BellaOnline Forums Relationships Married No Kids Pregnancy = Handicap??

I've never seen a "New Mother" parking space. All I've seen are "Expectant Mother" spaces. And it seems more and more stores are adding them. In many parking lots, people like me (with handicaps too minor to warrant applying for a sticker) or those who are completely able-bodied and baby-free cannot park closer than the 6th or 7th space from the front in most or ALL the rows of spaces.

As someone with chronic knee pain, who worked her @$$ off for 3 solid years to get rid of a limp (that still shows up when I'm tired or having an extra painful day), I'm annoyed. I don't want a handicap sticker, but I would like to have the opportunity to occasionally park close to the grocery store if I'm just hobbling in for a gallon of milk during off-peak hours. As it stands, in most parking lots, I cannot get closer than that 6th or 7th space, even if the lot is empty.

I really should consider using the "expectant" spaces on my bad days.

Myrabeth...go ahead and use the "expectant" spaces. If anyone says anything, tell them that yes, you are expecting....Expecting an aching knee to bring you to limp if you have to walk from the end of the parking lot to the store. Hey -- it is true! Now, you can park in the close spots

In Australia, we have disabled car parks (which are good if we're taking my grandmother out as she has two artificial hips and a fused spine, so walking is quite hard for her) and "Parents with Prams (buggies in the US, I think)" spots. The thing that annoys me is that the spots for parents are wider than the disabled ones. Thus, we're left trying to manoeuvre my grandmother out of the car with steps and a walker whilst parents are able to park in essentially the space of 1 and a half carparks.

The only place I've seen expectant mother spaces is at Baby's 'R' Us--which is where most people register for shower gifts around here. It bugged me a little, but I figured that it was a store that sells baby stuff, so it makes sense.

But at the grocery store? Department stores? Oh, hell no. If someone needs a handicapped plaquard, she should be able to get one from her doctor. Surely if she is in that much pain, he can get her one. Michelle, you obviously deserved one. I have absolutely no problem with that.

Hmmm......well.....society seems to consider being pregnant as normal for women. But that same society considers being handicapped as not being abnormal. So then either pregnant women are normal and should not get handicapped perks or they are abnormal and should have these perks.

Solution to the problem: Stores may have a couple of specially marked parking spots for heavily pregnant/problem pregnancy/ new mothers to park. Use of these spots to be limited to those women who have been given a special permit (similar to a handicapped permit) to use them but issued by their doctors and clearly marked with the dates for which they are valid. I would find it acceptable to let a woman's doctor decide if she needed this special consideration or not.

Where I live (in Canada) these spots are everywhere. And they are not just for "expectant mothers" but also "mothers with children".

I have to wonder how if these women cannot walk into the mall, how they will manage to walk around the mall to do their shopping. If you are in pain from pregnancy or from childbirth, maybe the mall isn't the best place for you. It takes two to make a baby and if the pregnancy is that difficult, where the heck is the man in this picture? If he can't help out then, what kind of father is he going to be?

I know, I know, I'm preaching to the choir here but these spots really irk me!

It also irks me that newborns are taken all over the place. They should be home. I would hope that there are some friends, a church, relatives, SOMEONE who could pick up the necessities for you. I hate seeing tiny babies getting lugged around.

Older children should be home more too- why is everyone SO BUSY these days?

Um -- once the mother is able to move around (and I do NOT advocate special parking spots, btw, for new parents, etc.), I see no reason she shouldn't be able to take her newborn out with her. I was at the mall, or going for walks around the neighborhood, when my ds was weeks old. And it was COLD -- I just bundled us up!

Excursions are healthy for all, as helpful in keeping the new mother feeling connected with humanity. Isolating them, without a medical reason, is cruel. If you were healthy, but had, I dunno, a limp from some minor thing, would you feel it appropriate to be told you should stay home for the next number of months, and not buy your own groceries or anything?

I would like to think that as a new mother, I'd get out of the house, and I'd have all those cool accoutrements like those sleek designer baby bags and stuff, proudly toting my new bundle around with me and getting exercise at the same time...I like to think I'd get out rather than staying cooped up in the house.

Fact is, though, I'm sure it looks much easier than it is, with all that juggling. Heck, sometimes I get irritated having to carry my purse. Still, I doubt I'd use "mommy spots."

Who knows though...I never will, for sure, since the minute I start thinking about having that kid, those thoughts of designer bags and flitting from coffee shop to malls with it are only brief flashes that immediately turn to vivid images of me hanging by a dining room light fixture. Eeek.

Actually, I'd have to agree. I think it's good for a mother to be out and about, and the baby to be getting some stimulation. As long as you're not doing something dumb like lugging a newborn to the bar, or to dinner at 9.30 at night, I'd think it would be a good thing. All the best adjusted children I've met were carted around in their carseats and strollers from practically the day they were born. I'm sure it makes them much more flexible and better socialised.

You can get out to the shops easily enough in North America, but in New Zealand the shops are only open 9-5.30 unless it's that mall's late night (once a week)(Supermarkets are open until 9pm). So if you were relying on your other half to do things after work, you'd be SOL - by the time he got to the mall, it would be shut. Makes way more sense to do it yourself in the daytime.

I don't really have a problem with mommy spaces. I'm not the sort of person who cruises for half an hour around the carpark just so I can park two spaces closer. If having the mommy park stops out of control toddlers running out in front of my car, I'm all for it. Anyone having to juggle a weeks worth of groceries and two screaming children has my sympathy - load up and get out of here, the sooner the better.

The only thing that annoys me about the whole thing is the entitlement issue - mothers expect that they should just be GIVEN these things, well, because they're mothers, doing the planet's most important job. If the space is there, by all means, I'll respect it. But if it's not, and I beat you to the kosher carpark in the front of the mall, well, open slather, tough luck...