did my hair. We are normally really talkative (about our families and such). I felt so bad. Then she washed my hair in the coldest water possible. And dried it with the hottest blow dryer setting - burning the heck out of my scalp. All the time she wouldn't look at me. She kept whispering about me with other coworkers, which I found really unprofessional.

I gave her the benefit of the doubt and thought perhaps she was having a bad day. Perhaps I embarrassed her in front of her coworkers coming back in to the salon. I don't know. But at one point I felt myself holding back tears her treatment of me was so lousy. When I got ready to pay she yelled across the salon - "No charge." I was so angry, I told her that I insisted on paying her for the service she provided. She said to go ahead then and pay her what I thought I wanted to. So I wrote a check out and tipped her again a 2nd time.

I asked my sister-in-law who is a hair dresser if this is normal behavior and she said she would appreciate a client coming back "to her" and not to someone else and especially right away like I did.

I've gone to her for 5 years, should I cut my ties with her?
Deb, That is the most unprofessional behavior I have ever heard of. And by someone who has been in the business at least 5 years, it is outragious. I would never return to her unless it is to show her this post and any others you might get.

For some reason, she must think that she is perfect and that you should be happy with whatever she does. The way she treated you certainly didn't deserve payment or tipping. Any hairdresser is going to have a client come back at some time. I wouldn't think anything of putting a few extra highlights in.

Since she has time to wash her own hair during business hours, she may be treating other clients in a similar manner and is losing some.

If she has a manager, I would calmly tell her what I thought of such behavior. -- And don't appolgise!
Yes you should.
Unless she apologizes for the way she acted.

Stylists who treat their clients in such a way give a black eye to the profession.

I am a member at several long hair forums and there are tons of stories of people asking for small trims and getting hacked. This causes people not to trust any hairstylist. One bad apple spoils the bunch.

It is supposed to be hair Care. Find a stylist who Cares about you and your hair.

Think of it this way. If you went to a different business and they treated you this way would you return?

Lets say you hired a babysitter and they were great with your kids and your kids loved them. But everytime you get home she mouths off to you about this and that. Are you going to continue putting up with that just because she is good with the kids?
As a professional Cosmetologist that behavior is highly unprofessional and you should complain. I give all my color clients 3 days to live with their hair color. If at any time during that three days they feel I did not give them what they wanted, they can come back in for one free touch=up. If it's a few highlights, thats nothing! If they don't like it completely even though I gave them what they wished and what we discussed, or the three days is up, I will gladly fic their hair for my cost. Not my labor or the standard price.. but the cost of my product.

If someone thinks they will never have a client complain or ask for something a little different even if you gave them what they asked for, you are totally from another universe. In 6 years doing hair I have had 4 complaints on color, all but one was fixed to their liking and for no cost. The other just wouldn't be satisfied no matter what (this is from her sorority sisters and roomie mouths) I am not worried about her.
How funny - I just got home an hour ago from my hair dresser, with a similar situation.

I have baby-fine hair (picture a toddler's hair!) and had miraculously found a hair dresser with the same type of hair at this one salon. Mind you, up until a few years ago, I kept my hair simple and straight, not styled because of my hair type. But after two perms in a row, my hair was a frazzled mess, and really needed help. So this woman who had helped me through the process of it growing out had some personal problems and had to leave the salon, much to my dismay. I went with another woman in the same salon on Tuesday of this week, and she completely butchered my hair. It looked cute when I left, but the next day it truly looked like I stood in front of the mirror, closed my eyes and cut it myself. I struggled with what to do next. I have a flight tomorrow to NC, to attend my son's college graduation, and could not see myself showing up looking so awful. I called the salon at 10:30pm, and left a calm and thoughtful message that I wasn't happy with my hair, I wasn't angry, but requested that it be fixed the next day.

The head guy called me back this morning, cheerfully offering to fix it himself. He was so kind and understanding. I explained that I had a flight to catch Friday morning and he offered for me to come in at 6:00pm this evening. I happily accepted. When I arrived, the woman who had botched my hair was there, and completely snubbed me, even though I smiled at her, to let her know that there were no hard feelings. She clearly did not feel the same way.

But the guy bent over backwards to make it up to me, at no charge. She had made such a mess that he had to shorten it by two inches, making it jaw length. But, I told him how much I appreciated him and that as long as it looked good, I would be happy.

I felt a little uncomfortable with the woman there, trying to pretend her work wasn't being carefully repaired right in front of her, but I was also comforted by his warmth and willingness to get me to leave smiling. I do like what he did with it, and I hope I can get it to look something like this in the morning!

It's so funny because all the woman had to do to clear the air was to get just a little humble and say she was sorry that I wasn't happy with it, and all would have been well. We all make mistakes - it's what makes us human, and I clearly wasn't angry with her. I only wanted my hair to look decent, and would think that she would want the same thing.

To answer your question - yes, cut your ties with her. It's you walking away happy that matters, not the healing of her tender ego. It's her job to make you happy, not the other way around!

Shay
Oh Deb - you should have never walked back in apologizing for not liking the way she did your hair in the first place.

I don't mean to say you shouldn't have gone back, I mean that you should have never apologized for it!

This is your hair we are talking about - a part of you that you have to live with every day. You deserve to be happy with it, especially since you are paying someone to take care of it for you.

Quote:
I usually will keep my mouth shut if I am not happy with my hair and go away displeased.


This leads me to assume that you have been displeased with this hairdresser several times. You need to find someone else anyway. You deserve to have someone that makes you feel beautiful and happy when you walk out of their salon - not like yoiu have to keep your mouth shut. frown
Another point.
We are walking advertisements for the person who did our hair. If you are the stylist do you want the client telling people they were happy with the result or unhappy? A happy client might recommend the services.

There's a difference between being a hair expert and acting like one. The motto in cosmetology school was never stop learning. That's because there is always something new to learn. This means learning from both success and failure and learning from the good clients and those who you can't please.

These stylists might be insulted that you think their hair skills are bad but the reality is that their people skills are lacking. And that's worse.
Amen to that Bubba! I constantly attend classes. I do double of what the state requires. I go to hair shows multiple times a year. I get the latest hair and fashion mags to keep up on styles.

I also educate my clients. I cannot only educate myself, but them as well to keep our relationship working.

Because of this I have clients who drive 9 hours to come see me. It shows in the clients you get and retain, and the recommendations you get as well.
Thank you 100 times for all your comments. You "professional salon" people really turned me around. And the rest of your comments - well I appreciated your sympathy. I really was going to give her the benefit of the doubt and say she was having a bad day, or perhaps just can't handle rejection. I mean, it takes one to know one. But really after reading what everyone had to say I'm no longer willing to let her off the hook. And you're right - I have been telling other people about her, so she has been getting a bad reputation because of her actions with me. I have always tipped her generously so she just lost one of her best customers. Bye Bye to me.
Good for you Deb! wink
I am so sorry you were treated so badly!! My note concerns assertiveness however; which-if worked on-will get you everything you pay for and improve the quality of the services you receive. The outrageous behavour of that person is her fault entirely but it also has to do with your 'personal power', yes? This person knows you/your threshold for her bad behaviour.

We get what we want when we stand up. I used to walk out too. But I got tired of being mad and spewing to all but the one who was now 'scott free' to screw up again. I began to want that 'judgement day' in the moment and; after a long, hard climb I beefed up my assertiveness.

I paid a stylist/colorist $250.00 6 months ago to perform expertly. She managed to do 5 things (I counted) which fully contradicted 5 things I said IN THAT APPT that I did not want. e.g. "I like to keep my hair all one length." She gave me 3" bangs!! GOOD GRIEF! Anyway I went back 24 hours later and was refunded each penny without being rude. I... was... tenacious.

First however, I needed ammo, right? I called around to find a salon who offered free consultations and discussed precisely what this person did to screw up my hair ...in salon speak. This also served to galvanize my anger and my sense of justice. Oh, NO. I was not crazy! This person really did screw up my hair and here's how.

Then off the the offending salon where I reiterated each point and how she ignored each. No raised voices, no tantrums. It took her/her business consultant 2 hours to realize she did ignore my requests and I was not leaving. Later, she even tried to keep the tip I paid. Think about that. I did, and then leaned in very close, lowered my tone and explained I am not in the habit of rewarding the undeserving. Did she believe she WAS deserving today?? I waited for a response. Of course none came. I then added I'd be happy to wait 'right over here' while she counted out my tip total and I sat down quietly.

Good luck. Give yourself the present of making certain you always get what you pay for.
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