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Joined: Mar 2011
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On 3/22, I had a miscarriage. I was 9 weeks. This was my first pregnancy. I thought that posting this would help those that are unsure if they are or not, because I searched for information, and received very little, other than symptoms that didn't necessarily match my own. The bleeding actually started a week prior for me, spotting, light clotting, and lower back pain. Nothing too intense, and probably something most would pass off as implantation bleeding or stretching. On Sunday night, at work, my back pains became more intense, and there was light bleeding associated with it. On Monday, I was back to spotting with no pain at all. On Tuesday, I knew something was happening. The feeling is hard to describe other than you just 'know'. By 7pm that evening, I had started contractions and had called off work. It wasn't intense pain, but they felt like someone was pushing hard on my lower abdomen and back. I started bleeding heavily, going through a super pad about every 10 minutes, which alarmed me, because everything I had read said that you shouldn't be going through a super pad more than the recommended 1 per hour. I thought it might have been an ectopic that ruptured. Every time I would sit on the toilet, it would just drain out of me like a waterfall. It felt awkward and awful. I gave up trying to use the pads at about 9pm because there was just too much so I hopped in the shower. I feel that this was the most efficient way to deal with it, and the water pressure helped with the pain, which never got too intense for me but was much stronger than my worst period cramps. At about 11:15pm, after laying in the shower on my back for a good 45 minutes, I sat up to adjust myself, and the birth just fell out of me. It came out about the size of my fist, along with two other trails of placenta about the same size. This is what bothered me the most, because nothing I had read said anything like this would happen. Everything said that it would be large clots, but nothing like seeing something that resembled a small liver coming out of you. Now, most would probably want to collect it and save it for their doctors or bury it, what have you. I had already made peace as to what was happening and just wanted it gone, so I let it go down the drain. Also, I never saw the bluish/grayish tissue at all. I'll admit, I didn't really want to see it anyhow, but I didn't see it. Not saying that it doesn't happen, just that it didn't happen to me. After the miscarriage, the bleeding slowed down considerably enough for me to get out of the shower. I almost passed out because I stood up too fast and hadn't gotten any nutrients, but I managed to stabilize myself. Word of advice: make sure that if you are indeed miscarrying that you have potassium and iron rich foods available to you, milk being the easiest. Losing that much blood that fast can cause you to faint. I went to the doctor the next day, that confirmed what I already knew. I think it's demeaning that they all acted like it was an 'if' situation, as opposed to me being right. Everyone used terms like 'if' and 'could be' and things that made it seem like I didn't have a clue what just happened to me. By the time I had my last examination, I snapped at the doctor when she asked, "So you had some light bleeding?" No, that's not what I said at all. I know what I saw, I know how I felt, and I know my body well enough to know EXACTLY what happened. They weren't condescending, but they weren't really concerned or sympathetic. I know that this doesn't happen in all cases. I took two days off of work, and am going back this evening. The bleeding like a light/moderate period, so that won't be an issue. For many of you, I know that going back to work is cold and apathetic. And yeah, to an extent, I am still in shock and haven't really come to terms yet, but I like work, and know that I have to move past it, and dwelling on it doesn't help me personally. I hope that this description helps someone who isn't sure and is scared about what is happening to them.

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The 'if' situation is thoroughly aggravating isn't it! Also not being able to get definate answers I found infuriating!I understand now though a bit why I couldn't be told for definate if I was having a miscarriage, but still the uncertainty I found was difficult. I'm deeply sorry for your loss and thank you for sharing such a difficult time as I believe people doing things like this increases awareness, which in my recent experience I didn't have a clue what was going on really which was very scary and distressing.

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It was very frustrating. I get that they don't want to say 100% yes, but it was almost rude as far as my perception of it. I know to the readers this was grotesque in parts, but honestly, when I was searching for related posts from many websites, I only came across one that even remotely resembled what I went through. And it is a very scary experience because even though you know in the back of your mind what everything is, you still don't expect it. Thank you for reading.

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I feel really sorry for what you underwent. It really seems painful not only physically but mentally as well.


Moderated by  Christine - Miscarriage 

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