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#696214 06/17/11 04:44 PM
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This topic is being consolidated from another thread.

From Phyllis -
I read not long ago on the internet that a young couple had decided to not tell anyone the gender of their baby. They did not want the child stereotyped. Interesting concept, but how long would they be able to keep the gender a secret?

From GoodMorningSunshine -
Personally, I think that couple's decision was silly and over the top. Either gender is reason to celebrate and announce from the top of the roof a new life is born as he or she is, as the gender he or she is.


Lisa Shea, Low Carb and Video Games Editor
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I think this idea is fascinating. As I've mentioned elsewhere, my minor is in Sociology so I've been reading a lot of studies that involve how people are "trained" to fit into their society. Many of these studies involve infants.

It's shown in the US that if you hand a random infant to adults and tell those adults the infant is male, they will treat it substantially different than if you tell the adults the infant is female.

If you tell the adults the infant is male, the adults are more energetic with it, talking more loudly, being more active, encouraging the infant to be loud and active.

If you tell the adults the infant is female, the adults are more soft and gentle. They reward the infant for being cute and quiet. They are easy with the infant, not expecting it to be as active.

As a parent, I think I would appreciate the idea that my infant wasn't being "forced into a path" just because he/she had certain sexual organs.

It's interesting to note here that not every birth IS clear about whether it is a male or female. 1% of all live births are "nebulous". There isn't just "male" or "female". There are a variety of middle grounds. Surgeons then take action, usually to make the child a female since that's "easier". As you might imagine, this can have serious consequences for the child as it grows up.

It's not an either-or thing.


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personally I find the whole thing a fascinating experiment and something I might have done. but then, I am a geek and love stuff like that.

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I was obviously born a girl! but my father wanted a boy, so he took me fishing, car racing, motorbike racing, he showed me how to fix car engines and shoot an air rifle. He got my mother to cut off my long hair and treated me like a boy. He left me when I was 12 years old, he died last year.

Since, I have always been a tom-boy. Always been independent and strong willed. I was never a girly-girl until much later in life but then I had to be mum/dad to the boys.

I don't mind that he did that because he certainly made me strong enough to deal with what life has thrown at me! And I have always had long hair since.

Last edited by Linda - Islam; 06/24/11 06:22 PM.

Linda Heywood

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Very interesting subject. I wonder how it would be from the child's point of view? If the couple chooses to not reveal the gender, do they keep that from the child also? I mean, a baby does not know if itself is a boy or girl. At an early age, a child will find out some differences, obviously. If the parents did not tell the child its own gender, would the child behave differently than any other child?

We all know that a baby girl is treated more tenderly than a baby boy. If one did not know the baby's gender, would the baby be treated with gentleness or aggressiveness?

What if you put a bunch of toys on the floor, (dolls, teddy bears, trucks, airplanes, etc) and see what the baby goes for? Would this indicate a gender (stereotype) to others?


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I would have gone for the bear because I loved animals. I actually detested dolls.


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