I've have been dating a man that I love for 9 months and things have been going well, except for this nagging insecurity. My boyfriend is very caring and has no problem opening up to me and letting himself be vulnerable. In fact, this is the most loving relationship I've ever been in and I don't want to lose it. He has some feminine characteristics and people have thought he was gay before, including gay men, but I often just laugh it off because I know that he loves me and we have great sex. But lately I've been feeling insecure by his femininity. He has a minor lisp (more pronounced when he's drunk), a slight build, and has a tendency to be very outgoing and flamboyant. I didn't really think much of it until last week at a Christmas party he was openly cuddling with his gay coworker. We were both tipsy-drunk and he made a joke of it, asking if it was ok with me if he spooned a little. I am very open-minded (I'm a bisexual woman myself)and I honestly thought it was funny. No one took the encounter seriously as my boyfriend is somewhat of an eccentric character and it is in his personality to joke around like this. Some sexual sidenotes (if this helps): he does not like anal play, he shows extreme interest in the female body, I've found female porn on his computer before (not extreme amounts, but I find porn normal for young guys). I think I'm just being paranoid, but I'd like advice, especially from someone who has been in a similar situation. Thanks :)

I think you are being paranoid. Femininity/Masculinity are not indicators of sexual orientation. THey are gender stereotypes that people need to move away from.

If he loves you, is with you, and you are the same... why worry. Get over it and feel lucky you have someone there for you! ;0)