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Joined: Jul 2011
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My husband and I had been trying to conceive off and on for 4 years. See he is in the military and has had two deployments that last a total of 20 months. Well my new gyn here in San Diego sent us to the fertility clinic and we got pregnant with the first treatment, which really surprised me. We found on Father's Day and immediately told everyone because we were so excited, as was our both our families. We would have been the first to have a baby out of our siblings. At 6 weeks I had a miscarriage, while his family was in for a visit. The whole time they were in we stayed busy so I didn't really have any time to grieve. Well its been a week and all my emotions have built up so much they finally spilled out. I never really felt pregnant but I'm still completely devastated. I work at home so I would love to stay in bed and do nothing but I force myself out of bed and try to keep busy.The doctors told me there was nothing I could have done different it was just my body ending the pregnancy because something didn't go right but I still blame myself some. I don't expect anyone to reply I just need to get some of this out.

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I feel your pain Molly and I am so sorry to hear this. My husband is Navy. We have only been married for a year and a couple months but he was deployed for 6 of those and gone on underways for a good 2 months of those as well. We got pregnant right away when we started ttc and found out when I was only 4 1/2 weeks along. We were so excited and told EVERYONE immediately. We have since decided that was a bad idea. I had a missed miscarriage Friday and found out the baby had died when I was 7 weeks and 1 day. I had a D and C on Monday.

I want you to know you are not alone. I feel absolutely horrible for you that you didn't get the time you needed to grieve. That isn't fair. All I can say now is to take the time you need. You NEED to grieve. The only way to manage your emotions is by letting them out. I am still grieving the loss and my dr told me it is completely normal and right to grieve.

The thing we don't have the "Uncle Jim" had when he died was a funeral where all the family got together to talk about the memories and comfort eachother. I know you must feel alone in this because trust me, I do too. I feel empty and I feel like nothing is going to make me feel better. I break down at least once a day and it has been almost a week since we found out.

Just take it one day at a time sweety. If you need someone to talk to that can wholely relate, please feel free to email me at [censored]. You can also find me on facebook with that email address. In the meantime, I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Last edited by Jeanne Egbosiuba Ukwendu; 09/12/11 07:27 PM.
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Thank you for your post. I haven't been on in a good while. To update you, I am pregnant again, this time with twins! We had a ultrasound last Friday and got to hear both heartbeats! Good luck in your future ttc! We sure didn't get lucky this time!


Moderated by  Christine - Miscarriage 

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