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Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Nancy Roussy] #865369
06/01/14 01:03 PM
06/01/14 01:03 PM
Joined: Aug 2013
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Planet Earth
Val FictionWrit/RomanceBk Offline
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Gecko

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Nancy, thank you for putting the guilt thing in perspective. I feel better. smile I know what you mean about insomnia. I have it, too. I developed it about ten years ago when I was stuck in a job that I really should have quit awhile back (I always tend to stay in jobs far past the time when I should leave!).

So now my insomnia is an established habit that the brain keeps falling into. Weird how that kind of thing works with the habit continuing long after the original cause is gone. Anyway, last night I was so physically tense that I just couldn't get into a good sleeping position. So I'm thrashing around, trying to plump up the pillows or put them to one side, and throw off the covers or pull them up. It was so immensely frustrating! That is usually how insomnia manifests with me: physical tension, and sometimes mental tension with my thoughts running all over the place.

What seems to help is (1) to exercise with a daily walk like you're doing already, (2) to listen to my 15-minute relaxation CD, which is very helpful. It's here at Amazon.ca if you're interested in having a look, and (3) getting up at the same time every morning no matter what. After some really bad insomnia (like only 3 or 4 hours sleep) and then having to get up early, I will generally feel exhausted (one might even say zombified) through the day, but that usually helps me to sleep well when the next night rolls around. Kind of a re-set. I'm also one of those poor devils that needs 8 hours (and would like to have 9 hours) of sleep to feel at my best.

So it sounds like you're into watching sports! That is so cool. You'll always have a topic of conversation when you meet people. I am kind of a sports dunce. I don't follow the World Cup or anything, and I don't even know the rules of American football. And I've actually tried to learn because I've thought, "Oh, it'll always be a topic of conversation!" The one sport I follow is boxing, but I haven't had time since 2012 when Manny Pacquiao lost the Welterweight title to that other guy -- whoa, has it really been two years since I've watched a boxing match? You see what I mean about time passing!

The reading and the activity books sound good. For people like us who do a lot of computer work, it can be essential to do something completely different for relaxation, especially if it's something hands-on. I've been casting around for something like that to do. I like to experiment with crafts like jewelry making, and I've thought about doing something like putting together jigsaw puzzles -- but what often stops me is the question, "what will I do with the results once I'm done?" I have sort of a love-hate relationship with clutter. smile

You have my full sympathy about the situation with your parents. That has got to be a difficult situation. Mine are both dead at this point, and in some ways it's a vast relief, though it sounds weird to say so. We weren't all that close, but even if we had been, I think the relationship between any parent and their grown-up offspring can hold a lot of tension.

Here's hoping we both have a good day today even with insomnia! laugh

Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Angela J. Shirley] #865376
06/01/14 02:20 PM
06/01/14 02:20 PM
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 16,487
Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
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Nancy Roussy Offline
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Nancy Roussy  Offline
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Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
Val,

Wow you have been suffering from insomnia for a long time!

When I am at my best I have to have eight hours of sleep, the ultimate best is for me to have ten hours in bed with at least that eight hours of sleep.

I started more than one year ago getting to bed and getting up at different times and I did that for more than a year so I think that that combined with all the stress and my depression that came back is what gave me the insomnia.

I like relaxation music. I started a while back listening to a new one everytime I change my email address (i change it often since leaving Yahoo a few years [it was during a summer...2011 i think] im with my 30th right now) I get them at Sequoia Records (i would give you the link but everytime i try writing 1 here it does not work and erase the rest of my post).

The link you gave me is that an album? When I clicked on it it was a book, if an album is mentioned I did not see it.

I have puzzles too. I have one with five hundred pieces and three of one thousand pieces (1 of these 3 i have no idea why i bought it...it looks not doable at all...its 1 with all the charactes from The Simpsons [bought it before 2009 so there must be some that are not there] and its like small dots of different colors...itll take me years probably to finish it...lol).

Sports is what saved me many years ago. Michael Schumacher is my god (i keep on going for him....its been a long time since we had some news...hopefully he is out of the coma and he is like he was before). The Dallas Stars are what helped me get through the awful news of Shumi's accident, if Eric Lindros would not have finished his carreer there I would of stopped watching Hockey when he retired. Ralfie is the only Tennis player I watch every games, Andy Roddick was my favorite player and Andre Agassi is the one who brought me to Tennis. When I will get up at normal hours every day I won't be able to watch Tennis anymore, it's a sport with tournaments all over the world so we get to watch it at different times all year long.

It's not because someone is family that it is someone that we should have in our lives. I'm still here because I have almost no money aside (they stole my live savings...i have no job so its hard putting money aside). All I know is the day I move out is the day I will see them for the last time. I cannot fully move on with them still in my life even if it's just by letter or by internet contact. They are only a form of negativity, the only positives they had disappeared after we moved here on November 9 2009.

Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Nancy Roussy] #865380
06/01/14 03:59 PM
06/01/14 03:59 PM
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 682
Planet Earth
Val FictionWrit/RomanceBk Offline
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Gecko

Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 682
Planet Earth
Nancy, wow, now that you mention it, it HAS been a long time! It's kind of a sobering thought how we can get used to things like insomnia that instead we should probably be trying to overcome if possible. It's not every night that it happens to me. More like a couple of nights a week, but it's very annoying when it does because I know it's that learned-behavior thing and not due to an actual cause.

Now, depression, that is a very hard thing to cope with. I've never had to deal with that, and I only know what I've read about it, but it sounds very difficult. Because it's a brain chemistry thing. It would be almost impossible to get past having it affect every aspect of one's life unless that person could fix up the brain chemistry -- through medication, or exercise, or meditation, or something like that. I wish you the very best good luck in managing the depression. And once you do, I'm sure the insomnia will clear up as well.

Relaxation music? I hadn't really thought about that. For relaxation, I've tried those nature CDs with the whale sounds and the ocean waves on the beach. Those are very soothing. And I have that CD that everyone bought back in the 1990s of the Benedictine monks chanting. If you like Gregorian chants, that's a fun one!

The link I gave you, yes, that's a book with a CD. The book offers a general explanation of the different types of the five relaxation sessions on the CD. The CD is the real thing that you use with each session lasting 15 minutes. Many people pick a favorite from the five and just stick with that, and others cycle through all five. The good thing is it's only 15 minutes. You know it's working when you start falling asleep during the CD session! laugh

Now the puzzles ... that Simpsons one sounds challenging! Especially at a thousand pieces. I find puzzles made from drawings to be more difficult than those made from photographs for some reason. I mean, when you're looking at a puzzle piece that just contains tiny dots like you say, it can start to resemble some sort of weird abstract art, ha, ha!

Sports, hmmm, so I Googled Michael Schumacher and now I know he's a Formula One racecar driver. And he's been a coma since December 2013? God, poor guy! According to Wikipedia, the last piece of news was as of March, but I hope things are improving for him. That has got to be so hard for his family. And the Dallas Stars, I Googled them, and now I know they're ice hockey. I can see how hockey would be fun to watch with all the movement and action -- same with tennis. I'm too disorganized to find all the matches, but I've watched the Wimbleton a couple of times. It always looks so suspenseful and quiet with the players under such crushing pressure to serve and yet not double-fault!

And your parents -- God, what a betrayal! I am so very sorry that happened to you. I can completely understand that you wouldn't want to see them again. I wish you the best of luck getting a job and getting free of them. And I know that has to be difficult because of the trouble we (US and Canada) have had with the economy. It's also hard to go from unemployment to employment. I've always had freelance writing, but I've had gaps in my work history between day jobs. I've got past this by doing volunteer work as a way to get back into paying work because you get a good reference and some skills after six months to a year. But you'd probably need to commute a little bit to find these opportunities -- like to Rimouski maybe? (Can you tell I've been puttering around with Google maps? smile )

Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Angela J. Shirley] #865392
06/01/14 11:12 PM
06/01/14 11:12 PM
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 16,487
Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
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Posts: 16,487
Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
Today was a bad day.

Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Angela J. Shirley] #865412
06/02/14 05:46 AM
06/02/14 05:46 AM
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 16,487
Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
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Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
Val,

Today I had the first news about Shumi in a long time. It was his manager saying that the latest news that he was in and out of consciousness was false because she had never said that. It is very confusing, why wait that long to say she never said that? I actually loved the no news part because it's none of our business how he is doing. Sure he is my god but I am not in his life so it's none of my business. Thinking that the people who are rich and famous belong to us all is one of the many faults of the human species. I think that the reason why I haven't had a meltdown about that is that never were the terms brain dead and vegetable used. Many people have spent long periods of time in a coma and have came out like they were before. Being brain dead or in a vegetative state is worst than death, he did not want that before his accident and his family I am sure won't let that happen to him. He is the best athlete ever and he is an amazing human being. He does not deserve that at all. It really sucks seeing people like him suffer when wortless evil people are allright.

I tried in two different occasions two different medication for my depression (less than 1 month each) and that made me worst. My thinking is that if you are still functional you do not need that kind of medication. Right now I am barely functional but I still am (for me when you let your hygiene go thats when you cannot function...im not there yet + i do other things too). This Winter I felt like my soul was dead and I still feel like it. My parents killed it. My Stars made the playoffs this season after not making it for five years and it was very hard seeing the games, I even missed about one minute, that killed the remaining light in me. All I had left was watching the Dallas Stars and it was taken away from me (i almost freaked out when i learned they would be on TSN but then i remembered how during the playoffs it was illegal for any channels to do what they do often during the regular season [put a match that starts at 20:00 or 20:30 after a match that starts at 19:00 or 19:30...having parts of a game not shown on tv...etc...] but this changed during the years they did not make it!!!). All I ask in life is to be able to see every seconds of every games of the Dallas Stars and I cannot even have that anymore, apparently asking for that is too much.

Here most of the jobs that are available have to do with the forests and things like that so I cannot do most of the available jobs and that maks it harder to find one.

I should start driving again. I am so stressed when I drive that I stopped driving because it was too dangerous. Here you have to drive to get around since there's no public transportation. The closest city is Causapscal which is less than ten minutes away and then it's Amqui with less than an half hour. The parking lots here are so small but the rest it's a breeze to drive. I have only driven less than five times though since moving. My plan is to drive with my dad at least once a week to Causapscal until I am comfortable enough to go there by myself, I could at least do this by myself, it sucks to have to wait for someone to do everything, Causapscal is a small town but it's bigger than mine (theres a bank [here too but only opened on thursdays] a drugstore a grocery stores a few restaurants and my hair dresser is there too).

Rimouski is close to two hours away. Matane is a little less time farter than that. New Brunswick is next to us (theres an highway right in front of our town) and with less than one hour of drive we are in Campbellton.

I walked before my match today (Ralfie is second...here it started at 5:00 so i got up before 3:00...i have a morning and night routine that i refuse to not do or change), it was so peaceful, the sun had not completely came out yet so there were barely anyone out (i love early mornings...that time of day has a smell that i love...its a magical time). Now the match before his has the first set almost done. If he finishes it fast I will probably have to take a small nap, I have a few errands and a 15:30 appointment (electrolysis [sp???] put it that late because i knew if he would play it would be over...thats 21:30 there and they dont have lights). My last television show ends at 21:00 and I think I'll start my night routine after that, if he wins I will add ten hours to my alarm clock when I'll be in my bedroom so I do not sleep too much (did not do that friday night and i ended up sleeping 0 second).

Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Nancy Roussy] #865501
06/02/14 07:46 PM
06/02/14 07:46 PM
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 682
Planet Earth
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Planet Earth
Nancy, I agree with you on his manager's statement, which is uninformative so why did she even bother? But you're right that as long as he's stable and unchanging, there is a lot of hope that he'll make a full recovery. It's scary to think that a skiing accident could result in a head injury that would lead to something like this. The same thing happened to Liam Neeson's wife Natasha Richardson a few years back; that was very tragic.

You make a good point about depression and medication. You might not even be clinically depressed but just in a stressful situation with your parents. You're smart to do your daily exercise. Everything I've ever heard says that daily walking is beneficial on every level -- physical, emotional, mental.

As for the local job situation, that has got to be difficult when you're living in a rural area and everything is oriented toward natural resources and land management. Or agriculture. It's good that you want to get comfortable with driving again because maybe something else might be available in one of the small nearby cities, anything, even service work like those hotel or restaurant jobs that spring up to support the forest industry. Not to be trying to push advice on you or anything. I wish you the very best luck if you decide to look for work in that direction. What would be ideal is if you could write for an internet publication on sports. Maybe you could write about Ice Hockey for BellaOnline? The topic is open and none of us knows anything about it. It might eventually lead to bigger things and in the meantime it might be fun. smile

Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Angela J. Shirley] #865511
06/02/14 10:05 PM
06/02/14 10:05 PM
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 16,487
Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
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Nancy Roussy Offline
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Posts: 16,487
Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
Today was a very bad day.

Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Angela J. Shirley] #865547
06/03/14 11:57 AM
06/03/14 11:57 AM
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 16,487
Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
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Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
Val,

He was helped right away and he has had the best doctors, surgeons and equipments available to him so that helped him a lot. One of his best friend is one of the most important doctor in the world and he immediately came to France to help him. Hopefully he is making a full recovery and will when fully healed tell us all. You should of seen the comments on Planet F1 on that article, all so-called Shumi fans angry about not getting a daily feedback on his health; bunch of heartless creeps!

I remember Liam's wife and what happened to her. The saddest thing is that she seemed fine which is why she refused medical help. At least that helped people like me understand that even when you seem fine to seek medical help.

When I try to find a job I always give my name to every stores, restaurants, gas stations and every other places like that. Another problem here is that people here hate any other language and culture than French and Quebec culture so me speaking English is something against me. There are many tourists here during Summer and lots of them speak English so you would think someone working at least during that time who could speak that language would be a positive but not here. I will probably have to go back to school or learn a job at a school (after learning to swim i was going to finish high school then go on a big vacation before moving out...i had timed it to my dads retirement [i was working for him] but like i said he decided to let his job go without tellinh us).

Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Angela J. Shirley] #865597
06/03/14 11:10 PM
06/03/14 11:10 PM
Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 16,487
Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
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Posts: 16,487
Grand-Métis, Quebec, Canada
Today was a bad day.

Re: What is your stress level today? [Re: Nancy Roussy] #865598
06/03/14 11:18 PM
06/03/14 11:18 PM
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 682
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Nancy, I hope Shumi is making a full recovery, too. It sounds like he has a lot of good fortune going for him, you know? He's an athlete so he was in good shape when the accident happened, and he got immediate care from the best trauma doctors available. I know what you mean about the so-called fans. They should be praying for him or sending flowers to his family, and not demanding daily updates! The internet is a weird place, and sometimes I think it is to blame for the increasingly rude behavior of people like the "fans" in situations like this.

Good point about Natasha. I remember that, too. Scary because I'm sure I would have done the same thing and refused treatment because I felt fine, but now we all know better.

And it's too bad that you being fluent in English is thought of as a strike against you, and even an impediment to getting a job! Quebec does sound similar to Northern Ireland where people are so political down to the bone-deep level that they will never get past their prejudices. But I think you going back to school sounds like a great idea. smile

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