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Joined: Jun 2011
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Nancy, I am so sorry that you are going through such a rough time right now. Living with your parents as an adult can be incredibly stressful. I moved back in with my parents when I got divorced from my 1st husband. Everything was so awkward and I felt like I was walking on pins and needles the whole time

It sounds like your parents want to keep control of you, whether through money or guilt if necessary. You are in my thoughts that you will find a way out soon and you will have your much needed independence and solitude.


"And the greatest of these is Love"
Michelle Taylor
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Thank you very much Michelle!

It is now 19:59 and my mom has not call her friend yet. They will have a major surprise if they continue like that because when I move out they will not know how to contact me except from the internet (for them its basically not giving them contact information). If I move out but continue to be in contact with them even if it's just by phone I will not be able to stand on my own because they are the reason why I am not right now. Their talent is to put me down. They both do it their own way.

I'll let my mom have her fun and if by Sunday the phone call is not made (she will not say no to their visit...they talk at least once a week and she always asks my mom when they will come to visit her) I am starting the motions for moving out. It would be extremely hard until I find a job but I won't stay here with "parents" like that until I am crazy, they had lots of fun since I've been born with me but they won't brake me to that point, I won't let them!

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And my mom did not make the call last night! Today she is acting like everything is normal and like we are a normal family. It's a real wonder why I'm not taking lots of medication and I'm not in a psychiatric hospital because of these two people but if this continue that will be me so she better make that call or I'm out (id be out also with them taking a break BUT i could in the meantime go back to school and have more money when moving)!

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My mom came to see me tonight while I was watching television (an old movie from when i was young...i was actually relaxed and laughing...she must have psychic powers for when i feel good because she has often came in these moments to screw that up) and told me angrily to get a piece of paper because she did not have her glasses on. She said that they would go but only September 30 to October 4, she used her friend having lots of visitors and only these days for my parents so that was either mom making sure that my break would not be as long as I wanted to (that way i dont win fully...that makes her feel better) or by some type of awful luck for the next years it's really only on these dates that her visitor bedroom will be free.

I made sure to tell them that I would only pay if they go at least one full week so these so-called parents will find that gas money themselves. Tomorrow I have to go to Matane (not the first time) and sometimes it's to Rimouski they or we have to go and both ways that's four hour drive and they always find that gas money, the extra 200$ and something that they now have since I started paying the satellite bill again will make for the rest they need.

It's not a lot but it will do!

After that little break I will be able to focus on what I need to do to change my life and get as far as I can from both of them. I think I will even be able to start on that before they leave for that little vacation. I have an hair makeover Tuesday and just that will give me energy I'm sure, add that my little break from them and I think I'm going to be okay.

I'm even starting to be physically sick with all that stress. In addition of my throat issues not going away (at least with that im forcing myself to eat despite thinking im chocking) I am having heart palpitations and pains (it moves...sometimes its the head then the neck then the shoulders then the back then the tummy then the chest....it always appears when im very stressed out and it never is for long).

First I was thinking of giving them my internet information if they would need to contact me (they are not good on the computer...my mom tries but im always near and my dad does not care at all) but now I'm seriously thinking of not doing that. I'll see how they will act while I'm making my changes and decisions and how they will act when I will tell them that I'm moving out, if they for once act as normal and mature human beings I may at least give them that.

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It's not too bad today. I feel good and if it weren't for my dad's singing-whistling and my mom's whistling and singing I would of had no stress today.

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My parents are now happy about the little vacation they will take, they will regret that it's not longer! Something else happened today in our family and they are more than fed up about all that drama and being caught in the middle of it all. Especially my dad since he was always able to run away from it all before moving here, if he would of have a better memory he would of remembered all the drama from when he was living here when young and he would of picked a better place to move!

As for me yesterday and today the only stress was from my parents's annoying habits. I have refused to be put in all that family and city drama so this at least cannot affect me.

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I made a decision today! It is small but it is the first of many to come, hopefully it will all lead to changes that will make my life better!

As for my stress level that did not stress me at all having to do that today. The only stress I have been having lately are caused by my parents singing, whistling and whatever my dad is doing. I have found a way to ignore everything else they do and not let it stress me and get to me but for this I cannot seem to find a way.

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Nancy,

Have you thought about getting a little MP3 player or Ipod player and just listening to music throughout the day? That way you wouldn't be bothered by your parent's singing/whistling and such.


"And the greatest of these is Love"
Michelle Taylor
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Michelle,

I do listen to a lot of music not just with something like that. I don't have the money to buy one. I still have a personal CD player somewhere in one of my closet, I don't know if it's still working.

For a while they could know when that was getting on my nerves (by me sighing or moving around in my chair or making noise by hitting my nails on something) and they would stop for a while (my dad not always and for less time than my mom) but now they just don't care, it's like they do it more just to get me more stressed out (they started doing that before i offered them a paid vacation).

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I am proud with myself today!

A lot of things went wrong today and my parents annoyed me again and tried to ruin my day (i had a note waiting on my desk when i got up...they want 200$ for their 5 days vacation...i told them i would give them money if they went at least 1 week but i figured 200$ is cheap to have 4 nights and 3 days to myself so i will give them that money but only the day before they leave...knowing them they will spend that money then dont go) but I kept on telling myself to not let it ruin my day and it worked. That new found strenght even helped me get less annoyed at my parents annoying habits. Hopefully I will continue doing that.

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