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Need a friend

Posted By: AmyH1979

Need a friend - 02/01/08 04:08 AM

Im new to this site and just need someone to talk too. I had a miscarriage back in November. I got pregant while I was visiting my husband in Pakistan. I am trying to get my husband to the US so I stay for 6 months. When we found out I was pregnant we were so exicted. But a week after returning home, I began to bleed since it was a sunday i had to wait to see the doctor. I went the next day. My bleeding was light but it was like i had gotten my period. They did an ultrasound and learn that i had miscarriage. I try to handle it the best i could. It wasnt easy for me, I had to call my husband and tell him the bad news. My husband try to make me feel better but he knew how desvasted I was. A week before i came home i had an ultrasound in Pakistan and the doctor say everything looks great. She never caught that our baby was measured 7 weeks and not the 14 weeks that he was. After i was told about the miscarriage they took me back to the exam room right across another room where a woman was hearing her baby heart beat. I was trying so hard to be strong. They didnt do the d&c that day because of a bleeding disorder I have, and i was told that my body was taking care of the fetus. 4 days later, I started herromaging and had to have an emergacy d&c. I need up in the hospital that night. I thought that have I been coping well with it. Once in a while, i think about it and start crying. Wondering what i did wrong, if never left to come back to the US would i still be having my baby. It gets worst when i see other women pregnant or if I am out shopping and see new babies. One time i broke down crying because of a movie i saw. The woman in the movie asking why u can love someone so much that u just met. She was hold a newborn. Some of my relatives try not to mention any of it. But, today i went to my uncle's sub shop. His wife was working and say she going to be a grandma, i was shock at first and then say congrates. But when i got home i just broke down and cried. I been crying off and on. I am happy for her son and his wife, but there a part of me that want to tell god off. I know it was his will, but i still feel its not fair. I been a good person as long as i can remember but to hear that he gave a another couple a baby, just upset me. He took my baby back. I feel so bad, that i feel this way. Im not sure if there is another woman out there has experince. If anyone has please tell me how to handle it.

Posted By: jenniferlou

Re: Need a friend - 03/04/08 05:25 AM

I know exactly how you feel. I just had a miscarriage two days ago. This has been just awful. And seeing babies and pregnant women tend to make me cry. I is just so unfair. I can't help but realize how we have no control at all and God has total control. People tell me, be thankful you did not have a stillborn baby or a baby born with many health problems. They say this is natures way of taking care of things. And I guess, in a sense, it is good that I did not have a miscarriage at 8months or somthing awful like that. But this is still heartbreaking. I am guessing that time will heal...and I think love, support and understnading from our loved ones is what is needed. It is not good to be jealous, and we know in our hearts that being jealous of other mothers and their babies is wrong.
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