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Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,963
BellaOnline Editor Chipmunk
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BellaOnline Editor Chipmunk
Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,963 |
Usually, we think of these people as just being lucky but it's really not a matter of luck. Those with easy marriages tend to have easy (going) personalities. They share the same traits:
*easy-going
*tolerant
*patient
*accepting
*un-controlling
*happy
On the other hand, you never know what going on behind closed doors. Everyone thought my uncle and aunt had the perfect marriage because they were always so nice. Married for over 50 years. But after he died, all the skeletons came out of the closet. I'll keep their secrets but suffice it to say, you never know the truth about another person's marriage so don't compare yours with anyone else's.
If your marriage isn't perfect or easy, ask yourself why. Mine isn't but it is quickly becoming so because I finally get that I have a lot of influence in my marital happiness. The happier, more tolerant, patient, easy-going I become, the easier my marriage becomes.
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 11,813
BellaOnline Editor Renaissance Human
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BellaOnline Editor Renaissance Human
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 11,813 |
If somebody says that they have a perfect and easy marriage, I look upon them with skepticism. I've got a wonderful and solid marriage...and it is a lot of work. It's not perfect or easy!
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 8,850
BellaOnline Editor Stone Age Human
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BellaOnline Editor Stone Age Human
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 8,850 |
Connie, I sure agree with you!
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,004
Wolf
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Wolf
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,004 |
My marriage is reaching perfection. It will take some more time.
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 8,850
BellaOnline Editor Stone Age Human
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BellaOnline Editor Stone Age Human
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 8,850 |
Modern Woman - give us some tips to your success ...
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,004
Wolf
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Wolf
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,004 |
We should think more about the other person more than we think of ourselves. Even otherwise divorce is not that common in India. So couples try to adjust with each other.
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,004
Wolf
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Wolf
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,004 |
It is certainly not easy to have a near perfect marriage. It is very tough.
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 739
Gecko
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Gecko
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 739 |
A former neighbor had celebrated over 50 years of marriage, and at the age of 85, she would quietly knit in a corner of the house all by herself now that her mate had passed. I marveled at her being married for such a long time, and I asked what her secret of success was. I will never forget her response:
She leaned closer to me and whispered: "To be married as long as I have, you have to put up with a lot of [censored]."
LOL. I was going to have that cross-stitched to hang over my mantel but thought it might be a little too crass for company.
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 1,671
Chipmunk
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Chipmunk
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 1,671 |
I'd go ahead and cross stitch it. You live there -- they don't and most likely they'd agree with it.  I can't name anyone I've ever known having anything close to what would be called a perfect marriage. I think the whole concept is mythical. LOL!
Last edited by daisybun; 02/28/15 07:11 PM.
Former Chocolate Editor. Also known as Daisybun.
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Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 11,813
BellaOnline Editor Renaissance Human
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BellaOnline Editor Renaissance Human
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 11,813 |
Our youngest son will tell anybody who will listen, "My parents have a perfect marriage." I just laugh and tell him that nobody has a perfect marriage. His dad and I are good friends and we work hard to keep our marriage strong. Yes, sometimes that does mean putting up with a lot of ___! Sometimes he puts up with mine, while other times I put up with his. HOWEVER, it is not one sided, and we love each other like crazy.
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