Aleash, I am so so sorry. That is awful. I too have had miscarrages. My first baby I lost down the toilet. I felt some thing, slippery and when I looked down there she was. I could see her eyes, what made it so heart breaking was having to flush the toilet.
Years later I chose to imagine what she would have been like, I 'knew' she was a girl. I gave her a name, and gave her to Jesus to look after, after telling her how much I loved her and how I felt and imagining what she would have wanted to say to me. I know she loved me. I cried and it helped. I know I will see her again, one day. If you can bear to let out all the pain, fear and trama and imagine your baby and do what I did it may help, when you are ready. Please let go of the fear, or you will not enjoy but worry over any new babies you may have, and that will not be good for anyof you. If there is any councelling that would help you get it out, even just a good supportive friend, who will let you take ALL the time you need, thats good.
My thoughts and prayers are with you both. For what its worth, A year and a half aprox later, after my first miscarrage I had a live very healthy baby son. Holding him made it all worthwhile. Something precious will happen, you'll see. Sending you a big hug from England.
Last edited by Eng Culture Nicola Jane; 04/12/08 08:25 PM.