I heard a statement on TV that really resonated with another experience I had years ago, and would like to get some opinions on it. I have a son who rejected me and my values several years ago, and at that time a psychic counseled me, He is the son of your body, but he has never been the son of your spirit. It was, and is, TOO true. Tonight I heard, "There are the children of your body, but there are also children of your spirit, in the people whose lives you have made an impact." Do you think one describes the other? What is a child of the spirit? Have you ever encountered someone who may have been a child of your spirit?

I get those feelings all the time, I really do.

I feel strongly we've had past lives. That's why for whatever reason you might be into fencing or have food fetishes or obsess over castles or the Victorian era.

Where family is concerned, I believe whole heartedly that you could have members split even down the middle...say you connect so deeply w/one but even though they may be your children feel daggers from another or maybe not even connect w/your own children but another child outside your biological family completely gets you but feels out of place in their own home.

Past lives!

Child of your Body, but not a Child of your Spirit
Perfect phrase describing my Mother and me!

I don't recall feeling a bond with her, other than family. An independent child, I didn't rely on her as much as my sisters. In my late teens, she commented to a friend something about me not loving her as much. Thankfully, he pointed out the misinterpretation. While we share a few personality traits, we are very different, and those differences have expanded over the years.

When my daughter was born, it tried to establish a bond I knew nothing of. But I don't think it works that way. Your child can be both of your body and spirit, or just the body.

However, I do think life experiences can be a mitigating factor. These can bring us together spiritually, or create/expand differences which separate. We went through one a few years back. My daughter had a rough time with drugs and it literally split the family. We did an intervention and the resulting isolation opened her eyes. She turned her life around and deserves the forgiveness which my parents and sisters continue to withhold.

Going through this, the Mother/Child bond has strengthened on all levels. Whatever tentative connection I had with my Mother has basically ended. She holds onto the blame, which now also includes me. It has nothing to do with not loving her. It's not that we have grown apart spiritually, we were never close. But it has everything to do with lack of respect and empathy.

Not a general disrespect for me personally, but of things done, choices made and my belief system, not Southern Baptist as I was raised. There are no efforts of understanding or tolerance. My daughter and I are basically excluded from my Mother's life. Out of consideration, we did not have a wedding anouncement in the newspaper. My daughter and her wonderful new husband live in the same city. An announcement would have resulted in questions with uncomfortable answers, as many of her friends apparently do not know we exist. She once said something like "I just don't 'get' you." I honestly can't remember her ever trying, ever really listening. That is not an immature supposition based on childhood memories. Almost 50, and she still does not listen to me.

I was diligent about "getting" my daughter. We talked, shared and learned together. Startling statements frequently popped out, and we discussed them. Of course, we don't agree on everything. She may actually be less of "my spirit" than my best friend's daughter. As Elleise says "Past Lives!" That certainly applies to my best friend of 30+ years, our daughters and husbands. I've often commented our daughters were "switched" at birth 7 years apart. We already knew how to deal with personality differences, we had worked through those as friends.

However the hardship my daughter endured, which we did our best to understand and support her through, has forged a "spiritual" level bond. She may not be "of my spirit," but she respects, loves, and tolerates my quirky spirit. When she says "Mom, you're SO weird!" it's with humor and acceptance. When my Mother has said I'm weird or the weirdest things happen to me, it was with disbelief and some exasperation. That's the difference.

lcp012586 -- Wow! It sounds like we've been living parallel lives. But until you wrote this, I was totally ignoring the relationship between my mom and I, and some advice my dad gave me. I've been obsessing over my "lost" son. We were adversaries from the day I was born and at one point I told her I wanted a divorce from her, that our relationship was toxic and I couldn't be around her anymore. When I had to return home after a bad marriage, pregnant and with a 2 year old son, my dad warned me that I needed to find my own home quickly as she was planning on taking my son away from me. Which she still basically did when he was 15, and he and she and my sister formed a "new" family. Many years of despair and family issues, still trying to reconcile.

That's very interesting, Eleise. I never thought to attribute it to past lives even though I've had visions of at least 2 of mine. I wonder how I can try to determine what my son's past live(s) may have been, without any contact with him. I'll have to pray and meditate on this. Thanks! I have had friendships that began with a mutual belief that we knew each other intimately before, and that I've also attributed to a past life. I can see the connection between this idea and a "child of the spirit".

FYI, how do you all manage to do such long posts? I get stopped about 1/3 of the way through as if there is a character limit. That's why I did which should have been one post as three. What am I doing wrong here?

Hi Jem,

I don't think you're doing anything wrong. It's awkward typing longer posts, but on the right there are little arrows. If you click on the bottom one it extends the post window, but you have to keep doing that. Then you can click the preview post to see if you want to proof anything.

Your family relationship is just huge! I know you know that, but I can just feel it to the core, throat/stomach, just tense!

I'm certain much of your mother's reasoning extend even as far back with her mother and/or grandmother, the criticisms especially, but it's deeper than that...like just cutting someone off at the knees.

If you had to sum up what your son's primary issue is or mutual understanding with his grandmother in how they're acting as a sounding board w/eachother, do you have an idea what that would be?

I have an idea about the sister and mother, and it's really wierd actually...almost surreal or exagerated. It doesn't feel like a balance at all.

Mom has passed, and I've honestly given her a lot of forgiveness both b4 and after her passing, but one just doesn't forget. She had lots of issues -- her own family was torn apart by WWII and the three sisters grew up in different homes, which repeated a pattern her mother had experienced when her mother gave up her children to their separate fathers to raise, reclaiming them as adults and bringing them to the US. I believe she was not ready to be a mom when she had me, only 5 years later when she had my sister. My sister and I have never been "sisters", we only grew up in the same family, with lots of the mom responsibilites relegated to me at an early age. We're trying to repair that now. My son hated my husband, his stepfather, and so did my mom, so they united in their dislike. Now my sister continues to take my place in his heart, even to acting as "grandma" to the granddaughter I'm not suppsed to know about. My sister used her influence to remove my son at 15 from a pschiatric hosp where I had him staying until I could find him a rehab facility; he's never forgiven me for that, even tho is now at 32 a recovering alcoholic & drug user. He is also repeating a pattern laid down by his biol father and grandfather. Yes, the discord is huge and will probably never be fully resolved. I'm working on writing a family history saga as a way to work on my own self, about the cycles we continue in our lives. The ggrandma above is one of the folks who visit me with regularity, even tho we never met. Thank you for listening! I feel your empathy and it helps. Tell me, please, what you're sensing.

Interesting questions jem.

Personally, I think a biological child can be either a child of your body or a child of your body and spirit.

With my children (son and daughter), I see a varying difference between the two.

My son: My first born, the love of my life. I was totally thrilled to be his mommy. He is my miracle baby. Born with water on the brain but healed by a powerful touch of God working through the hands of Baptist ministers. He's grown to be highly intelligent, reserved, still questions God (higher power) but leans more toward belief rather than disbelief. He knows of the miracle of his healing but has not fully come to accept it yet. Very much like me in the physical dimension, strong willed, smart, quick witted, tidy, strong mind, resolute, well put together, etc., but he lacks the spiritual draw, does not observe paranormal experiences when they have happened right before his eyes (and mine). He's definitely a child of my human body and has graciously accepted his mother's teaching.

My daughter: My baby girl. The other love of my life. Born of my body and my soul. She is a carbon copy of me; mentally, physically and spiritually. She began having paranormal/psychic experiences around age 3. I always encouraged her, worked with her to fine tune her abilities and supported her in every way I possibly could. She was not interested in school, although she did fairly well, she was more into daydreaming, reading and meditation. Even as early as 5-6 years old, she would meditate. I remember once, finding her in her bedroom meditating. I asked her, "Do you understand what you are doing?" She said, "I am finding balance within myself. You should try it." LOL Such spiritual wisdom for such a young lady. She didn't need much help from me, she is highly evolved and very sensitive.

Good things to think about. Look forward to your next article!

I beleive in past lives!! Though I think sometimes in a new life we may relive the same type of pattern. Example maybe we end up with close to the same life and we need to face are fears we had in are past that we never over came. like when I was younger talking to my friends we were in a circle and they all mention how many kids that would have. I just I planned to adopt. I had known for sure what I wanted at young age. So maybe I was adopted in a past life. IDK really. Though it was in my heart. Maybe things we fear so much and never knew why can help land a clue. This are truly guesses and what I felt but I'm sure other people may feel different. Much love to you!:)

jem626 - It's a good idea to write about your family. While writing on an issue or event, arranging points and selecting words, it can organize thoughts and reveal insights. It stimulates your memory, and can be very cathargic. It's really helped me the past three years.

There are so many different writing techniques. I work much of it out in my mind and then go to the computer. Other's begin with typing any and everything and then organize and edit. Find what works best for you and get started. Even if you are the only one to ever read it, the insights provided could be invaluable.

Forum note - I most often use the Quick Reply window, rather than the reply link within a post. While you can't insert photos, etc. You can type away and editing is much easier/faster.

Why not make some money out of that writing too? fellow enthusiasts are always interested to read and share experiences you could turn your scribbling into articles for clairvoyant sites ..... I write for quite a few writing sites on the internet on my site:

You emboldened me, BellaShorts. I looked at your site but I have to admit, I didn't understand enough about how it all works. But I've been keeping the conversation from "Trusting Natural Instincts" in the back of my mind, and found all those thoughts very helpful to me in my writing. It seems that when I begin to write the stories of my ancestors, I leave this space and time and although my fingers are moving on the keyboard, I am living and speaking and experiencing them. I have come to know my great-grandmother very well, even though I never met her as a living being. She seems to be directing this writing which I've now submitted to several contests. I spent five hours with her today, editing a story about how she met her grand-daughter, my mother, as a repatriated American citizen in 1947. My husband was home for the first time ever when I did this, and he said he talked to me, had the TV on in the same room, the cat tried to pull my hand down for a tummy rub, and I didn't respond to anything. I was amazed to find out the time when I stopped. I hope my writing truly honors her with the gratitude in my heart.

I love when there's a face to go along with the posts! I can absolutely see you as an author too.

It is a little weird learning how everything works. A lot of sites for the most part will at least get your skills and writings out there, which is another reason why I like a photo to go along with them. Plus you have a memorable face and I can really see that on the back of a book!

I haven't found too many sites that actually pay for articles unless you write just a ton and depending on how many hits there are there are pennies which can accumulate which is why a lot of people have sponsors and ads which help compensate.

I kind of like the idea of self publishing, like the story behind Hayhouse. People are attracted to solid, truthful info. I believe that's why bella attracts so many people.

Feel free to post if you do feel like just getting your hands wet. I'd probably put a copy-right at the bottom just to be on the safe side though

Hmmm ... what is Hay House?

Yes I know what you mean about the pennies for writings! They do soon add up though - my moderate passive income stream has become a steady trickle now, and most welcome, though modest, earnings. Still great if you like writing about spiritual experiences though.

It really is about the enjoyment of it all

It is such an enjoyment to become immersed in the writing. Sometimes when I come up to reconnect with present time I feel almost guilty, as if I've indulged in an afternoon of chocolate, bath pampering, wine, cheese. Even the research and sorting through all the bits of info behind each character is wondrful.

My husband is the same way. He can lose hours writing and researching. I'm envious of his ability to read in such depth.

How are the writings going?

Just coming on the forums, I'd forgotten so many experiences that in making conversation they're all coming back to me and with a bout of humor too

I'm back in community college, one writing class and one history class, plus yoga and piano. I've been working on sending out my stories to mags, contests and fellowships. Have a very long one started, my attempt at humor, based on some early 1800's folks who truly did try to bilk the US govt out of land as payment for service in the War of 1812 (actually never served). It is freezing here in Maryland! thanks for asking.

Have you tried e-book publishing also? Quite worthwhile if you don't mind a bit of promotion, as I found (details below.) Also, it's great to get a hardprint copy in your hands to place in local shops, bookstores,cafes and even on garage sale stands etc!

I'm riding on a cloud right now, thanks to BellaOnline! I got one of those great emails saying Mused will publish my poem in the next issue! Thank you, thank you.

This is wonderful, jem. Congratulations!

Oh, Eleise, I thought you would have known.So I'm thrilled to tell you, my first poem to be published will be in the next Mused edition. I spent about an hour dancing around the living room squealing and giggling like a pre-teen when I found out. In the meantime, the stories are going well; have two in a workshop right now.

Congratulations Jem, way to go!!!! Hopefully I'll be dancing around my living room someday.

Congrats on being "Published!" What an awesome feeling!

I'm so glad! Truly!

Actually, organizing is or was, lol, difficult for me. Last year I had a head injury so I'm rebuilding basically.

Everything takes me a lot longer, reading, writing and organizing, lol, but that was always an issue

But you're exactly right, thanks to Bella, or maybe I'm biased, but if it weren't for bella, I couldn't rebuild like I am anywhere else

I'll bet this is only the beginning, especially w/your publishing future.

Congratulations!