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Anna,

I am glad that I could help you. Be strong!

{{HUGS}}

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It's unfortunate, Anna and I'm sorry it hurts when trials like this seem to be like a "Polar-Express," ramping off into some sort of parallel Universe.

When, there's an issue from another person, placing blame outside of themselves onto a partner, roommate, friend, even relative, almost always, the problem lies w/in them and NOT you! That's the first thing.

Secondly, depending on what the issue that lies beneath really is, sometimes, this is a route that's taken to purge a release of frustration of some sort, like they're failing in some manner and choose to project it onto someone else...like "You made me...." whatever.

Or, could be the fights are a way of building up an over complex to act in a way they could not if they weren't mad enough to do so, such as leaving or cheating...it's like a diversion, sort of.

It gives an excuse or justify doing something.

Either way, relationships are hard and if you've one that's constantly pointing blame, that can even turn into emotional abuse, which in effect can be made even worse when the person appears appologetic (meaning you).

It can sometimes be they want you to get made back so they can act....justify a means confused

Last edited by Elleise - Clairvoyance; 09/14/13 04:54 AM.

Karen Elleise
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I want to put my head in a mouse-trap...!

Does that answer the question for today, lol?


Karen Elleise
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Awe Ellise!

What happened? Now I'm going to make you jealous. I had one of the best days at work for a long time. We giggled and laughed all day.

My only stress part was walking in my shoes from the subway just one block home. I'm having a little trouble with my left foot. It feels like I'm walking on bones and it hurts. That was my only stress for 5 minutes at the end of my day today at 9 p.m. I kicked off my shoes and socks as I walked in the door and now I'm having a nice glass of wine and talking to you! What a life!! smile lol (and working on my article of course!)

BTW, today at work a lot of our customers were in a bad mood or argumentative, my co-worker who I laughed with all day kept hurting herself in a minor way...I saw a full moon as I got off of the train...that explains a lot!

Don't you think?

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It sure does, lol smile

And, you made me smile! I love that no matter where we are we can converse, meet-up and just get to where we need to be.

You mention foot and bones, my husband just said that exact same thing earlier. I swear, more and more affirmations, just repetive phrases, they are increasing.

My memory/reading/writing is frustrating for me! But an emotional episode ooOOrrrr, a picture and and emotion, SMACK! Brings it all back.

So my head today feels like it's in the middle of an intersection and I'm the "Bobbie" is that a term somewhere, where they direct traffic, lol?

The day you described, normally I have those at least 2-3 a week, good ones.

Today, it's like o.k. Elleise needs help figuring something out.

Normally I cook and it goes away. I tried that...didn't help and I'm in "The war of The Roses" type of deal cat-sitting for a friend, litterally having a pisng-contest!!!!

Grrrrr and FEWEY!!!! mad Smiling on the inside... (he-he).


Karen Elleise
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I am still giving the silent treatment to my parents like they did to me many times. Except one time Tuesday morning when she tried to start a fight my mom have not tried any form of contact with me, she acts like I don't even exist. That Tuesday I had an appointment and errands to run before it so I talked to my dad but only to tell hom where I needed to go and how long the appointment would take, he thinks this is funny.

I am still doing fine with it all. Today I decided to stay here longer so I have more money when I will move out.

My mom is not oblivious like my dad so she knows that all she has to do is to apologize but she never had to do that so she hates that. I don't even have to change my schedule so I can avoid her because she is the one avoiding me. I thought about this a few days ago and I think she did not even talk about me paying for a vacation for them with my dad, one of these days when I think it's a perfect time I will ask him if she did.

My mom by doing that to me is the one who is paying. Now she is alone. After she tried to start a fight with me she went straight to my dad and I heard her say that she is tired of this. On rare occasions she can talk to her best friend on the phone and go see a nice neighbor but almost 100% of the time now she is all alone. We used to talk about everything, we could debate, confide each others, joke, watch movies, television shows, listen to music, when she needed something I could help her, she could go to the internet and she could learn what is going on in the world from me. Plus she is still sick. That is her choice. If she apologizes I will not go back to being manipulated by her but at least I will become civil again.

And the worst of it all is that on September 26 it would of been my brother's birthday. She loves to bring him up to make me and everyone else feel bad but yet she decides to ignore her only remainding child because she wanted to give her parents a paid vacation that they both wanted and needed.

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After a chaotic week with some high stress I am more calm today with low stress. I hope this will be the trend for the week.


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I've been really tired and that makes me feel like I can't do everything I need to. I just need to take a break, sit quietly and read a good book. So that's what I will do tonight.


Launa Stout
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Hi there, Very new to the site and forums in general. So this is a huge step already for me to be on here, lol. There is no doubt that I have trust issues and it takes a long time for me to feel comfortable enough to express my true feelings with people (face to face). I have seeked professional help (therapist) on this and have gotten better at the "emotional sharing." I probably didn't get in touch with my emotions until last year. I was numb for years. I am not ashamed of my anxiety. Emotions are okay and make us human. What matters is how we deal with anxiety. I don't have panic attacks every day, only when everything gets too much. I had one this morning and the last one happened about two months ago. But I don't know, it feels like my family are dramatising my anxiety even more? And I only confide in them when I feel nervous about something once a month. But after today, I'm kind of done with the sharing with them. Not after I willing listen to their drama everyday. They go, "you do know you have anxiety and depression?" Le me - *Well, duh!* "You need to handle it on your own." Me - which is what I have been doing for months on end. A lot has happened in the last twelve months of my life. There has been many funerals, career changes, a lose of closeness I used to have with two family members (cousins but they were my siblings), one terrible break-up (still single today) and my autistic brother turning eighteen (due to the transition his behavior has changed drastically and he has become more high needs). I wake up happy everyday and go to sleep happy. It's just you still have your bad days and that is okay. Things have built up again and I crumbled with the tears this morning. I only cry when I crumble under the stress of everything. I'm 21 and still live at home due to studying at uni. I write a lot of fiction, participate alot in uni clubs, have lots of hobbies and work many jobs. I do plan to move out but can't afford to yet and I have high aspirations to travel before I do. I suppose my thing today is that I'm looking for another pair of ears or in this case eyes to listen and maybe give advice. I can no longer talk to family anymore because their stress levels cannot take the extra weight of my own (so they claim which does hurt because I'm always listening everyday but when it comes to my worries, they don't want to hear it). I can talk to friends about some things but at the moment, it seems like they are spinning the conversation around and it's just about their problems. I'm just feel drained and so tried even though I'm sleeping like eight plus hours a day. I feel like my nerves are fried. Does this sound like a burnout? If so, does anyone have any coping strategies? Thank you for listening. I feel slightly better now that I've expressed some feelings.

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A lot of people who don't understand Depression and Anxiety will downplay what you are feeling. Even though they say they know what it is, it is obvious by their actions that they don't understand.

I'm not sure if what you are experiencing would be called "burnout" - so much as "normal" Anxiety. Unless you are feeling overwhelmed by school and such - then I might call it "burnout".

Either way though, (whatever you want to call it) is perfectly normal. You expect your family and loved ones to support you. And it is hard to take on someone else's problems when you feel like you are going under yourself. They shouldn't be putting that pressure on you.

If you are waking up and going to sleep happy, then I would say you are doing good on your own. It is normal to get overwhelmed and it is normal to want people to listen. That is one of mankind's greatest needs is to have someone listen and love them.


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