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Gecko
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Hi, everyone!

I hope you're all having a great week!

I just added an article entitled: "Physical Intimacy and Depression." The title sounds a little silly, but Bella doesn't allow words that will get us blocked by certain filters, so it has to be G rated.

You can check out the article at:
BellaOnline's Depression Site

Feel free to comment on the article, or anything else you'd like to talk about! I'm looking forward to hearing from you! smile

Take care of you!
Kitten


Kitten Kristine Jackson
DEPRESSION

The measure to which we judge others is the measure to which God will judge us. Be kind & understanding always. : )
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U are funny - but you are saying what is correct. Even the 3 letter word that goes after "smarta--" got block (lol).

I had to edit and use "smartpants" instead. But it does allow the 3 letter word that begins with s and ends in x. Interesting indeed.

Depression does affect intimacy with me, but I make an effort as life is so short and you NEVER know how much longer you have with your "sweetie".....

As the saying goes "act" like you are in the mood and before you know it, you will smile

Works with me as believe me, I am challenged daily with "sadness" due to my past, but like you learning to work past it.

Each day makes me stronger and wiser.

As usual, a GREAT post - Tks!

Last edited by Phenix City; 11/18/10 08:57 PM.
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Koala
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Hey Kitten, great article. I know my husband and I will be intimate for a while and then it seems like we take a break and getting intimate again makes you wonder why you waited so long! Right now we are on a break. But the holidays are upon us and they are hard for me. I started seeing my therapist again this week.


Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
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Conniem, holidays can put "intimacy" on hold and add "stress" to our lives. Congrats on starting to see your therapist again. I have been there and sometimes it helps us to remain SANE in the midst of our "crisis/strees"......

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Koala
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I am off to see my therapist late this morning. Last week I told her usually I am a "sad" depressed and I am a "angry" depressed right now. I don't know which is better! Both things I am upset about I can't do anything about so I guess I just need to get over it!


Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
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Hi Conniem, getting over is easier said than done. I hate it when people say "forgive" - not easy for me. I tend to get hurt very easily and now at age 52 find myself "distancing" myself from situations at the first sign of "toxicity".....

I use to be jealous of people like my 23 year old daughter that do "forgive" - if she could not do this, she would not be talking to me (lol).

I am so glad to see you are seeking help - that is the first step towards getting help.

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Koala
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I think after so many things happen that you do try to protect yourself. This summer I made a walking friend that turned out to be horrible for me. All she did was complain about everything...I mean everything. Never said anything nice. Told me stuff about herself that I didn't need to know! My therapist told me to be careful she didn't drag me down. Luckily she got a new job and I don't hear from her anymore.

One of the things going on in my life is that my sister is causing a major uproar in the family. She has upset my parents and they call me telling me about her. She has to be the center of attention and I have been upset about her. My therapist told me yesterday just because she is my sister doesn't mean I have to like her! I had never thought of that before. I guess I always thought I had to love her because she was my sister.

I am having Thanksgiving at my house instead of going to my moms this year. My parents live 4 1/2 hrs (my sister too) and I just didn't want to have to be there and hear about the drama so I am having dinner for my kids. I think it will be very nice for a change.


Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
~anonymous~
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I agree with your therapist.

I had to learn that you can still LOVE someone, but dislike what they do. It is FREEING feeling being able to to do that as I felt guilty for not liking someone - well, hating them (lol).

Now I can tell only child, age 23 that I dislike how she treats me, not that I hate her (lol). For a while there I could honestly say I did not want anything to do with her. So much hurt.

But I am learning to treasure the folks in my life that are special.

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Koala
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Hope you have a good Thanksgiving tommorow!


Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
~anonymous~
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Thank you and the same to you smile

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Wow! Angela & Connie, it seems I've missed out on a good conversation! LOL!

Well, my sweet husband, Kelley, (whom I hadn't seen in 2 months) was here for 5 days during the Thanksgiving holiday, so I had some intimacy going on myself! smile When we see each other, we have a lot of time to make up for!

Angela, you're right--you never know how much time you'll have with the one you love AND sometimes if you're not in the mood, if you'll just go with it, you'll be glad you did!

There's nothing wrong with taking time off if you feel you need it, but if it's not mutual, it's a good idea to let your "sweetie" know it's not because he's in trouble. smile


Kitten Kristine Jackson
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The measure to which we judge others is the measure to which God will judge us. Be kind & understanding always. : )
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Jellyfish
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sounds like most people on this thread are dealing with sadness or anger which really can affect intimacy. Counseling is great for this.

But if you are having intimacy and depression issues without the emotional stuff, and especially if your are menapausal or near coming to menapause get your testosterone levels checked. A little boost in testosterone can alleviate some kinds of depression as well as get you into the "hoT hOT HOT" mode again.


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"and in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make" John Lennon


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More good advice, Arrow. smile Thanks for your posts!


Kitten Kristine Jackson
DEPRESSION

The measure to which we judge others is the measure to which God will judge us. Be kind & understanding always. : )
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Koala
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My mom thinks I am going through menopause because I have been having migrane headaches for 2 weeks now. So I am off to the dr today and thanks Arrow, I will ask him about checking my levels. When I was 28 I have a uterine ablasion and for years after that I spotted a couple of days and that was it. I haven't spotted in a couple of years now so I guess I really don't think about not having a period. I have always had migranes at least a couple of times a month.


Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
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Conniem, have you visited the menopause forum?

I did, but could never get a respo9nse to my posts (lol).

So I am figuring stuff out as I go.

Let us know what the doctors say - Tks smile

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Koala
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I looked up symptoms of menopause and I don't have any other symptoms. The dr was sick so the nurse gave me some samples to take and told me to take a pill and lay down in a cool dark room for an hour and if I still have it to take another pill. Geez, if I laid down every time I had a migrane I would be in bed most of the day! Unfortunately life does keep on going! They are going to refer me to a neurologist but it may be late January before I can get in. And I have to drive 2 1/2 hrs to go to one.


Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
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Wow! Driving 2 1/2 hours is enough to give you a headache! That sux! I know that magnesium helps with other headaches, but I don't know if it affects migraines. It's worth a try, tho'. Kelley has bouts with cluster headaches, which are very severe, too. Sometimes he throws up when he has one. I have only had one severe headache, and I won't ever forget it! I thought my head would explode! I feel for you, Connie.


Kitten Kristine Jackson
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The measure to which we judge others is the measure to which God will judge us. Be kind & understanding always. : )
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Conniem, I get migraines when I ALLOW people to stress me out and with the boss I have right now - it has been a challenge. I cannot afford to be in the bed either (LOL). I hope they get you some help SOON!!!!

Originally Posted By: conniem
I looked up symptoms of menopause and I don't have any other symptoms. The dr was sick so the nurse gave me some samples to take and told me to take a pill and lay down in a cool dark room for an hour and if I still have it to take another pill. Geez, if I laid down every time I had a migrane I would be in bed most of the day! Unfortunately life does keep on going! They are going to refer me to a neurologist but it may be late January before I can get in. And I have to drive 2 1/2 hrs to go to one.

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Kitten, I am like Kelley and my stomach - get sick to my stomach and if I could throw up I would feel better. But no, just have that feeling of wanting to. Yuk! Thank goodness I don't get cluster ones. What causes his? And what caused your's?

Originally Posted By: Kitten - Depression
Wow! Driving 2 1/2 hours is enough to give you a headache! That sux! I know that magnesium helps with other headaches, but I don't know if it affects migraines. It's worth a try, tho'. Kelley has bouts with cluster headaches, which are very severe, too. Sometimes he throws up when he has one. I have only had one severe headache, and I won't ever forget it! I thought my head would explode! I feel for you, Connie.

Last edited by Angela J. Shirley; 12/02/10 10:31 PM.
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Most of the time Kelley's are stress-related, but sometimes he gets one seemingly out of the blue. As for mine, I think it was stress-related, too. It was when I was still with my abusive 1st husband. I had left him and was living with my parents for a while, and had to deal with my brother and my dad, which was another ton of stress. Kinda makes me feel sick just thinking about that time in my life. I'd love to be young again, but if I had to live through all the abuse again, I'd much rather stay right where I am!

Poor Connie! Hope you're feeling better! smile


Kitten Kristine Jackson
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The measure to which we judge others is the measure to which God will judge us. Be kind & understanding always. : )
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Of course yesterday I was migrane free! I was hoping to try one of the new medicines! I woke up this morning clear headed so maybe they are all over with...crazy.


Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
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Hi conniem, feel BETTER and stay that way.

Migraines are a total waste of our time. Yuk frown

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So yesterday I got to try out one of the new migrane medicines. It really helped and I didn't feel all zoned out. I'll have to call the dr and see if they can fax it in the the drug store for me.


Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
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Connie, I'm glad to know that the new migraine med is working for you! That's wonderful news! Just sent up a little prayer for those mean old migraines to leave you alone. smile

Take care of you!
Kitten


Kitten Kristine Jackson
DEPRESSION

The measure to which we judge others is the measure to which God will judge us. Be kind & understanding always. : )
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I got in to see a neurologist on the 15th and today I went to pick up my medicine and about choked when the guy told me it was $66. I asked if was after my insurance and it was. My insurance saved me $206...so I am thinking maybe I got more than a months worth of pills. Open the package and that was for 9 pills! That works out to $33 a pill....and I am a big tightwad so now I am going to be hoarding those pills for a "good" migrane. YIKES! I am so thankful for health insurance. I don't think I can afford a weeks worth of headaches!


Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.
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Connie, that health insurance is like...well, it's worth more than gold! We don't have insurance. Brandi's dad is working on getting it for her, but the place he works might be closing down (I bind that in the name of Jesus!)! Kelley and I just keep praying and hoping that we can stay healthy. When we get to live together, getting insurance is first on our list of things to do.

As for your expensive meds, just be glad you have them. I've heard that the Excedrin Migraine works pretty well. Maybe that could help on the "nice" ones. It helps Brandi when she has them. She only takes the red pills if it's a bad one.


Kitten Kristine Jackson
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The measure to which we judge others is the measure to which God will judge us. Be kind & understanding always. : )
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Oh yeah, am glad that I have insurance...hubby says I HAVE to have it as I am one big ole medical malady LOL!!


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I have issues with my antidepressant drugs decreasing my libido. Any advice?

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Jilly, that's one of the reasons I stopped taking a few of the antidepressants I tried. The only advice I have is to just try different ones. There are some that don't have as severe sexual side effects.

However, if your meds are working well for you otherwise, you might try taking Dong Quai and Damiana. I was taking the combo years ago for hormone stabilization, but stopped because the libido had me climbing the walls!! LOL! It's worth a try. smile


Kitten Kristine Jackson
DEPRESSION

The measure to which we judge others is the measure to which God will judge us. Be kind & understanding always. : )
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