BellaOnline Forums Health and Fitness Depression ISOLATION AND DEPRESSION

Yep, took me alot of WASTED years to figure out my mom could not be there for me. Went through alot of counseling to finally figure out, I have no control over her - only me.

Sometimes it is folks outside the family that are there for you - like my boyfriend.

EVERY day I let him know how much I appreciate him - no matter what he is going through, he can pick up on when I am having a "challenging" day.

I use to be into how handsome or rich a man is. This one is struggling like I am financially, but I would not TRADE him for anyone else

Connie, I'm guilty of doing the same thing. I sometimes think of people I'd like to talk to, but then I think, "Everything I'd have to say is negative, and who wants to hear that sort of thing?" But the fact is that people who really care about you are just glad to hear your voice. Sometimes they can pick you up and have you laughing when you didn't think it was possible.

I guess I feel hurt about my last really close friend not keeping up with me. I was always the one calling and she was always glad to hear from me but I felt like our friendship was one sided. My therapist is always telling me to get out and be with people. She thinks I spend too much time alone thinking. Which is true, I do think about things a lot. I try to stay busy with different hobbies that I enjoy. That does help. I worked for a couple of months this year but my husband didn't like me working as much as he liked the extra money! Plus I was constantly sick. I worked at a day care taking care of the babies and I caught everything. I do miss the babies and taking care of them but the people that I worked for were real jerks so I can't say that I was unhappy to quit and go back to being a housewife!

Conniem, it is HARD to trust folks and I am just like you with females. Either they sleeping with your man or stabbing you in the back

But I am sure there are some good ones out there...........

Well, I just think it is hard to find a nice person to be friends with!

They are out there and I guess we just have to keep hoping that we run across some

Girls, I know what you mean. I have one girlfriend and she's as good as gold, but she has 3 kids, works full-time, and still has every friend she's ever made! Needless to say, she doesn't have much time for hanging out. I usually see her a couple of times a year for lunch or something. We talk on the phone maybe once every 2 or 3 months. I love her to death, but it does hurt that she doesn't have much time for me. I understand, but it's hard because I miss her. We used to work together and we were really close back then.

But I don't try to make friends anymore because I don't trust anyone. I've been hurt by everyone I've ever been close to, so I just figure the fewer people I let into my life, the less pain I'll have. I guess that's a sad way to see the world, but that's been my experience. My psychiatrist said I was just picking the wrong people. Please... I very rarely pick them.

Anyway, the way I feel about it all is part of my borderline personality disorder (which is largely responsible for my depression). It's all black and white thinking. No gray in my world. It's good or evil, up or down, black or white. I know better, but that's the way I learned to see things, and it's hard to learn to think a different way, especially when I believe I'm right about things!

I hear you! I am so over the games and apart from Sylvester and BellaOnline, I keep my distance (LOL).

Maybe when I head home, my daughter and myself can start over and maybe develop something close. Right now, we are trying not to "choke" each other SAD!!!